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Well before I become a really bad Muslim and long before I was

married, I used to have casual sex with women. Sometimes, I would

express my sexuality mixing it with hatred towards women stemming

from my relationship with my mother: I would be a mean, but they

would, most of the time, come back for a while.

At present, any woman involved, even remotely, with any research run

on me is guilty to me. I would have to kill such a woman just to kill

pain of being reminded of the life disaster that the research has

brought on me. This is why I stay away from any relationship with any

of them; even though my own mother tried to force such a woman whom I

only connect with my personal research—induced life—long (to

continue) disaster. I chose to let her live – why to murder?

I need help: both in stopping all and any research run on me.

Afterwards, I need a shrink and an ethical guide; I think about

joining a mosque or Masjid. Why I have not done so? As long as any

research is going on – seeing a shrink or joining a religious

organization would go to waste; if anything it would only deepen my

feeling that doctors are useless and only cause harm to people as

well as could bring me into the Godless world of atheism.

With help that I have received many before me were lucky to avoid

jail or being fired. I hope to achieve the same; although some were

not so lucky: some got jailed or fired because of the help.

 

Sincerely,

Robert Kolakowski son of Stanislaw, born 28 DEC 1973

e-mail: dekolak

at present in Bavaria, Germany

permanent address:

138 Ripley Place, Apt. 2, Elizabeth, NJ, 07206-2121,

my mother's phone numbers: 908-353-2808 and 908-351-2858; she lives

in the same city: 1093 Sheridan Avenue, Apt. B, Elizabeth, NJ 07208.

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It seems – when they argue – that the sole purpose of their arguments

is to discredit any religion in any form or shape to present it as,

but an excuse for all evil. If one truly listened to them, he or she

would end up either as an atheist or a Satanist.

 

, " Robert Kolakowski "

<dekolak wrote:

>

> Well before I become a really bad Muslim and long before I was

> married, I used to have casual sex with women. Sometimes, I would

> express my sexuality mixing it with hatred towards women stemming

> from my relationship with my mother: I would be a mean, but they

> would, most of the time, come back for a while.

> At present, any woman involved, even remotely, with any research

run

> on me is guilty to me. I would have to kill such a woman just to

kill

> pain of being reminded of the life disaster that the research has

> brought on me. This is why I stay away from any relationship with

any

> of them; even though my own mother tried to force such a woman whom

I

> only connect with my personal research—induced life—long (to

> continue) disaster. I chose to let her live – why to murder?

> I need help: both in stopping all and any research run on me.

> Afterwards, I need a shrink and an ethical guide; I think about

> joining a mosque or Masjid. Why I have not done so? As long as any

> research is going on – seeing a shrink or joining a religious

> organization would go to waste; if anything it would only deepen my

> feeling that doctors are useless and only cause harm to people as

> well as could bring me into the Godless world of atheism.

> With help that I have received many before me were lucky to avoid

> jail or being fired. I hope to achieve the same; although some were

> not so lucky: some got jailed or fired because of the help.

>

> Sincerely,

> Robert Kolakowski son of Stanislaw, born 28 DEC 1973

> e-mail: dekolak

> at present in Bavaria, Germany

> permanent address:

> 138 Ripley Place, Apt. 2, Elizabeth, NJ, 07206-2121,

> my mother's phone numbers: 908-353-2808 and 908-351-2858; she lives

> in the same city: 1093 Sheridan Avenue, Apt. B, Elizabeth, NJ 07208.

>

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I can't help you, but you need to go ahead and talk to somebody before

you hurt people. A shrink might be a good place to start, if not, find

some *man* who has real life somewhat figured out, and can maybe help

you sort things out. Wouldn't there be a [non-fundamentalist] mosque

near you that would have somebody to talk to you? Do it now, please.

 

, " Robert Kolakowski "

<dekolak wrote:

>

> Well before I become a really bad Muslim and long before I was

> married, I used to have casual sex with women. Sometimes, I would

> express my sexuality mixing it with hatred towards women stemming

> from my relationship with my mother: I would be a mean, but they

> would, most of the time, come back for a while.

> At present, any woman involved, even remotely, with any research run

> on me is guilty to me. I would have to kill such a woman just to kill

> pain of being reminded of the life disaster that the research has

> brought on me. This is why I stay away from any relationship with any

> of them; even though my own mother tried to force such a woman whom I

> only connect with my personal research—induced life—long (to

> continue) disaster. I chose to let her live – why to murder?

> I need help: both in stopping all and any research run on me.

> Afterwards, I need a shrink and an ethical guide; I think about

> joining a mosque or Masjid. Why I have not done so? As long as any

> research is going on – seeing a shrink or joining a religious

> organization would go to waste; if anything it would only deepen my

> feeling that doctors are useless and only cause harm to people as

> well as could bring me into the Godless world of atheism.

> With help that I have received many before me were lucky to avoid

> jail or being fired. I hope to achieve the same; although some were

> not so lucky: some got jailed or fired because of the help.

>

> Sincerely,

> Robert Kolakowski son of Stanislaw, born 28 DEC 1973

> e-mail: dekolak

> at present in Bavaria, Germany

> permanent address:

> 138 Ripley Place, Apt. 2, Elizabeth, NJ, 07206-2121,

> my mother's phone numbers: 908-353-2808 and 908-351-2858; she lives

> in the same city: 1093 Sheridan Avenue, Apt. B, Elizabeth, NJ 07208.

>

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Robert,

I think we are having trouble understanding what you mean

by 'research.' In our language, research usually means a

study carried out to find truthful answers.

When you say " research done on me " it sounds as if the

research is done by others who have control of you, as if

you are like a mouse used in a laboratory. I'm sure that

is not what you mean.

Can you explain what you mean by this?

 

Do you feel that others are controlling you?

 

If you are having trouble with your emotions as you

explained about your anger problems, or you feel

that something is trying to control you, then you do

need someone to help you.

First, make sure there is not some medical reason for

your problem. See a medical doctor & explain your

problem to him. He may be able to find if you need

help he can give to you.

If he does not believe in religion, that does not

matter. He can still help you. For instance, if you

have a broken leg, a doctor can fix it even if he

does not share your religion. A dentist can pull your

bad tooth even if he does not believe in God.

 

If you are a religious person, you know that it is God

who has made all of creation, whether you call him God,

Allah, Jehovah, Yahweh or some other name.

You should know that to destroy something God created

will not please him.

 

Would YOU be happy if you built a house & someone tore it down?

Would you not be angry if someone kicked YOUR dog?

 

God will feel the same way & will not be happy if we destroy

things or people he made. He put women on this earth to help

man. He values them highly & he made them wonderfully so that

they have the gift of nurturing new life.

 

He wanted these things or people to be here on earth or he

would not have put them here. So if you find you want to destroy

God's creatures, then you are in danger of being used

by Satan or others who oppose God. So we must not let ourselves

be put into the position where we would be working against God's

will. He has a plan & nothing we can do will alter it.

 

J

 

 

, " Robert Kolakowski "

<dekolak wrote:

>

>

> It seems – when they argue – that the sole purpose of their arguments

> is to discredit any religion in any form or shape to present it as,

> but an excuse for all evil. If one truly listened to them, he or she

> would end up either as an atheist or a Satanist.

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Hi Robert,

This attitude toward women is going to get you in serious

trouble if it hasn't already.

Find a male therapist with whom you can speak. NOW!!!

Do not wait. Or speak with a minister. Get help outside of work and

they will not know about this and cannot fire you.

Stay in control or you will end up in jail if you get caught.

You should also get yourself into an

anger management group, in Germany and in NJ. This type of group is

likely to be of more help than an individual therapist and may

provide you with the support that you need until you get through

this.

David

 

 

 

 

In , " Robert Kolakowski "

<dekolak wrote:

>

> Well before I become a really bad Muslim and long before I was

> married, I used to have casual sex with women. Sometimes, I would

> express my sexuality mixing it with hatred towards women stemming

> from my relationship with my mother: I would be a mean, but they

> would, most of the time, come back for a while.

> At present, any woman involved, even remotely, with any research

run

> on me is guilty to me. I would have to kill such a woman just to

kill

> pain of being reminded of the life disaster that the research has

> brought on me. This is why I stay away from any relationship with

any

> of them; even though my own mother tried to force such a woman

whom I

> only connect with my personal research—induced life—long (to

> continue) disaster. I chose to let her live – why to murder?

> I need help: both in stopping all and any research run on me.

> Afterwards, I need a shrink and an ethical guide; I think about

> joining a mosque or Masjid. Why I have not done so? As long as any

> research is going on – seeing a shrink or joining a religious

> organization would go to waste; if anything it would only deepen

my

> feeling that doctors are useless and only cause harm to people as

> well as could bring me into the Godless world of atheism.

> With help that I have received many before me were lucky to avoid

> jail or being fired. I hope to achieve the same; although some

were

> not so lucky: some got jailed or fired because of the help.

>

> Sincerely,

> Robert Kolakowski son of Stanislaw, born 28 DEC 1973

> e-mail: dekolak

> at present in Bavaria, Germany

> permanent address:

> 138 Ripley Place, Apt. 2, Elizabeth, NJ, 07206-2121,

> my mother's phone numbers: 908-353-2808 and 908-351-2858; she

lives

> in the same city: 1093 Sheridan Avenue, Apt. B, Elizabeth, NJ

07208.

>

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> In , " Robert Kolakowski "

<dekolak wrote:

>

> Well before I become a really bad Muslim and long before I was

> married, I used to have casual sex with women. Sometimes, I would

> express my sexuality mixing it with hatred towards women stemming

> from my relationship with my mother: I would be a mean, but they

> would, most of the time, come back for a while.

> At present, any woman involved, even remotely, with any research run

> on me is guilty to me. I would have to kill such a woman just to kill

> pain of being reminded of the life disaster that the research has

> brought on me. This is why I stay away from any relationship with any

> of them; ........

 

Robert, please seek Anger Management Training. Also,

please consider finding a Therapist who specializes in

" Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing " (EMDR)

and/or " Emotional Freedom Technique " (EFT) and/or

" Thought Field Therapy " (TFT) and/or possibly " Neuro-

Linguistic Programing (NLP). These therapies can help

to jump you out of the rut in your mind.

 

~SL~

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robert................you have already started helping..........you have asked

for help and that is more than..most of us biggoted male specimens can

admitt too............all of the systems in yr replies work...and they

work fine...shari's list is excellent.......lenecke reply..most

compassionate............there is something inside of you that has brought

you to asking for help...that is greater than..the hate or anger that is

paralizing yr ability to live..............if you can do nothing

else.....sit and hold yr middle fingers...hold them if it takes an

hour.......hold them..firmly then relax...if you cant relax....hold them

until you do......do this every 4 hours...for a few minutes...you will

get to know when.......there is much help here...very much........{.this

is why praying 5 times a day works...and i know..it is one of the things i

cannot tell you about....force you to do...or mislead you}...only

you can experience the result.....................and seek out thecouncil

of those therapies listed....not a one will blame you..........and everyone

will help you to live

 

rod helfenstein; crescentwrench2003

 

 

 

 

 

 

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