Alternative Mental Health News - Article: Recovery from Bipolar Disorder

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Article: Recovery from " Bipolar Disorder " index

I spent much of my childhood crying, throwing temper tantrums, feeling depressed

and friendless. My head would race with bizarre ideas and negative thoughts

constantly. I even used to bang my head against the wall and my mother at one

point thought I was autistic.

As a teen I was antisocial, nervous, filled with anxiety. I was obsessed with

religion and God, wanting to become a nun and praying incessantly. I didn't

believe in myself, I didn't know how to interact with people, I couldn't control

my temper and I couldn't hold a job for long. At one point I thought the world

was going to end and I collected canned goods and candles against the coming

nuclear holocaust.

I clung to relationships that were unhealthy and often ended in violent

disputes. The friends I did make in university had problems like my own; they

couldn't be there for me, nor I for them.

I had my first major manic episode at the age of 23, in my last year of

university. Half a credit away from graduating, I completely lost my mind. I

ended the relationship with my boyfriend, didn't show up for class,

hallucinated, went to the local University pub and drank all my tuition money

day and night for months. I went off of my Zoloft cold turkey, threatened my

psychiatrist that I was going to give him a mental illness with a baseball bat

and took off to save the world. My sex drive went sky high. I was rowdy,

obnoxious, made new friends and got them and myself kicked out of bars

repeatedly.

I crashed into a depression so bad I wouldn't bathe and didn't leave the house

for a year and a half. The sunlight hurt, noise hurt, my jaw hurt every morning

from clenching my teeth all night. Too depressed even to feed myself, I depended

on an older man who was half psychotic from alcohol most of the time. I remember

violent disputes, cops coming over, ambulances. Once I put a cigarette out on my

hand to escape the psychological torture for a while.

I jumped from psychiatrist to psychiatrist. They put me on Paxil, Serzone,

Prozac, you name it; nothing worked. Every day for two years I was psychotic, in

a rage, acting out, crying, screaming and becoming increasingly dangerous. I was

living in a homeless shelter for six months and I was so insane that at one

point I scared everyone in the shelter. I blew up over a remark at dinner and

they all ran up the stairs and locked themselves in their rooms.

The only thing that saved me was a vague memory of a friend of mine who had

Bipolar as well. She had spent six years on disability, overweight from

medications, hospitalized every year, electroshocked 13 times to control her

mania. I had lost contact with my friend two years before and was a little

sheepish, but thoroughly desperate. I phoned her and learned that she had been

off disability for almost three years; she wasn't on meds; she was back to

teaching full-time!

She explained that she had found this natural therapy, a product called Equilib,

which a friend of her brother's had discovered on the Web. I was amazed to hear

her tell me about the 80 pounds she lost through changing her diet and all the

energy she had from not being on tranquilizers anymore. The Equilib pills had

literally saved her life.

My friend expressed her bitterness over losing so many years to Bipolar disorder

and towards the inadequacy of the mental health system. We talked for hours

about the torture of what happened to our lives and the absolute change that she

had experienced.

I thought my problem was too complex and found it hard to believe that the

solution could be so simple. However, I was so desperate and the doctors had run

out of options for me. I told my psychiatrist I had ordered the product and was

going to try it with or without his help. I needed him to wean me off the

medication, but I expected him to reject the idea. I explained to him what the

Equilib people had told me about diet and Bipolar. To my surprise, he already

knew! He knew that studies have been done on the effects of sugar on the

" bipolar brain. " But I guess the medical profession did not take that seriously

enough.

I really started to believe the Equilib product would work when I did what the

Equilib people told me to do. I stopped eating sugar completely. Within four

days I was completely stable on my meds while I was being weaned off of them. I

had never, since my first episode five years earlier, been stable. I felt like I

had just woken up. If this product could stabilize me in four days on meds,

something all the psychiatrists couldn't for nine years, they must know what

they are talking about. So I went all the way. I did exactly as they told me and

I am now stable for the first time in my life!

I am now a different person. I am no longer angry, depressed, or anxious. I have

so much energy. I am able to exercise again because I am not drugged up. I am

losing weight (so far 45 pounds!) and I going to college. For the first time I

am confident I can work full-time and study too. My memory and cognitive

capabilities have been repaired. I am in control of myself and my life again. I

am just getting to know the real me; it's wonderful and a bit scary. Now I feel

I can carry myself with dignity. I have quit smoking and started organizing my

stuff, an ability I had lost. I can actually clean my house. I don't live in a

pig sty. This product has saved my life.

More Information... More information on Equilib is available at

www.evince.org.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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