Why you should STOP Being Realistic

[Guest guest]

I liked the following article as it is the worth reading to motivate our students and guide them as well as we can also practice many ides in our own life.

 

Dr.Y.C.ZalaAgricultural Economist

 

Why you should STOP Being Realistic

 

By Dr Jill Ammon-Wexler Pioneer brain/mind researcherwww.quantum-self.com 2005.

Most of us were taught that having a *realistic*opinion of who we are basic to sound mental health.But is this necessarily true? Would we do better tohave self-illusions?

The assumption is that normal, well-adjusted peoplehave realistic views of their own potentials. And wealso assume that folks who haven't managed to developrealistic self-concepts are either neurotic, orpossibly somewhat insane.

But are these assumptions true? I would have to say no.My 30+ years of helping ordinary people achieveextraordinary levels of personal excellence has proventhat actually the exact opposite is true!

The healthiest, happiest, most unlimited people i.e.known are actually totally unrealistic about theirself-concepts. In short -- they have what *realists*would call unrealistically optimistic illusions abouttheir own capabilities and potential.

But is this healthy? Let us view the research andclinical evidence: When they take psychological tests, these *unrealistically optimistic* people consistentlydo several things:

1. They tend to consistently exaggerate their positivequalities,2. They consistently report seeing themselves as moreethical, more creative, more imaginative, and moreintelligent than they really are, and

3. If asked to acknowledge their flaws, they tend to dismiss them as unimportant.

Yet interviews of these same optimistic folks revealthat they are very well-adjusted and happy -- and notfocused on any negative aspects of their ownpersonality.

So what about those who are more realistic aboutthemselves and others?

This may come as quite a surprise. The research showsthat though these folks have a more realistic viewpoint -- they often tend to suffer from depression and negativity. They are also less likely to achieve their goals.

This indicates that having an exaggerated view of yourabilities and potential is better for your mentalwell-being than being realistic about your personallimitations.Actually -- having unrealistically high optimism aboutyour self tends to increase your motivation andpersistence. And it therefore also increases theprobability to achieve your goals. And thisobviously leads to more satisfying life experiences.

** Enter Neuroscience Modern neuroscience has identified the portion of the brain that maintains our self-concept. It's the frontallobe of the cortex located right behind your forehead.

Interestingly, the frontal lobe is also the crossroadof your brains emotional centres. Modern EEG studieshave shown that negative emotions such as fear andanger register in the right portion of your frontallobe. Positive emotions such as happiness, on the otherhand, activate your left frontal lobe.

So what? Some people are born having a naturally lowactivation of their left frontal lobe -- the happyemotions part of their brain.

And as you might predict, these folks tend to becommitted realists. They are self-judging, andfrequently have less success achieving their goals. Ifthis is you -- you may also have been labelled shy orwithdrawn as a child.

If you ARE a realist who would rather be an optimist, the following techniques will help you switch yourbrain around in the desired direction.

** Self-Reflection -- A Tool for Positive Change-Although your brain sustains your self awareness, itdid not create it. The prefrontal cortex is only yourself-awareness hardware. The software behind it is yourown personal imagery and self-reflection.

You can buff up your self-concept by talking toyourself about yourself. Years of research haveestablished that conscious self-reflection and self-talk are very powerful problem-solving and personal growth tools.

Do you have a history of depression or negativefeelings about your self and your potential? Self-talkis a long-proven tool for overcoming that oldprogramming.

** A POWERFUL SELF-TALK EXERCISE

Begin by becoming aware of the messages you are givingyourself. If you discover a lot of negative thoughtspopping out of your subconscious mind, do not putyourself down.

This is just old programming, and it CAN be overcome.It will take some effort, but pick one of your negativeassumptions and start to consistently challenge itusing conscious self talk. *I can never make a friend*becomes *I am basically a friendly person, and can makenew friends.*

This is NOT some Pollyanna approach. It is actually avery powerful, proven-effective mental reprogrammingmethod.** ACTIVATE YOUR LEFT FRONTAL LOBE

The next thing you will want to do is to activate yourleft frontal lobe i.e. the side responsible for positivefeelings, optimism, and those great unrealisticfeelings about your own potential

There is undeniable scientific proof you can activateyour left frontal lobe by simply acting happy.

EEG brain scans have shown that laughter is a strongactivator of the left frontal lobe �- and so is thegenuine kind of smile that makes crinkles around youreyes. But polite social smiles do *not* activate thesame portions of your brain.

Go look at yourself in the mirror and practice smiling.Watch the muscles around your eyes. Smile so that yourfacial skin gathers inward toward your eye sockets.This is called a *Duchenne smile,* after the 19thcentury French neurologist who first observed thedifference between a genuine smile and a social smile.

Duchenne smiles have been proven by EEG scans toactivate the portion of your brain associated withhappy, optimistic feelings. And each time you activatethis portion of your brain, you strengthen specificneural tracts connected to positive, optimisticthinking.

Give it a try. The present moment is your Point ofPower. Whatever you dream of doing in your life -- justbegin today and refuse to quit. There is greatness inyou. Just stop being realistic, and let your true selfout

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