Aging humor

[Guest guest]

AAADD- KNOW THE SYMPTOMS....PLEASE READ!

 

 

Do you have A.A.A.D.D. ?

Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.

 

This is how it manifests:

 

I decide to water my garden.

 

As I turn on the hose in the driveway,

I look over at my car and decide it needs washing.

 

As I start toward the garage,

I notice mail on the porch table that

I brought up from the mail box earlier.

 

I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.

 

I lay my car keys on the table,

put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table,

and notice that the can is full.

 

So, I decide to put the bills back

on the table and take out the garbage first.

 

But then I think,

since I'm going to be near the mailbox

when I take out the garbage anyway,

I may as well pay the bills first.

 

I take my check book off the table,

and see that there is only one check left.

 

My extra checks are in my desk in the study,

so I go inside the house to my desk where

I find the can of Coke I'd been drinking.

 

I'm going to look for my checks,

but first I need to push the Coke aside

so that I don't accidentally knock it over.

 

The Coke is getting warm,

and I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it

cold.

 

As I head toward the kitchen with the Coke,

a vase of flowers on the counter

catches my eye--they need water.

 

I put the Coke on the counter and

discover my reading glasses that

I've been searching for all morning.

 

I decide I better put them back on my desk,

but first I'm going to water the flowers.

 

I set the glasses back down on the counter,

fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV

remote.

Someone left it on the kitchen table.

 

I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV,

I'll be looking for the remote,

but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table,

so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs,

but first I'll water the flowers.

 

I pour some water in the flowers,

but quite a bit of it spills on the floor.

 

So, I set the remote back on the table,

get some towels and wipe up the spill.

 

Then, I head down the hall trying to

remember what I was planning to do.

 

At the end of the day:

 

the car isn't washed

 

the bills aren't paid

 

there is a warm can of Coke sitting on the counter

 

the flowers don't have enough water,

 

there is still only 1 check in my check book,

 

I can't find the remote,

 

I can't find my glasses,

 

and I don't remember what I did with the car keys.

 

Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done

today,

I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all damn

day,

and I'm really tired.

 

I realize this is a serious problem,

and I'll try to get some help for it,

but first I'll check my e-mail....

 

Do me a favor.

Forward this message to everyone you know,

because I don't remember who the hell I've sent it to.

 

Don't laugh -- if this isn't you yet, your day is coming

 

" Codail, suaimhnigh i nge/aga nadragain "

" Sleep, rest in the arms of the Dragon "

 

 

 

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