FUN!: Health Benefits of Teddy Bears

[Guest guest]

Health Benefits of Teddy Bears

 

Before my wife and I got married, I had no idea that some adults

maintain very strong attachments to their childhood teddy bears.

 

It wasn't long before I realized that Margaret had very real feelings of

affection for her two favorite bears: Snuffles (a brown grizzly) and

Mika (a pink polar bear).

 

I have to admit, it wasn't long before I started to enjoy having

Snuffles and Mika around, especially in the evenings when we would lie

in bed and talk about how our day went. As silly as it might seem,

Margaret has two distinct voices and personalities for Snuffles and Mika

that really bring them to life.

 

Now, instead of seeing two cute and lifeless teddy bears on our bed, I

see two important and charismatic members of our growing family.

 

Sometime last year when I told Margaret that a busy week at our clinic

had me scrambling to write a health article for our weekly newsletter,

within about an hour, I received an article via e-mail entitled " Health

Benefits of Teddy Bears. "

 

I enjoyed it so much that I wanted to include it in our newsletter, only

to have Margaret protest in horror. " It was only a joke, just to make

you laugh! "

 

Well, I just came across " Health Benefits of Teddy Bears " as I was

cleaning out my e-mail folders, and this time, without her consent, I am

throwing it up here on our blog.

 

Whether you have a teddy bear in your life or not, I hope that you find

the following article to be as amusing as I do. Enjoy!

 

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Health Benefits of Teddy Bears

By Snuffles and Mika Kim

 

For the past century, teddy bears have enjoyed immense popularity among

the young at heart. What many people underestimate is the positive

effect these bears have on your health. Not only do teddy bears make

wonderful sleep time companions, they are also effective in alleviating

many chronic health conditions such as anxiety, depression, insomnia,

obesity, flatulence, and ear wax build-up.

 

Contrary to popular belief, teddy bears do not only come in the colour

brown. There exist black, white, red, pink, and even blue bears.

However, brown is the traditional colour and is what people seem to be

most familiar with. No matter what the colour, teddy bears are

beneficial for your health. It is the bear itself that is the effective

component, not the colour.

 

Studies have shown that it is the cuteness and apparent attentiveness of

the bear that affects change in a person's health status. Cuteness

depends on how well-loved a bear appears, roundness of features, and

amount of fat the bear possesses. Bears that look too new (e.g. like

they have never been touched) or too worn (e.g. they have bits and

pieces missing) are not considered as cute as bears that look like

they've been slept on for a few years, and still have all of their vital

organs (e.g. nose and eyeballs). Round and chubby features are best, but

if the bear is too round it can be mistaken for a ball which then

renders its health effect nil.

 

Apparent attentiveness is an important feature, because human owners

(also known as parents) of the bears tend to find comfort in the fact

that their bears are listening to them. That is what helps the human to

feel like their health is improving - the attention factor. Thus, if you

have a bear that can't sit up or is always looking at something else

when you're talking to them, you should find a new bear. The best teddy

bears are modeled after wild bears, with the same shape and perky ears.

These teddy bears can sit on their bums and look you straight in the eye

while you complain about how life sucks, and their round, chubby faces

deliver compassion and empathy. However, as these types of teddy bears

are quite small compared to wild bears, they are sometimes mistaken for

pigs, especially if they are pink in colour. One should be careful to

shield these bears from hearing such comments, as they then become angry

and resentful, which decreases their ability to improve your health

condition.

 

Teddy bears are the best companions to have because they provide help in

a wide range of areas. They aren't only good for sleeping and cuddling,

which is what most people think. They have also been known to help

students prepare for speeches, throw surprise birthday celebrations,

provide therapy, and dispose of leftover honey. And, despite working so

hard, teddy bears don't need regular baths. Actually, they don't need

baths at all! You should never wash your teddy bear, as washing also

decreases their healing potential. This is a fact.

 

In recent years, imposters such as teddy ducks, teddy dogs, teddy cats,

and even teddy cows have made an appearance. Don't be fooled, as these

charlatans cannot heal the way teddy bears can. If you want to improve

your health, teddy bears are the genuine article. If you REALLY want to

improve your health, you should leave some cookies out for your teddy

bears. Scientists are not sure how or why this works, but it does.

 

References

Kim, S. & Kim, M. (2005). Interview with Teddy Bear Experts. Barrie, ON:

MooBoo.

 

http://drbenkim.com/blog/2006/07/health-benefits-of-teddy-bears.html

 

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