Guest guest Posted January 19, 2010 Report Share Posted January 19, 2010 Howdy Anya, > I'm going to print this out for my mother, Butch. Thanks for posting it. > She loved that show, but I am a bit concerned some of these answers > might cause her to pop a gasket. Starting with the first one, lol ;-) > Betcha she will roll on the floor laughing cause us " experienced " folks can remember the faces and personalities of all those characters. ;-) > All my best, > Anya > <http://anyasgarden.com/> > http://NaturalPerfumers.com <http://naturalperfumers.com/> > on FB http://bit.ly/iamja > Guild on FB http://bit.ly/1jP5lB > Y'all keep smiling. :-) Butch ... http://www.AV-AT.com <http://www.av-at.com/> > > > Most of you are probably too young to remember these days .. but some > will. Humor is very therapeutic .. almost as good as a glass of Red Wine or > a snort or two of Tennessee Sour Mash. ;-) Butch > > > > These great questions and answers are from the days when 'Hollywood > Squares' game show responses were spontaneous, not scripted. They are real > questions and answers. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 19, 2010 Report Share Posted January 19, 2010 I was too young to understand many of the jokes at the time, but many of them were still funny. Fun to see the re-broadcasts, and now “get” it. Gretta Butch wrote: > Most of you are probably too young to remember these days .. but some will. Humor is very therapeutic .. almost as good as a glass of Red Wine or a snort or two of Tennessee Sour Mash. ;-) Butch > > These great questions and answers are from the days when 'Hollywood Squares' game show responses were spontaneous, not scripted. They are real questions and answers. > > Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions. > > > Q. Paul, what is a good reason for pounding meat? > A. Paul Lynde: Loneliness! > (The audience laughed so long and so hard it took up almost 15 minutes of the show!) > > Q. Do female frogs croak? > A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough. > > Q. If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be? > A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it. > > Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years. > A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes. > > Q. You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman? > A. Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake. > > Q. According to Cosmopolitan, if you meet a stranger at a party and you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if he's married? > A. Rose Marie: No wait until morning. > > Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older? > A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency. > > Q. In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say 'I Love You'? > A. Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty. > > Q. What are 'Do It,' 'I Can Help,' and 'I Can't Get Enough'? > A. George Gobel: I don't know, but it's coming from the next apartment. > > Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking? > A. Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and I'll give you a gesture you'll never forget. > > Q. Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather? > A. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily. > > Q. Charley, you've just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the first year? > A. Charley Weaver: Of course not, I'm too busy growing strawberries. > > Q. In bowling, what's a perfect score? > A. Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy. > > Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist camps. One is politics, what is the other? > A. Paul Lynde: Tape measures. > > Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet? > A. Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I'm always safe in the bedroom. > > Q. Can boys join the Camp Fire Girls? > A. Marty Allen: Only after lights out. > > Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a goose do? > A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark? > > Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to? > A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark. > > Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people? > A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army. > > Q. It is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is it? > A. Paul Lynde: Mine may be abused, but it certainly isn't neglected. > > Q. Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head, what was he trying to do? > A. George Gobel: Get it in his mouth. > > Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant? > A. Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant? > > Q. When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for its sex? > A. Charley Weaver: I'll lend him the car, the rest is up to him. > > Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they? > A. Charley Weaver: His feet. > > Q. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do in bed? > A. Paul Lynde: Point and laugh. > > We don't stop laughing because we grow old .. we grow old when we stop laughing. ;-) > > > > --- > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 23, 2010 Report Share Posted January 23, 2010 > Betcha she will roll on the floor laughing cause us " experienced " folks can remember< Isn't it amazing that you can read these but hear the voice of the person in your head! LOL!! I laughed til I cried!! Hate the deer skinning analogies Butch, but love you!! Sue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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