birth trauma

[Guest guest]

hello everyone,

i am wondering if any of you have experience in helping postpartum

women who feel that they experienced a traumatic birth. i find that

many women who even had a " natural " hospital birth are feeling that it

was somewhat traumatic and could of been , still, more natural and to

some degree was traumatic for both them and the baby.

holistically speaking, how do we as doulas help them heal? i understand

intensive therapy may be needed but what about women who want some

subtle transitional treatment combined with doula services?

personally i also give reiki treatments and ayurvedic massage & marma

bodywork as part of my pp doula work, i believe that helps alot....but

i was wondering what everyone else does in these situations?

thank you,

blessed be

[Guest guest]

I often think we forget about good old fashioned woman-to-woman listening and

talking. we're all sisters in childbirth and parenting. We know the hospital

systems is not the right way to go for most normal births and much can be done

yet. Mothers need to teach other to be their own advocates and speak up to the

hospital authorities as that is the only way things will ever get done because

they are the customers.

We are deeply hurt when anything goes wrong with our children's births, or even

when we realize we didn't parent as well as we could have. It's part of being a

mother to have eternal regret over not being perfect for our babies. Therapy is

good if you get a good therapist and the money holds out, but talking with other

women/mothers/grandmothers who we know and trust and finding out we all have the

same needs, heartaches, regrets, wishes, etc. is also very good for the soul. We

don't necessarily need to think of ourselves as traumatized, but better to think

of ways we can prevent the problem in the future for ourselves and other women.

I know if I had it to do over I would have a home birth and I suggest it to

every pregnant woman I see. It's women's business, as I see it. Hospitals are

for trauma.

 

Vicky York, IBCLC, CPD

Postpartum Care Services

Portland, Oregon

http://mypeoplepc.com/members/vmyork/

http://vmyork.ikarma.com/id269

 

 

 

[Guest guest]

In our doula training, our beloved Whapio taught us that a hugh part of our

work to bedone at this time is to support women in healing the traumas that are

running rampid in this day and age.

 

Heres some healing tips i have learned:

 

Begin by listening and validating her experience, while not feeding the

negativity, Hold space while allowing her to greive is a great gift to offer

any woman who has sadness and regret about her birth experience

 

You can tell after someone has cleared some sadness from the heart. There is a

stillness and if tears, a ceasing to the tears.. a pause, or a question for

you..at that point, share positive thoughts and let her know the clearing is

happening and there is now no need to hold onto regrets..This will help her move

forward..

 

Good Luck

Lara Narayani

VMYORK wrote:

I often think we forget about good old fashioned woman-to-woman listening and

talking. we're all sisters in childbirth and parenting. We know the hospital

systems is not the right way to go for most normal births and much can be done

yet. Mothers need to teach other to be their own advocates and speak up to the

hospital authorities as that is the only way things will ever get done because

they are the customers.

We are deeply hurt when anything goes wrong with our children's births, or even

when we realize we didn't parent as well as we could have. It's part of being a

mother to have eternal regret over not being perfect for our babies. Therapy is

good if you get a good therapist and the money holds out, but talking with other

women/mothers/grandmothers who we know and trust and finding out we all have the

same needs, heartaches, regrets, wishes, etc. is also very good for the soul. We

don't necessarily need to think of ourselves as traumatized, but better to think

of ways we can prevent the problem in the future for ourselves and other women.

I know if I had it to do over I would have a home birth and I suggest it to

every pregnant woman I see. It's women's business, as I see it. Hospitals are

for trauma.

 

Vicky York, IBCLC, CPD

Postpartum Care Services

Portland, Oregon

http://mypeoplepc.com/members/vmyork/

http://vmyork.ikarma.com/id269

 

[Guest guest]

thank you for that Lara, that's wonderful. Vicky

 

 

[Guest guest]

Hi Laura -

Do you remember Whapio's discussion about the altered state of a

mother as she goes deeper into the birthing process, and how birth

attendants can best honor that process? It was such a beautiful

perspective, so different from how many see birth. I'd love to hear

it again, and again.

Love,

Ysha

 

> In our doula training, our beloved Whapio taught us that a hugh

part of our work to bedone at this time is to support women in healing

the traumas that are running rampid in this day and age.

[Guest guest]

mmmm. Yes Whapio said birth is an altered state. She reminds us again and

again..if you have ever been in an altered state, one can assist a Mama through

birth ..

 

Thanks for the reminder

 

Blessings

Lara Nara

Ysha Oakes <AyurDoulas wrote: Hi Laura -

Do you remember Whapio's discussion about the altered state of a

mother as she goes deeper into the birthing process, and how birth

attendants can best honor that process? It was such a beautiful

perspective, so different from how many see birth. I'd love to hear

it again, and again.

Love,

Ysha

 

> In our doula training, our beloved Whapio taught us that a hugh

part of our work to bedone at this time is to support women in healing

the traumas that are running rampid in this day and age.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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