(OT) HAVING A BAD DAY?

[Guest guest]

Fw: Having a Bad Day??

 

THE NEXT TIME YOU THINK YOU ARE HAVING A BAD DAY: fire authorities in California

found a corpse in a burned out section of forest while assessing the damage done

by a forest fire. The deceased male was dressed in a full wet suit, complete

with scuba tanks on his back, flippers, and facemask. A post-mortem revealed

that the person died not from burns, but from massive internal injuries. Dental

records provided a positive identification. Investigators then set about to

determine how a fully clad diver ended up in the middle of a forest fire. It was

revealed that on the day of the fire, the person went for a diving trip off the

coast some 20 miles from the forest. The firefighters, seeking to control the

fire as quickly as possible, called in a fleet of helicopters with very large

dip buckets. Water was dipped from the ocean and then flown to the forest fire

and emptied. You guessed it. One minute our diver was making like Flipper in the

Pacific, the next he was doing the breast stroke in a fire dip bucket 300 feet

in the air. Some days it just doesn't pay to get out of bed.

-- STILL THINK YOU ARE HAVING A BAD DAY? A man

was working on his motorcycle on his patio and his wife was in the kitchen. The

man was racing the engine on the motorcycle when it accidentally slipped into

gear. The man, still holding onto the handlebars was dragged through the glass

patio doors and along with the motorcycle dumped onto the floor inside the

house. The wife hearing the crash, ran into the dining room and found her

husband lying on the floor, cut and bleeding, the motorcycle lying next to him,

and the shattered patio door. The wife ran to the phone and summoned the

ambulance. Because they lived on a fairly large hill, the wife went down the

several flights of stairs to the street to escort the paramedics to her husband.

After the ambulance arrived and transported the man to the hospital, the wife up

righted the motorcycle and pushed it outside. Seeing that gas was spilled on the

floor, the wife got some paper towels, blotted up the gasoline, and threw the

towels in the toilet. The man was treated and released to come home. Upon

arriving home, he looked at the shattered patio door and the damage done

tohismotorcycle. He became despondent, went to the bathroom, sat down on the

toilet and smoked a cigarette. After finishing the cigarette, he flipped the

cigarette into the bowl while seated. The wife, who was in the kitchen, heard

the loud explosion and her husband screaming. She ran into the bathroom and

found her husband lying on the floor. His trousers had been blown away and he

was suffering burns on the buttocks, the back of his legs, and his groin. The

wife again ran to the phone to call the ambulance. The very same paramedic crew

was dispatched and the wife met them at the street. The paramedics loaded the

husband on to the stretcher and began carrying him to the street. While they

were going down the stairs to the street accompanied by the wife, one of the

paramedics asked the wife how the husband had burned himself. She told them and

the paramedics started laughing so hard, one of them slipped and tipped the

stretcher dumping the husband out. He fell down the remaining stairs and broke

his arm. Taken from a Florida Newspaper.

-- STILL HAVING A BAD DAY? Just remember, it

could be worse... The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon

Valdez oil spill in Alaska was $80,000. At a special ceremony, two of the most

expensively saved animals were released back into the wild amid cheers and

applause from onlookers. A minute later, in full view, a killer whale ate them

both.

- .. . . . .A woman came home to find her

husband in the kitchen, shaking frantically with what looked like a wire running

from his waist towards the electric kettle. Intending to jolt him away from the

deadly current she whacked him with a handy plank of wood by the back door,

breaking his arm in two places. Until that moment he had been happily listening

to his Walkman.

-- .. . . . Two animal rights protesters were

protesting at the cruelty of sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn, Germany.

Suddenly the pigs, all two thousand of them, escaped through a broken fence and

stampeded, trampling the two hapless protesters to death.

-- And finally... Iraqi terrorist, Khay

Rahnajet, didn't pay enough postage on a letter bomb. It came back with " return

to sender " stamped on it. Forgetting it was the bomb, he opened it and was blown

to bits. Now, your day's not so bad, is it? NOW, GO HAVE A GOOD DAY!!!

 

--- Phyllis Cline

--- clicline

--- EarthLink: The #1 provider of the Real Internet.