Why does helping a friend tend to piss them off?

[Guest guest]

Sunday I'm at the flea market.

 

Dave, my friend and a dealer at that flea market is attempting to

sell this Mexican (Carlos) a microwave for $15 bucks. Dave had

already knocked $5 bucks off the price, from $20 down to $15.

 

He tells Carlos, " no you can't have it for $10 bucks, I need $15

bucks " , as Dave shakes his head from left to right in the basic " no "

pattern.

 

Carlos puts the microwave down and backs off from it.

 

So I decided to play.

 

I went over to the microwave and as I nodded my head " yes " , I

said, " Wow Dave, all you want for this microwave is $15 bucks. Gees

it's worth a lot more than that! " I touched the microwave. And all

the time I was nodding my head back and forwards like in the

unconscious " yes " body analog.

 

Carlos gets this confused look in his eyes and pulls $15 bucks out

of his pocket.

 

Dave, a deep kinesthetic, never even noticed the $15 bucks, never

even noticed what I'd done...

 

....and dropped his price to $13 bucks EVEN THOUGH Carlos had handed

him $15 bucks.

 

So Dave gives Carlos $2 bucks change.

 

I decided to teach Dave how to do what I did.

 

Dave got angry at me. He said, " I know how to do that " , as he

continued to shake his head from side to side in the basic " no "

pattern.

 

Group, what in HELL is this post about?

 

 

[Guest guest]

We all compare and measure and follow subliminal cues - especially in

group settings. Marketplace settings. There must be congruence between

what you say and what you do. (the vendor was shaking his head no!)

 

You made Carlos 'want' the microwave -- by touching it, surrounding it

with good energy. By acting as if you completely wanted that microwave

yourself. You established a value and you established congruence.

 

Carlos 'coveted' that particular microwave (he already established he

wanted 'a' microwave).

 

I enjoy the Hollywood Farmer's Market. Tons of people, lots of great

vendors. Amazing fresh foods. A real old fashioned marketplace.

 

It's fun to watch how people cluster and move to a vendor stand. It's

fun to watch how the vendors touch their produce -- and how people want

the fruits that are touched in a caring way....

 

Helen

 

 

On Sep 4, 2006, at 6:24 PM, kahunamaker wrote:

 

> Sunday I'm at the flea market.

>

> Dave, my friend and a dealer at that flea market is attempting to

> sell this Mexican (Carlos) a microwave for $15 bucks. Dave had

> already knocked $5 bucks off the price, from $20 down to $15.

>

> He tells Carlos, " no you can't have it for $10 bucks, I need $15

> bucks " , as Dave shakes his head from left to right in the basic " no "

> pattern.

>

> Carlos puts the microwave down and backs off from it.

>

> So I decided to play.

>

> I went over to the microwave and as I nodded my head " yes " , I

> said, " Wow Dave, all you want for this microwave is $15 bucks. Gees

> it's worth a lot more than that! " I touched the microwave. And all

> the time I was nodding my head back and forwards like in the

> unconscious " yes " body analog.

>

> Carlos gets this confused look in his eyes and pulls $15 bucks out

> of his pocket.

>

> Dave, a deep kinesthetic, never even noticed the $15 bucks, never

> even noticed what I'd done...

>

> ...and dropped his price to $13 bucks EVEN THOUGH Carlos had handed

> him $15 bucks.

>

> So Dave gives Carlos $2 bucks change.

>

> I decided to teach Dave how to do what I did.

>

> Dave got angry at me. He said, " I know how to do that " , as he

> continued to shake his head from side to side in the basic " no "

> pattern.

>

> Group, what in HELL is this post about?

>

>

>

>

>

>