Digest Number 162

[Guest guest]

At 23:44 02-12-1999 , you wrote:

 

>Message: 2

> 2 Dec 1999 00:39:07 -0000

> johnrzeznik2

>do nlp tapes really work?

>

>hi,iam new to this list.i have a question about nlp.can nlp tapes really

>change your whole personality,and enthusiasm u have in life?can it change if

>you are shy?also are there any tapes u can recommend for this,and how long

>does it take to work?thanks

>

Dear John

 

I am a relationship counsellor in New Zealand, and an advanced student of

NLP although not yet formally accredited as an NLP practitioner.

 

No tape or book or even another live person can change you or your " whole

personality " . Only you can. They are tools (or, in the case of humans,

" facilitators " ). If you cannot get that now it is my belief that you will

be disappointed.

 

Tapes can provide you with information and encouragement. I don't know of

any specific ones, but there are many around which may be based on NLP

principles. You cannot normally *learn* NLP just from books and tapes - it

is a detailed study and philosophy of human behaviour and much of it is

experiential.

 

No-one is genetically shy as far as we know. Shyness is a strategy or

learned behaviour, and it may or may not be useful for your healthy

survival. I pick that you would like to change that behaviour (when I work

with clients I tell them that I do not wish to change them even if I could

which I can't, and I see my role as supporting them to be themselves, not

someone else (which when you think about it is absurd). In other words I am

interested in facilitating an unlocking process. They provide the

personality - I don't prescribe it or give it to them in some mysterious way.

 

Although it is not impossible I have yet to see anyone make effective

changes in their behaviour on their own, so I would recommend to approach a

reputable cousellor/therapist in your locality (possibly but not

necessarily one with NLP training and certification). There is no

implication that you are mentally deficient if you engage in therapy; in

fact I think it is a smart thing to do in these circumstances.

 

Hope this helps - please let me have feedback

 

Bruce