WorldWideHealth: Mistaking Hunger

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Mistaking Hunger

http://www.worldwidehealth.com/article.php?id=268 & categoryID=88

 

By Caryl Ehrlich

01 February 2007

 

You are not hungry most of the time. You are not always hungry when

something smells, looks, or tastes good, whether or not you think

you are. All food is prepared to tempt your taste buds, even though

you're not hungry.

 

There are many daily food encounters. Acknowledging the visual and

emotional blitz helps interrupt the knee-jerk reaction that causes

you to eat even though you're not hungry. Just knowing you are not

hungry most of the time is a helpful piece of information.

 

You may even have pinpointed the reasons you're thinking of food,

reasons that seem to justify your eating when you're not hungry.

 

Certainly anger might tempt you to use food to keep the feelings

down. If you eat when you're angry, does the anger go away? Or

perhaps frustration weakens your resolve. At which point is your

threshold for discomfort seriously challenged? Bored? At exactly

which point does a yawn become a yen? Tired? When does food become a

replacement for sleep?

 

Does the emotional pain diminish when you eat? Is the celebration

any better because you come home stuffed, bloated, and full of gas,

uncomfortable and with lowered self-esteem? Is it worth it?

 

Of course it's possible that some discomfort might occur while

you're changing. The very act of weighing less than you did before

is a change. And there is no change without change. But there are

ways to lessen the discomfort of the journey from where you are to

where you want to be; to offer options, suggestions, tactics, tips,

tried and true assignments that work more and more as they are

practiced. After all, you learned to use food to calm yourself down.

You can learn a new method, a new automatic response.

 

Do you eat out of habit, not hunger? Identifying habits requires

guidance, introspection, and patience, but most of all honesty. Once

you acknowledge, " Yes, I do that, " you can decide you don't want to

do that anymore and begin to do something else, instead.

 

It is unrealistic and self-defeating to expect to go from habitual,

compulsive, or addictive eating behavior to a calm, rational, in-

control eating person by reading an article, even this article. You

can, however, alter automatic, learned responses by creating new and

effective alternative behaviors that will result in permanent

change.

 

Food does not contain a narcotic. Food only has the power you gave

it by doing the same thing with it each time you encountered it.

Food has the power you vested in it as part of a ritual distraction

with your mind, many times since childhood, when you might have

learned how to cope with stressful situations by using food

inappropriately. It might have worked then, but it's not working

now. Now you need to find a new way that will work now.

 

Hunger demands to be fed. An urge passes. Know the difference? The

next time you're at home and thinking of food, and you just ate a

little while before, set a kitchen timer for 20 minutes and distract

yourself with some activity. Sometimes I set the timer, get busy

with some other project, and when the bell goes off, I not only

forget I set the bell, I'm not even sure why I set it in the first

place.

 

If you do not eat something when you normally would have, you might

be particularly motivated to reach your goal weight for an upcoming

wedding, class reunion, or birthday celebration. If you use will

power, self-control, good intentions, and inner resolve, you'll find

the results temporary. The next time the same circumstances or food

appear, you may be a little less motivated or a little more angry,

lonely, tired, or bored, and you'll probably eat the food, only to

reinforce your old eating behavior, which is what caused you to gain

weight in the first place. There is no good intention, self-control,

inner resolve or will power sharp enough to cut through the layers

and tentacles of your very practiced and polished ritualized eating

habits - habits gone haywire. If you ever had good intention, self-

control, will power or inner resolve, you would have used it 5, 10,

20, 30, or 50 pounds ago.

 

If, however, you begin to change your overreaction to food by doing

something else, you might end up eating the object of your desire,

but, you'll most likely not put as much on your plate, you'll eat a

little less, stop a little sooner, and eat it a little less

intensely than if you had not attempted some repatterning techniques.

 

The first time you do it the new way, it might feel awkward and

uncomfortable. It is different from what you've done in the past.

But no matter how uncomfortable you feel at the beginning of

creating a new habit, nothing is as uncomfortable as having to

choose what to wear based on how much of your body it will cover.

Nothing is as uncomfortable as selecting what to wear based on what

fits on a particular day rather than what is appropriate for a

particular occasion.

 

Maintain a positive, I can do it mental attitude, and positive

results happen. Avoid negative words about yourself, such as bad or

failure or I blew it. They are just words and do not apply to anyone

who continues to try.

 

For best results, attempt many kinds of change in your life. If

drinking water doesn't help by itself, perhaps the water and deep

breathing will be helpful. Sometimes water, deep breathing, changing

location and calling a friend is what you need. It is the action of

taking an action - any action - that gets the result. It almost

doesn't matter which techniques you use to repattern - what is

important is that you take a swift, purposeful, and immediate

action. The quicker the action, the quicker the moment of anxiety

passes.

 

It is possible that sometimes you might try every technique

available and the moment is still difficult. It happens. But that

doesn't mean you should stop trying. It just means your results have

not quite accumulated enough to effect a noticeable change. It

doesn't mean nothing is happening. It just might be too subtle for

you to notice. Keep doing it anyway. It accumulates. Continue

trying, and from each seemingly failed, imperfect human attempt, the

structure of the old, destructive habit will be eroded another

little bit . . . you will be that much closer to success which is

eating only when hungry.

 

Sometimes one technique works, sometimes another. Every food

encounter is different from every other one. Everyone responds to

each stimulus differently and responds to repatterning techniques in

a different way, too. A combination of several techniques may be

just the ticket when one is not enough. Be creative.

 

Identify your eating patterns. Even the seemingly insignificant

ones, such as it's only broccoli, or I only drink black coffee add

up. Do you mean an orange has the same significance as a piece of

candy? What ritual thinking is in your subconscious? Are leftovers a

problem? Does food preparation end up being one for you and one for

the pot? Does someone else serve you your food at home, in the

office, in a restaurant? Do you finish everything served to you?

 

If you buy, prepare, serve, and accept a little less food, you'll

eat less. Ultimately, you'll be a little less.

 

If you don't bring it into the house you won't eat it. Out of sight,

out of mind.If it doesn't taste good or look good or satisfy the eye

and palate, don't eat it. We all belong to a nation of people who

finish everything on their plate. That is not necessary. You may

leave food over. It's okay. Food is wasted if you put it into a body

that doesn't need it. Better to throw it away. If you order less the

next time, there will be less to waste.

 

When you go off your program because you're human, you didn't blow

it, weren't bad, or a failure. Don't beat yourself up. Simply get

back on your program at the very next meal. Try to figure out what

you could do next time the same thing inevitably happens. The

quicker you're back on your program, the more you'll want to stay on

your program. It is becoming comfortable, enjoyable, and preferred

behavior.

 

Think of things you can do if you're thinking about eating but know

you're not hungry.

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Author: Caryl Ehrlich

 

This article is an excerpt from the book Conquer Your Food Addiction

published by Simon and Schuster. Caryl Ehrlich, the author, also

teaches The Caryl Ehrlich Program, a one-on-one behavioral approach

to weight loss in New York City.