Guest guest Posted December 22, 2004 Report Share Posted December 22, 2004 Re parent's comment: Now see my situation was quite the opposite. I knew heart, body and soul that my child had ADHD and the school was COMPLETELY uncooperative. They refused to accept it. They refused to do the testing that I wanted. They refused to give him a 504 plan. All I got was " he just needs a spanking " or " he's just lazy " and " there's no such thing as ADHD " . Diagnosing a Problem Child Diagnosing emotional, learning and behavior problems is very difficult and requires spending time with the child in a variety of everyday situations, the kind of experience that typically only a parent would have. That’s why school workers, who really don’t know the child and do not themselves have experience with learning disorders, often assume that the learning problems are related to poor parenting or lack of discipline. The behavior of the child could be due to the distress of not keeping up with the class. If the educators have the occasion to work with the child for a year, they begin to understand that, perhaps, there is some real physical learning disability or other problem. By that time the child could be moving to a new grade and new teacher. It often takes years to pinpoint a problem. The variety of intelligence and language processing tests available to attempt to understand the problem may not be covered by the parent’s insurance plan. Further, some professionals may try to steer the family towards counseling or medication, not understanding that the child could have a real physical disability and special needs. Also, there are just not ways to diagnose or fully understand many of these disabilities. For example, autism can exist in a range of related disabilities and degrees of difficulties. There is no clear understanding of any of these mental/visual/auditory/sensory-related problems. Unfortunately, the plan to have the teacher support special needs through special instruction is often not practical. Such a plan is often unrealistic in a large class or when the teacher has over a hundred students in the course of a day. Such time-consuming support may seem like ridiculous babying to a teacher who has never “walked a mile in those shoes” and thinks the child just needs punishment. Special Education is often the only service which provides an environment small enough and quiet enough for the child to succeed. Unfortunately, there is a stigma associated with Special Education and sometimes-poor programs. Some Special Education programs are excellent, but there is always the problem of stigma. Where else can you find a class size that allows the at-risk child to function? It’s area l dilemma in the antiquated and rigid school format. If a child has a reading or listening glitch in their mental make up, they could study a list of spelling words for hours but still miss most of the words a week after taking the test. They could be an early reader but never enjoy reading or read proficiently because their eyes literally do not process some of the letters or they skip lines, causing one to continually lose his place. If the child does not process heard language, he may block out the communications going on around him, the ones everyone else is naturally tuning into and learning from. It turns out the child has no idea what month it is, his address, has a vocabulary of a small child, and doesn’t know much of what the average person absorbs through listening. The above children could be above average in intelligence and capability in other areas. All of this complexity makes it very hard for strangers to get involved in evaluating a person’s child. One parent, whose child had diagnosed language processing problems which were leading to a lot of stress in school and related discipline problems was told by a social worker, “Well, it took a lifetime for him to become like this, so we are not going to straighten out the situation overnight.” Other parents have been blamed for their autistic child’s anti-social behavior even though the parent points out that the other children in the family are just fine. Unfortunately, even if a parent is able to have his or her child tested, there are not adequate tests to diagnose the myriad of small glitches that can lead to learning problems. Frankly, we don’t understand what causes these problems and have no real cures. There is evidence that the movement of crawling is essential to the development of certain learning pathways. If you catch the child young enough, such therapies often help. If you have babies, encourage them to crawl around as much as possible. Other research points to the damage caused to small children by fixating the eyes on a television screen. Obviously parents are challenged in a city setting to allow the kind of movements that seem to be essential to brain development. Other areas to examine have to do with nutrition and allergies. Some parents try everything to help their child with ADD. Unfortunately, families are working against a culture which glamorizes prepared snacks with corn syrup, monosodium glutamate, refined sugars, hydrogenated fats. It is next to impossible to prevent a child from eating such foods unless you want to lock him in a large monkey cage (which has probably crossed more than one parent’s mind) Some parents forbid their children from eating candy only to have the child stop by at a convenience store to stock up on candy before coming home. Fortunately snacks have become somewhat more health conscious, but there is still a huge problem in this area with little school or societal support for the child’s needs. Some learning aids include providing books on tape for a child who struggles to read, providing puzzles and other building games such as tinker toys to develop problem solving skills, enrollment in a variety of sports activities. Sometimes the only thing that works is to home school the child and provide a personal study program based on his particular needs. Learning supply stores provide everything a parent needs, and most communities have homeschooling support groups. Unfortunately, the public school culture encourages other students to scorn homeschoolers, and it is often hard for a homeschooler to be accepted into a group of public school children. For example, on a sports team the homeschooler may be with a group of students who all attend the same school and have formed a somewhat insular social group. Christians have built fairly large networks of homeschooling groups, classes, and recreational programs. Some counties have set up homeschooling projects which connect to students through the computer. These programs are not suitable for all learning styles. A parent with a learning disabled child will anguish for years with the problem. Sometimes the family must insist that its child be considered for special Ed in order to get any kind of real support. What we need is a society where neighbors show love and affection to children, perhaps chatting with the children and becoming mentors to the child in a small ways. Just having caring neighbors who are supportive rather than condemning can do a great deal to help a family struggling with an at-risk child. Unfortunately drugs such as Ritalin and Prozac, while tried in desperation, do not work or only work temporarily. They rapidly become more of a problem than a cure, especially when the child comes down off of the drug at the end of the day. There are no easy solutions to these problems. I personally believe that parents should receive small stipends (not just families on welfare) for small children so there is some money available to pay for the kinds of supplementary activities and tutoring children may need. When a child is failing in school or socially, it can be assured that the fact will be noticed by the family and the school. Bi-annual psychological tests are not necessary. The solution is not to spy on and search for problems in every member of society or to pretend that there is a simple chemical solution for a myriad of problems which could be contributing to the child’s lack of success. Life takes a lot of work, a lot of trial and error, a lot of caring and time. Any mother who has changed thousands of diapers and cut thousands of small finger and toenails can attest to this reality. There are really no short cuts or quick fixes. Sometimes, after years of searching and struggle, the family learns their child is dyslexic and will probably never enjoy reading or be able to skim a book. He may need special support to attend college or vocational school which could include extra time to complete a test or taping class lectures, getting textbooks on cassette tape through Books for the Blind. Just when parents are ready to give up in despair, the adult child invents a great business idea, falls into a job just perfect for his needs, or meets a great secretary and settles down into a normal life. Often this happens once the child gets out of the public school and is allowed to lead a normal life. The amazing thing about people is they have a way of taking care of their own needs if you let them, and each person seems to have his own life plan. We need to give parents all the support and respect that we can and be humble enough to recognize that we don’t have all the answers, either. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 22, 2004 Report Share Posted December 22, 2004 Diagnosing a Problem Child Diagnosing emotional, learning and behavior problems is very difficult and requires spending time with the child in a variety of everyday situations, the kind of experience that typically only a parent would have. That’s why school workers, who really don’t know the child and do not themselves have experience with learning disorders, often assume that the learning problems are related to poor parenting or lack of discipline. The behavior of the child could be due to the distress of not keeping up with the class. If the educators have the occasion to work with the child for a year, they begin to understand that, perhaps, there is some real physical learning disability or other problem. By that time the child could be moving to a new grade and new teacher. It often takes years to pinpoint a problem. The variety of intelligence and language processing tests available to attempt to understand the problem may not be covered by the parent’s insurance plan. Further, some professionals may try to steer the family towards counseling or medication, not understanding that the child could have a real physical disability and special needs. Also, there are just not ways to diagnose or fully understand many of these disabilities. For example, autism can exist in a range of related disabilities and degrees of difficulties. There is no clear understanding of any of these mental/visual/auditory/sensory-related problems. Unfortunately, the plan to have the teacher support special needs through special instruction is often not practical. Such a plan is often unrealistic in a large class or when the teacher has over a hundred students in the course of a day. Such time-consuming support may seem like ridiculous babying to a teacher who has never “walked a mile in those shoes” and thinks the child just needs punishment. Special Education is often the only service which provides an environment small enough and quiet enough for the child to succeed. Unfortunately, there is a stigma associated with Special Education and sometimes-poor programs. Some Special Education programs are excellent, but there is always the problem of stigma. Where else can you find a class size that allows the at-risk child to function? It’s a dilemma in the antiquated and rigid school format. If a child has a reading or listening glitch in their mental make up, they could study a list of spelling words for hours but still miss most of the words a week after taking the test. They could be an early reader but never enjoy reading or read proficiently because their eyes literally do not process some of the letters or they skip lines, causing one to continually lose his place. If the child does not process heard language, he may block out the communications going on around him, the ones everyone else is naturally tuning into and learning from. It turns out the child has no idea what month it is, his address, has a vocabulary of a small child, and doesn’t know much of what the average person absorbs through listening. The above children could be above average in intelligence and capability in other areas. All of this complexity makes it very hard for strangers to get involved in evaluating a person’s child. One parent, whose child had diagnosed language processing problems which were leading to a lot of stress in school and related discipline problems was told by a social worker, “Well, it took a lifetime for him to become like this, so we are not going to straighten out the situation overnight.” Other parents have been blamed for their autistic child’s anti-social behavior even though the parent points out that the other children in the family are just fine. Unfortunately, even if a parent is able to have his or her child tested, there are not adequate tests to diagnose the myriad of small glitches that can lead to learning problems. Frankly, we don’t understand what causes these problems and have no real cures. There is evidence that the movement of crawling is essential to the development of certain learning pathways. If you catch the child young enough, such therapies often help. If you have babies, encourage them to crawl around as much as possible. Other research points to the damage caused to small children by fixating the eyes on a television screen. Obviously parents are challenged in a city setting to allow the kind of movements that seem to be essential to brain development. Other areas to examine have to do with nutrition and allergies. Some parents try everything to help their child with ADD. Unfortunately, families are working against a culture which glamorizes prepared snacks with corn syrup, monosodium glutamate, refined sugars, hydrogenated fats. It is next to impossible to prevent a child from eating such foods unless you want to lock him in a large monkey cage (which has probably crossed more than one parent’s mind) Some parents forbid their children from eating candy only to have the child stop by at a convenience store to stock up on candy before coming home. Fortunately snacks have become somewhat more health conscious, but there is still a huge problem in this area with little school or societal support for the child’s needs. Some learning aids include providing books on tape for a child who struggles to read, providing puzzles and other building games such as tinker toys to develop problem solving skills, enrollment in a variety of sports activities. Sometimes the only thing that works is to home school the child and provide a personal study program based on his particular needs. Learning supply stores provide everything a parent needs, and most communities have homeschooling support groups. Unfortunately, the public school culture encourages other students to scorn homeschoolers, and it is often hard for a homeschooler to be accepted into a group of public school children. For example, on a sports team the homeschooler may be with a group of students who all attend the same school and have formed a somewhat insular social group. Christians have built fairly large networks of homeschooling groups, classes, and recreational programs. Some counties have set up homeschooling projects which connect to students through the computer. These programs are not suitable for all learning styles. A parent with a learning disabled child will anguish for years with the problem. Sometimes the family must insist that its child be considered for Special Ed in order to get any kind of real support. What we need is a society where neighbors show love and affection to children, perhaps chatting with the children and becoming mentors to the child in a small ways. Just having caring neighbors who are supportive rather than condemning can do a great deal to help a family struggling with an at-risk child. Unfortunately drugs such as Ritalin and Prozac, while tried in desperation, do not work or only work temporarily. They rapidly become more of a problem than a cure, especially when the child comes down off of the drug at the end of the day. There are no easy solutions to these problems. I personally believe that parents should receive small stipends (not just families on welfare) for small children so there is some money available to pay for the kinds of supplementary activities and tutoring children may need. When a child is failing in school or socially, it can be assured that the fact will be noticed by the family and the school. Bi-annual psychological tests are not necessary. The solution is not to spy on and search for problems in every member of society or to pretend that there is a simple chemical solution for a myriad of problems which could be contributing to the child’s lack of success. Life takes a lot of work, a lot of trial and error, a lot of caring and time. Any mother who has changed thousands of diapers and cut thousands of small finger and toenails can attest to this reality. There are really no short cuts or quick fixes. Sometimes, after years of searching and struggle, the family learns their child is dyslexic and will probably never enjoy reading or be able to skim a book. He may need special support to attend college or vocational school which could include extra time to complete a test or taping class lectures, getting textbooks on cassette tape through Books for the Blind. Just when parents are ready to give up in despair, the adult child invents a great business idea, falls into a job just perfect for his needs, or meets a great secretary and settles down into a normal life. Often this happens once the child gets out of the public school and is allowed to lead a normal life. The amazing thing about people is they have a way of taking care of their own needs if you let them, and each person seems to have his own life plan. We need to give parents all the support and respect that we can and be humble enough to recognize that we don’t have all the answers, either. Mail - Find what you need with new enhanced search. http://info.mail./mail_250 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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