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The purpose of holy marriage

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Marriage should be based on love,mercy and cooperation

 

" ... He created for you mates from among yourselves, that ye may dwell in

tranquility with them, and He has put love and mercy between your (hearts):... "

 

Living in Tranquility with Love, Mercy and Mutual Cooperation and Consultation

is the purpose of the holy marriage.

 

A marital relationship is conducted based on love and mercy so as to achieve

peace both within ourselves and with our partner. We should strive

conscientiously to make our home a Heaven (Abode of Peace). A peaceful and

loving home is truly a pleasure to return to after a hard day's work. Imagine

being greeted with a warm smile, a kiss and soothing words to ease your frazzled

nerves. Even the most ordinary meal shared with your spouse becomes the

highlight of the day if it is served with care and enjoyed in peaceful

companionship.

 

Subsequently, having peace within the family will enable us to find Peace with

our Creator.To facilitate the task of building a harmonious marriage, it is

essential that both spouses adopt a forgiving and merciful attitude which will

enable them to put aside each other's mistakes, focusing instead on their

strengths and their efforts to change. Helping each other is a crucial step in

actualizing our desire to have a tranquil home. We should adopt a charitable

attitude by assisting to remove any difficulties that our partner may encounter

and anticipate his or her needs, trying to fulfill them without being asked.

Each partner should look forward to being of assistance to the other. Such an

attitude will create the impression of putting our partner's needs beside our

own, serving to express the love and concern that we have for one another.

 

One simple way to help one another is to try to make things easier for each

other. " Make things easy and convenient and do not make them harsh and difficult.

Give cheers and glad tidings and do not create hatred... " )

 

Throughout our marriage we will be adjusting to each other's expectations and

needs. This is to be expected because, as an individual develops and changes

throughout their life, the dynamics of their relationship with their spouse will

be affected. Adjustments will be most intensive during the early par: of the

marriage. Thus, it is crucial that both parties adopt an attitude of making

things easy for each other.

 

The couple should not cause inconvenience to each other, and the family members

should not be unnecessarily 'pressurized',

 

When the marital relationship is conducted based on helping each other, the

couple will develop mutual cooperation in their dealings. This could range from

helping your partner when he or she is in financial need, to doing chores. The

organization of the household, although seemingly mundane, can become a source

of stress and inconvenience. A couple can actually quarrel over matters as

simple as not putting the toothbrush in the right place! Therefore, we should

never discount the importance of the management of our daily necessities.

Although traditionally the wife is expected to manage the household, she may not

be able to cope, especially if she is both working and having to care for the

children. Not to offer help is like treading on thin ice.

 

Therefore, we are advised to manage our household based on mutual co-operation.

We have to deal with his wives most supportivelyby helping out with chores. All

these were done with the clear understanding of mutually maintaining a home

environment that would be conducive towards the attainment of peace.

 

 

The principle of consultation, which is used to conduct all affairs, be they

private domestic matters, business matters or affairs of state, is derived from

the following verse : " Those who hearken to their Lord, and establish regular

prayer; who (conduct) their affairs by mutual Consultation; who spend out of

what We bestow on them for Sustenance; "

 

Husband and wife are each other's best companions and advisers, complementing

one another in their various roles within the family. A wife who acts as an

adviser to her husband shares her views when consulted by him. A husband can

count on his wife's knowledge and expertise when he asks for them. By consulting

one another or seeking each other's views we can better understand an issue or

problem and will be better advised in generating a solution.Being able to

conduct our family life with love, mercy and mutual cooperation and consultation

will open the doors for the couple to develop tranquility within their home.

11:40 AM 5/25/2009

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