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My journal: a wake up song - a welcome call

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I didn't wake up with a dream, but I woke up with a song in my heart - the next best thing to a dream. And if the song is

"O come all ye faithful, joyful and triumphant,

Come ye, O come ye to Bethlehem",

to me it practically seemed like an invitation from Swami to come to Puttaparthi, His Bethlehem.

 

Ma has been asking me to come, but I keep putting her off, saying I'll come when Swami calls me. And even though I've been joking that the laddus and sweets I hear He's been giving out seem like invitations enough to me, I've seriously been waiting for a sign, and this seems it!

 

The last time I went was almost 3 years ago and Swami had seemed remote and distant. I had prayed for particular things and specific outcomes, and when they didn't happen, I just assumed He wasn't listening. I went, I saw, I came back - nothing changed.

 

To change a habit, they say, takes 21 days; to change a job, may be a few months; to change one's life, may be a few years; and to change oneself, a few lifetimes. All in good time. All in God's time. It was silly and childish of me to assign specific times and outcomes for what I was requesting to be changed.

 

My situation hasn't changed. But the way I look at my situation has changed. I think this is the change Swami makes happen - a transformation from the inside out. Because changing things on the outside will not change the inside. If the inside changed, nothing needs to change on the outside, or so it seems, but that's when I'm actually opening up and being receptive to change - any change. Not the changes I want, but to accept whatever comes to me.

 

That's what this past year has seemed to me - a change from the inside. A change I hadn't asked for, or expected, but I accepted it, and life hasn't been the same since. It's been nothing short of joyful and triumphant. So the time seems ripe for another trip to Prashanti Nilayam, when I'm not going with secret desires or specific boons, but to -

Come and behold him, born the king of angels

And to go and adore Him, Sai, my Lord.

 

This was a song I had learned in school, probably as part of some Christmas celebrations - to sing to Swami if He came by on a surprise visit - we always used to prepare and hope for his surprise visits. I haven't thought of it in years! It's so sweet now that He used it to convey such a sweet message to me. And now, the song keeps singing itself over and over in my head. I can't wait to go visit Him, behold Him, adore Him!

 

Sai Ram and Love

sai_sravanthi_999

 

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