Devotion’ is nothing but ‘Bhakti’

[Guest guest]

Sai Ram Swamy Mahadevan ji,

Glad to read this posting. How miraculous it is

that it seems as if I have written my own story?!?!?!?

(except the incident of loosing son...)

May we all remain blessed by BABA and get more and

more understanding BABA to improve our time here on

Earth.

Take care,

Meera Bakshi,AZ, USA.

--- swamy mahadevan <mahadevanvnswamy

wrote:

 

> DEVOTION is nothing but Bhakti

>

> I am a simple person and at first instant I feel

> ‘Devotion’ is nothing but ‘Bhakti’. However,

> thinking

> seriously I feel that though ‘devotion’ sounds such

> a

> simple word but it is so profound and has such deep

> meaning that after looking up all dictionaries on

> the

> Web, I am still not sure whether I got the true

> meaning of this one single and simple word namely

> ‘Devotion’.

>

> One could say that devotion is ‘pure unconditional

> love without expecting any return’ like a mother is

> devoted to her child, a wife is devoted to her

> husband

> and a son/ daughter is devoted to his/ her parents.

> And then there is devotion of a Bhakta to his/her

> deity. This devotion is so very different from the

> aforementioned devotion because a Bhakta worships

> his

> God with the belief that he exists and is taking

> care

> of him without even a single meeting with the God. I

> consider myself as a Shirdi Sai Baba devotee and am

> still trying to learn right method of devotion. To

> me,

> Devotion means - my relationship with SaiBaba, which

> has developed over the years.

>

> When I was a child, I had this fascination for a

> particular filmstar. I would leave all my work and

> rush to TV every time his movie or song was being

> telecast. I thought I was so crazily devoted to this

> actor. Then suddenly one day I felt disgust at my

> behaviour and a thought came into my mind. Why am I

> wasting my time, energy and thoughts on a person I

> don’t know and haven’t even met. Simultaneously, I

> thought that if I could be even half as crazy for

> God

> Almighty, as I am for this actor, then I would be so

> lucky.

>

> I remember as a kid, I had to accompany my parents

> to

> Shiva temple everyday, which I did not like. But

> today

> I am very thankful to them for showing me the right

> path at such an early age. When I got married my

> husband would take me to Saibaba Lodhi Road temple.

> I

> would bow my head down before Baba and silently talk

> to him ‘Baba I don’t know anything about you. I am

> coming here to you because my husband is coming

> here.

> If I could know something more about you and your

> Leelas then things would be different’.

>

> Luckily, after a few days, we had guests in our

> home,

> who spoke about Baba so lovingly and also discussed

> their experiences of reading ‘Sai Satcharita’.

> Internally, I wanted to have this book. I found one

> brand new Sai Satcharita in our home library itself.

> I

> read it in seven days and my life changed altogether

> thereafter. This was Baba’s first response to my

> sprouting ‘devotion’.

>

> I felt myself drawn towards Shirdi Sai Baba. I felt

> Shiva, Krishna, Durga, Ganapathi, Hanuman – all are

> in

> Sai and Sai is in all. I understood meaning of

> ‘Oneness of Gods’. I became ‘devoted’ to Sai and

> started visiting Baba temples, read material

> available

> on him. I just started loving Baba. Once I saw a

> beautiful Saibaba murti left by a devotee under a

> Peepal tree outside the temple because it was

> slightly

> damaged (one portion of middle finger was broken and

> base of stone on which Baba was sitting was slightly

> chipped off). I just could not stop myself. I picked

> up the Murti, hugged it and brought it home and kept

> it in my temple. If I were to suffer a fracture my

> family won’t discard me.

>

> So what one devotee discarded as inauspicious became

> a

> very auspicious blessing for another devotee. Does

> devotion have different meanings for different

> devotees? I am blessed that Murti is still in my

> home

> and I can feel the change. Earlier Baba’s face

> looked

> grim but over the years, the murti has got luster

> and

> a smile on His face. I am very attached to that

> Murti.

> I feel immense peace when I hug this Murti in my

> good

> as well as bad times. I talk to the Murti as if Baba

> were alive in this Murti. Today it is placed at a

> prime place in my living room because I consider

> Saibaba as a family member- the head of the family.

> Sometimes I wonder if this is devotion or a crazy

> act.

>

> One day I wanted to visit Saibaba temple very

> earnestly and requested my elder son to take care of

> his younger brother for at least one hour so than I

> could go to the temple. He agreed but also added

> ‘SaiBaba is in your Home Maa. Why do you need to go

> to

> temple’. Something hit me that day in those innocent

> words. I thought my ‘devotion’ towards Baba was

> actually ritualistic. Baba is inside me I just have

> to

> look inward and I’ll find Shirdi & Baba all inside

> me.

> I am also part and parcel of that ‘Oneness of

> Universe’. Thus Baba was working on me internally.

>

> And Why not, even Baba has said that there is no

> distinction between God, Guru and Devotee. Now

> ‘devotion’ had another meaning for me – True love

> for

> Baba and considering the whole creation as Baba. I

> soon realized it was easier said than done. Though I

> could now compose and sing Baba’s Bhajans,

> participate

> in his Satsang but internally I was still expecting

> a

> response from Baba in some form or the other. Not

> that

> Baba was not responding. Baba always responded but

> sometimes when I did not understand this response I

> would feel Baba is not looking at me.

>

> All in all I was expecting Baba’s response in return

> to my devotion. I was praying to God, thanking him

> but

> was also seeking favours in return because I always

> felt that I was a good devotee - going to God in

> good

> times and not bothering him during my bad times. I

> was

> exercising choice, discrimination in my ‘devotion’

> to

> Baba. But still my internal communication with Baba

> continued. I conversed with Baba almost most of the

> day. I always felt him beside me and I was so

> satisfied in this feeling that I thought with Baba

> around me nothing can go wrong. Baba is the

> protector.

> After all, I was not seeking ‘big’ favours from him

> anymore. I thought I may not be the best devotee of

> Saibaba but still I was a good devotee.

>

> Then came the biggest jolt in my life, a real test

> of

> my devotion, an eye (internal) opener. I lost my

> older

> son (18 years) in a sudden road accident. A few days

> before his passing Baba had appeared in my dream

> lying

> on the ground with a white cloth covering his body.

> I

> found my son’s lifeless body in similar position in

> the AIIMS mortuary. What was Baba trying to tell me?

> Suddenly, I felt my whole devotion had gone for a

> toss. It was so very painful for me. I could think

> of

> nothing but my lost son and my feeling of utter

> despair at my big loss. Where was my ‘devotion’? I

> was

> complaining. Why did Baba not save him?

>

> And did Baba respond? Yes. All the way. I feel him

> much more closer to me now. I started reading

> material

> available on afterlife, NDEs, ADCs etc. As I got

> more

> and more insight into my tragedy I felt foolish for

> blaming Baba for this mishap in my life. Sai

> Satcharita is full of stories about Prarabdha and

> now

> I was actually understanding their meaning.

> Practical

> was absolutely different from theory.

>

> This ‘pain’ and ‘separation’ from my son awakened me

> to an entirely new understanding of soul (me),

> spirit

> (Baba) and spirituality which I had understood only

> at

> intellectual level till now. Baba gave me answers to

> all my queries through so many methods including

> visions and dream visits. I was seeing my life in

> bits

>

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