Guest guest Posted August 17, 2008 Report Share Posted August 17, 2008 Namah Shivaya, After seeing Amma this summer I have had intense longing for her. After my sat sang last night I began to feel the pangs of the 'Spiritual' where I can immerse myself in the divine ending and the 'real world' where I need to engage mentally beginning. I keep thinking these past few weeks " Amma, how do I live in the world when all I do is long for you? " Then I think of the swami's; they live in the spiritual world, Amma sends them out in the world, but they are not living the worldly life. Somehow they are able to operate. So then I think how can I get to this point? Severe austerities such as they have surely gone through? I can't do this. My dharma is to be a mother at this time...........but my heart aches and longs solely for Amma. So much so that at times I want to drop what I am doing like I have been burned on the hand and run to her. Sometimes I feel that I can't function in the world/work/life etc. All I can think about is her. The longing becomes so intense. Amma has answered this to a degree: Slowly slowly O mind, everything in own pace happens Gardner may water a hundred buckets, fruit arrives only in its season First the pangs of separation Next grows the thirst for Love I had an experience in Dallas two or three years ago after a darshan from Amma. After wards I cried intensely for her, so intense in fact that I was crying over and over " Ammmmaaaaaa...Ammmmmaaaaa... Ammmaaaaaa.... " It was so intense and so uncontrollable that I was on the verge of calling out to her vocally.... somehow my mind was able to think and was appalled that I would express myself like this out loud, my mind and heart were two seprate entities, truly, and my mind and heart were physically fighting against each other and after a bit it calmed.... It was defiantly something Amma planted deep within... it was coming somewhere so deep within me that I had NO IDEA there were that many layers underneath... It was unexplainable and awing. I will never forget it. Although I am not on that level of longing as I was that day.... it is getting pretty intense and when the waves come as they have been since seeing Amma this summer... all I can do is cry and long some more and think of her... it is a struggle to get my mind to focus on daily tasks. How does one do that? Although I know Mother is with me, knowing this and even feeling that she is with me is still not enough for this heart. I still feel the insense longing to be WITH her. Any advise? R. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 18, 2008 Report Share Posted August 18, 2008 Namah Shivaya R :-) As I go through my day, I imagine seeing Amma everywhere. The more I do this, the more visible She becomes. When I meditate in the morning, I hear a bird outside my window and I imagine it is my own beloved Amma watching over me. As I walk into the doors at my office, another bird beckons from far off and again, I think of Amma being with me, watching over me. As I walk at work to my breakroom, bhajans are in my mind and I see Amma, all in white, rushing towards me. Just try to do all of your daily tasks with devotion and concentration. Perform all work as an offering to Amma. This way, by simply always remembering Her, you will begin to feel less of a separation. Eventually, you will come to feel Her around you all the time. Constant rememberance of our beloved is Her way of creating the longing for our own spiritual development. It is Her GOAL to have us think of Her always and eventually to realize how She resides within us. Singing bhajans I find also is very comforting and also makes me feel Amma around me. She is after all, everywhere. love Adriane Ammachi , ammapoet <ammapoet wrote: > > > Namah Shivaya, > > After seeing Amma this summer I have had intense longing for her. > > > After my sat sang last night I began to feel the pangs of the 'Spiritual' where I can immerse myself in the divine ending and the 'real world' where I need to engage mentally beginning. I keep thinking these past few weeks " Amma, how do I live in the world when all I do is long for you? " Then I think of the swami's; they live in the spiritual world, Amma sends them out in the world, but they are not living the worldly life. Somehow they are able to operate. So then I think how can I get to this point? Severe austerities such as they have surely gone through? I can't do this. My dharma is to be a mother at this time...........but my heart aches and longs solely for Amma. So much so that at times I want to drop what I am doing like I have been burned on the hand and run to her. Sometimes I feel that I can't function in the world/work/life etc. All I can think about is her. The longing becomes so intense. > > Amma has answered this to a degree: > > Slowly slowly O mind, everything in own pace happens > Gardner may water a hundred buckets, fruit arrives only in its season > > First the pangs of separation > Next grows the thirst for Love > > > > I had an experience in Dallas two or three years ago after a darshan from Amma. After wards I cried intensely for her, so intense in fact that I was crying over and over " Ammmmaaaaaa...Ammmmmaaaaa... Ammmaaaaaa.... " It was so intense and so uncontrollable that I was on the verge of calling out to her vocally.... somehow my mind was able to think and was appalled that I would express myself like this out loud, my mind and heart were two seprate entities, truly, and my mind and heart were physically fighting against each other and after a bit it calmed.... It was defiantly something Amma planted deep within... it was coming somewhere so deep within me that I had NO IDEA there were that many layers underneath... It was unexplainable and awing. I will never forget it. > > Although I am not on that level of longing as I was that day.... it is getting pretty intense and when the waves come as they have been since seeing Amma this summer... all I can do is cry and long some more and think of her... it is a struggle to get my mind to focus on daily tasks. How does one do that? > > Although I know Mother is with me, knowing this and even feeling that she is with me is still not enough for this heart. I still feel the insense longing to be WITH her. > Any advise? > > R. > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 18, 2008 Report Share Posted August 18, 2008 Blessings dear one, all i might add is the One that creates, is the One that sustains, and the One that sustains is the One that dissolves. And they are all happening in the Now. They are All Amma, and She is the One that is leading. She is the One that will lifts you to heaven and drown you in the sweet hell of longing or hell/hell of abandonment, and the whole while She will be breathing your very breath. Your heart knows the way home, and you can trust it and Amma, for you are both already there together. Kindred Sister, we walk with such a powerful, and capable One and pray you can relax in gentleness and assurance of Her love. Aum Amrteswaryai Namaha marci **************Looking for a car that's sporty, fun and fits in your budget? Read reviews on AOL Autos. (http://autos.aol.com/cars-Volkswagen-Jetta-2009/expert-review?ncid=aolaut000300\ 00000007 ) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 18, 2008 Report Share Posted August 18, 2008 this devotion is so sweet.please keep sharing beloved sister. Ammachi: a1driane: Mon, 18 Aug 2008 04:56:52 +0000 Re: Intense longing... Namah Shivaya R :-)As I go through my day, I imagine seeing Amma everywhere. The more I do this, the more visible She becomes. When I meditate in the morning, I hear a bird outside my window and I imagine it is my own beloved Amma watching over me. As I walk into the doors at my office, another bird beckons from far off and again, I think of Amma being with me, watching over me. As I walk at work to my breakroom, bhajans are in my mind and I see Amma, all in white, rushing towards me. Just try to do all of your daily tasks with devotion and concentration. Perform all work as an offering to Amma. This way, by simply always remembering Her, you will begin to feel less of a separation. Eventually, you will come to feel Her around you all the time. Constant rememberance of our beloved is Her way of creating the longing for our own spiritual development. It is Her GOAL to have us think of Her always and eventually to realize how She resides within us. Singing bhajans I find also is very comforting and also makes me feel Amma around me. She is after all, everywhere.loveAdriane--- In Ammachi , ammapoet <ammapoet wrote:>> > Namah Shivaya,> > After seeing Amma this summer I have had intense longing for her. > > > After my sat sang last night I began to feel the pangs of the 'Spiritual' where I can immerse myself in the divine ending and the 'real world' where I need to engage mentally beginning. I keep thinking these past few weeks " Amma, how do I live in the world when all I do is long for you? " Then I think of the swami's; they live in the spiritual world, Amma sends them out in the world, but they are not living the worldly life. Somehow they are able to operate. So then I think how can I get to this point? Severe austerities such as they have surely gone through? I can't do this. My dharma is to be a mother at this time...........but my heart aches and longs solely for Amma. So much so that at times I want to drop what I am doing like I have been burned on the hand and run to her. Sometimes I feel that I can't function in the world/work/life etc. All I can think about is her. The longing becomes so intense. > > Amma has answered this to a degree:> > Slowly slowly O mind, everything in own pace happens> Gardner may water a hundred buckets, fruit arrives only in its season> > First the pangs of separation> Next grows the thirst for Love> > > > I had an experience in Dallas two or three years ago after a darshan from Amma. After wards I cried intensely for her, so intense in fact that I was crying over and over " Ammmmaaaaaa...Ammmmmaaaaa... Ammmaaaaaa.... " It was so intense and so uncontrollable that I was on the verge of calling out to her vocally.... somehow my mind was able to think and was appalled that I would express myself like this out loud, my mind and heart were two seprate entities, truly, and my mind and heart were physically fighting against each other and after a bit it calmed.... It was defiantly something Amma planted deep within... it was coming somewhere so deep within me that I had NO IDEA there were that many layers underneath... It was unexplainable and awing. I will never forget it. > > Although I am not on that level of longing as I was that day.... it is getting pretty intense and when the waves come as they have been since seeing Amma this summer... all I can do is cry and long some more and think of her... it is a struggle to get my mind to focus on daily tasks. How does one do that?> > Although I know Mother is with me, knowing this and even feeling that she is with me is still not enough for this heart. I still feel the insense longing to be WITH her. > Any advise?> > R.> > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 22, 2008 Report Share Posted August 22, 2008 Getting the Amma doll might be a good substitute for actually being with her. YS Ammachi , ammapoet <ammapoet wrote: > > > Namah Shivaya, > > After seeing Amma this summer I have had intense longing for her. > > > After my sat sang last night I began to feel the pangs of the 'Spiritual' where I can immerse myself in the divine ending and the 'real world' where I need to engage mentally beginning. I keep thinking these past few weeks " Amma, how do I live in the world when all I do is long for you? " Then I think of the swami's; they live in the spiritual world, Amma sends them out in the world, but they are not living the worldly life. Somehow they are able to operate. So then I think how can I get to this point? Severe austerities such as they have surely gone through? I can't do this. My dharma is to be a mother at this time...........but my heart aches and longs solely for Amma. So much so that at times I want to drop what I am doing like I have been burned on the hand and run to her. Sometimes I feel that I can't function in the world/work/life etc. All I can think about is her. The longing becomes so intense. > > Amma has answered this to a degree: > > Slowly slowly O mind, everything in own pace happens > Gardner may water a hundred buckets, fruit arrives only in its season > > First the pangs of separation > Next grows the thirst for Love > > > > I had an experience in Dallas two or three years ago after a darshan from Amma. After wards I cried intensely for her, so intense in fact that I was crying over and over " Ammmmaaaaaa...Ammmmmaaaaa... Ammmaaaaaa.... " It was so intense and so uncontrollable that I was on the verge of calling out to her vocally.... somehow my mind was able to think and was appalled that I would express myself like this out loud, my mind and heart were two seprate entities, truly, and my mind and heart were physically fighting against each other and after a bit it calmed.... It was defiantly something Amma planted deep within... it was coming somewhere so deep within me that I had NO IDEA there were that many layers underneath... It was unexplainable and awing. I will never forget it. > > Although I am not on that level of longing as I was that day.... it is getting pretty intense and when the waves come as they have been since seeing Amma this summer... all I can do is cry and long some more and think of her... it is a struggle to get my mind to focus on daily tasks. How does one do that? > > Although I know Mother is with me, knowing this and even feeling that she is with me is still not enough for this heart. I still feel the insense longing to be WITH her. > Any advise? > > R. > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 24, 2008 Report Share Posted August 24, 2008 Ammachi , " yogasidh " <yogasidh wrote: > > Getting the Amma doll might be a good substitute for actually being > with her. > YS > > Ammachi , ammapoet <ammapoet@> wrote: > > > > � > > Namah Shivaya, > > � > > After seeing Amma this summer I have had�intense longing for her. � > > � OM AMRTESVARYAI NAMAH! Namaskarams....... this is a very good sign...it indicates a certain amount of openness to Amma's Presence....this is what She wants from us...to have this intense longing to be with Her....with that kind of longing Mother can work on us more easily from a " distance " ...although for such as She, distance is meaningless...only for us does it seem that She is far away...as far as She is concerned, She says that She is always with us, in our hearts....in a way, this longing to be with Amma is really an indication of Her loving presence in our hearts, a blessing.... before we met Amma, She was already in our hearts, but in the brief meeting (of these three dimensional bodies), wherein She chanted those loving words in our ears, She transmits even MORE of Her presence, even more of Her Sakti to our hearts, so that the Amma in our hearts is further awakened and triggers this intense longing.... Rumi had a discussion or argument with the Lord one day, wherein he complained that he had been lovingly calling the Lord, his Beloved for so many years, crying and calling, calling and crying out the Lord's beloved name, but that the Lord had never even ONCE answered his (Rumi's) calls...and why was that? the Lord answered him saying that indeed the calling out for Him and the crying out His beloved Name, and the tears themselves ARE the Lord's response to the Loving Heart's call by Rumi.... however, many of the devotees are still unable to profit by that revelation in any real way...other than intellectual " understanding " of what it " means " dictionarywise, rather than life experiencewise. in short, even " knowing " that Amma is living in our own hearts as ourselves essentially means very little for us in our daily rounds, unless......the knowing is NOT an intellectual knowing, but rather an experiential knowing, a knowing of the whole body, especially the heart. thus for many devotees an Amma doll could be very helpful as a 'real-life' focus for that longing, that heartache....however, it doesn't really substitute for the real darshan...nothing could...until and if one gets darshan on the inside....and even then, there is something special about that Loving Hug from our Mother.... anyways.....i would agree that the Amma doll can be a very good help for those with a longing heart....unless they have plenty of money or tickets to India.... in Amma's Divine Love, and in Her Service as ever, your own self, visvanathan Om Amrtesvaryai Namah! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 2, 2008 Report Share Posted September 2, 2008 The longing is extremely painful and it is a great blessing. Amma is burning away your karma with that yearning. Indeed, Amma dolls are wonderful When Amma blesses them she puts herself there. Animals respond to my Amma doll! Dogs bark at it as they do an intruder. They know that's no toy! Blessedly, only on a few occasions when I have been in great angusih, I have held that doll and sobbed and sobbed. Recently, I had some strange fear, just suddenly, at 3 in the morning, for several nights, too many, in a row. I held the Amma doll and said my mantra furiously. The intellect knows nothing is going on that is really dangerous, but the old limbic brain, the lizard brain, still perfectly alive in all of us, was in terror. How know what that's all about but I was glad to have Amma in her doll form nearby. Aikya Ammachi , " yogasidh " <yogasidh wrote: > > Getting the Amma doll might be a good substitute for actually being > with her. > YS > > Ammachi , ammapoet <ammapoet@> wrote: > > > > > > Namah Shivaya, > > > > After seeing Amma this summer I have had intense longing for her. > > > > > > After my sat sang last night I began to feel the pangs of the > 'Spiritual' where I can immerse myself in the divine ending and the > 'real world' where I need to engage mentally beginning. I keep > thinking these past few weeks " Amma, how do I live in the world when > all I do is long for you? " Then I think of the swami's; they live in > the spiritual world, Amma sends them out in the world, but they are > not living the worldly life. Somehow they are able to operate. So then > I think how can I get to this point? Severe austerities such as they > have surely gone through? I can't do this. My dharma is to be a mother > at this time...........but my heart aches and longs solely for Amma. > So much so that at times I want to drop what I am doing like I have > been burned on the hand and run to her. Sometimes I feel that I can't > function in the world/work/life etc. All I can think about is her. The > longing becomes so intense. > > > > Amma has answered this to a degree: > > > > Slowly slowly O mind, everything in own pace happens > > Gardner may water a hundred buckets, fruit arrives only in its season > > > > First the pangs of separation > > Next grows the thirst for Love > > > > > > > > I had an experience in Dallas two or three years ago after a darshan > from Amma. After wards I cried intensely for her, so intense in fact > that I was crying over and over " Ammmmaaaaaa...Ammmmmaaaaa... > Ammmaaaaaa.... " It was so intense and so uncontrollable that I was on > the verge of calling out to her vocally.... somehow my mind was able > to think and was appalled that I would express myself like this out > loud, my mind and heart were two seprate entities, truly, and my mind > and heart were physically fighting against each other and after a bit > it calmed.... It was defiantly something Amma planted deep within... > it was coming somewhere so deep within me that I had NO IDEA there > were that many layers underneath... It was unexplainable and awing. I > will never forget it. > > > > Although I am not on that level of longing as I was that day.... it > is getting pretty intense and when the waves come as they have been > since seeing Amma this summer... all I can do is cry and long some > more and think of her... it is a struggle to get my mind to focus on > daily tasks. How does one do that? > > > > Although I know Mother is with me, knowing this and even feeling > that she is with me is still not enough for this heart. I still feel > the insense longing to be WITH her. > > Any advise? > > > > R. > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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