Amma /marriage

[Guest guest]

Ammachi , Stacee Kramer <stacee.kramer wrote:

>

> ONS

>

> God wants us to be happy and will bless our wish for a

> partner. Relationships are challenging no matter what

> the circumstances. Learning to love another selflessly

> and learning to work as a team requires much patience,

> love, trust and faith.

>

> There are no ideals when it comes to loving, once you

> get in there and really see what life is like with

> another.....

>

> Amma will however fulfill our desires for a

> companion.....it is up to us to accept the challenge

> and opportunity, and be willing to grow and stretch

> and face our fears in order to allow love to blossom.

>

> S

 

Thank you Stacy for such hopeful insight. I, too, believe that Amma

will fullfill our desires for a partner in life. However, I just

noticed that when it gets too hard, one or both of the partners bail

out on the relationship, blaming the other for their inadequacies and

failures. Truth is that no one is perfect and love is challenging,

requiring understanding, compassion, forgiveness, and sacrifice from

each partner.

 

I asked Amma last year for someone to love and to teach me to truly

love. I

got what I asked for, and it was/is very hard. But, I think that the

Guru gives us these hard lessons in order for us to grow out of our

" box " and become radiators of love and compassion. Isn't that why we

follow Amma around? To become like her? Imagine being able to love

like that. We shouldn't give up on the people we love just because it

gets too hard. What will happen when life gets REALLY hard? Times

are changing, hopefully we can all grab hold of those we love when the

wolf comes scratching at the door.....I think this is why Amma is

constantly lecturing us in every satsang to love each other and to try

to work things out with our loved ones. Aum Amriteswaryai Namah.

 

Madhurima

>

>

[Guest guest]

Om Namah Shivaya!

 

God wants us to be happy and He will grant our

wish for life partner. Our life is incomplete without

a life partner because married life provides unlimited

opportunities to improve spiritually. Marriage

challenges us to accept the choices of the life

partner and it always happens that every person is

irritated by atleast some choices of his/her life

partner. And in this irritation, he/she learns lessons

and improves spiritually. Of course the whole process

can be troublesome if the marriage has no pleasure and

so God has introduced pleasure also in marriage. The

patience of both the partners will be tested and the

partners become more patient, selfless, adjusting,

accepting etc. They understand love is a verb and not

just a feeling.

 

When Amma says there will be suffering in

marriage, it is not to say we have to runaway but

calling us to accept the challenge. As far the case of

Amma (or Jesus), She has accepted the choices of every

human being and so is beyond marriage. In one way,

every human being is a partner for Amma. Amma invites

us all to get to that stage.

 

Cheers,

 

Mahadevan Venkitaraman

 

--- Julia Milin <juliamilin wrote:

 

> Ammachi , Stacee Kramer

> <stacee.kramer wrote:

> >

> > ONS

> >

> > God wants us to be happy and will bless our wish

> for a

> > partner. Relationships are challenging no matter

> what

> > the circumstances. Learning to love another

> selflessly

> > and learning to work as a team requires much

> patience,

> > love, trust and faith.

> >

> > There are no ideals when it comes to loving, once

> you

> > get in there and really see what life is like with

> > another.....

> >

> > Amma will however fulfill our desires for a

> > companion.....it is up to us to accept the

> challenge

> > and opportunity, and be willing to grow and

> stretch

> > and face our fears in order to allow love to

> blossom.

> >

> > S

>

> Thank you Stacy for such hopeful insight. I, too,

> believe that Amma

> will fullfill our desires for a partner in life.

> However, I just

> noticed that when it gets too hard, one or both of

> the partners bail

> out on the relationship, blaming the other for their

> inadequacies and

> failures. Truth is that no one is perfect and love

> is challenging,

> requiring understanding, compassion, forgiveness,

> and sacrifice from

> each partner.

>

> I asked Amma last year for someone to love and to

> teach me to truly

> love. I

> got what I asked for, and it was/is very hard. But,

> I think that the

> Guru gives us these hard lessons in order for us to

> grow out of our

> " box " and become radiators of love and compassion.

> Isn't that why we

> follow Amma around? To become like her? Imagine

> being able to love

> like that. We shouldn't give up on the people we

> love just because it

> gets too hard. What will happen when life gets

> REALLY hard? Times

> are changing, hopefully we can all grab hold of

> those we love when the

> wolf comes scratching at the door.....I think this

> is why Amma is

> constantly lecturing us in every satsang to love

> each other and to try

> to work things out with our loved ones. Aum

> Amriteswaryai Namah.

>

> Madhurima

> >

> >

>

>

>

 

 

 

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[Guest guest]

In a message dated 12/21/2007 1:53:28 A.M. Eastern Standard Time,

mahadevanv writes:

 

Our life is incomplete without

a life partner

 

 

Please recognize that your statement is not truth. Are Swami's lives

incomplete because they have no life partner?

 

 

 

 

 

**************************************See AOL's top rated recipes

(http://food.aol.com/top-rated-recipes?NCID=aoltop00030000000004)

 

 

 

[Guest guest]

Namah Shivaya!

Well I have been married and have two grown kids and then divorced

for what I would and most would consider, very good reasons. I raised

my sons as a single parent. I had times (years!) when I longed for a

partner, then after seeing Amma, eventually that desire completely

evaporated! Poof! gone!! One day I woke up and looked back and

thought, hmmm I remember when I wanted a partner so badly and now,

now what? I have NO desire for this at all! Kali!Kali!

 

I really do not agree at all that our life is " incomplete without a

life partner. " ! We are complete as we are. We come alone and leave

this world by ouselves. No one holds our hand at death but our divine

guru, Amma.

 

I am probably the happiest I have ever been! It has been a tremendous

step to find happiness within and not needing someone else around to

supposedly " complete me " because that is not really true. A good

marriage is a great thing-don't misunderstand. But it's not for

everyone! My freedom to be independent fits me perfectly. It is truly

who I am.

 

As Amma says, whatever we have in our lives, wherever we are is where

we are supposed to be. For some, marriage is fine. One of Amma's

talks on tour was about marriage and while some leave marriage too

soon, She also did not condone staying in dangerous situations or bad

marriages either. So we have to use discrimination. If our marriage

creates stress to children, danger, tension on a constant basis, we

need to think about what is really healthy and use the power of our

mind to make good decisions for all. Sometimes leaving IS the

healthiest of all. My ex has grown and so have I with our separate

lives. It has been a very GOOD thing and through much effort, we

remain friends.

 

And the talk of manic depressives-a disorder that one cannot help-

what is the point? It's very hard to have this illness and I

personally know several incredible people who suffer with this

affliction who are amazing in all they accomplish in spite of this

hindrance. Mental illness is something we should show incredible

compassion for. I worked in special needs and whenever I work with

someone with needs, my heart just leaps and opens with an

indescribable love. I also have a sister with schizophrenia and we

need to do all we can for the poor and those with these mental

afflictions. We need to shower them with our love. They respond

greatly to this as all of us do.

 

Many happy holidays to all and blessings of this joyous season! Time

to bake cookies! LOL..

 

Amma really delivered to me this past year. She gave me a job that

provided a " bridge " in service from past work time. I had almost 4

weeks vacation to use before year's end starting in OCT! The week of

the Michigan retreat was opened with the EXACT number of days I

needed to take! Amma is amazing!!! How can we ever understand Her?!

 

love

in Amma's joy,

adriane

 

 

Ammachi , <mahadevanv wrote:

>

> Om Namah Shivaya!

>

> God wants us to be happy and He will grant our

> wish for life partner. Our life is incomplete without

> a life partner because married life provides unlimited

> opportunities to improve spiritually. Marriage

> challenges us to accept the choices of the life

> partner and it always happens that every person is

> irritated by atleast some choices of his/her life

> partner. And in this irritation, he/she learns lessons

> and improves spiritually. Of course the whole process

> can be troublesome if the marriage has no pleasure and

> so God has introduced pleasure also in marriage. The

> patience of both the partners will be tested and the

> partners become more patient, selfless, adjusting,

> accepting etc. They understand love is a verb and not

> just a feeling.

>

> When Amma says there will be suffering in

> marriage, it is not to say we have to runaway but

> calling us to accept the challenge. As far the case of

> Amma (or Jesus), She has accepted the choices of every

> human being and so is beyond marriage. In one way,

> every human being is a partner for Amma. Amma invites

> us all to get to that stage.

>

> Cheers,

>

> Mahadevan Venkitaraman

>

[Guest guest]

Om Namah Shivaya!

 

What you say is right. I could not express my views

properly. What I understand is we need a life partner

not for becoming complete but for each of us to

understand and share our completeness.

 

Thanks to Amma's grace, you have realised that

everyone in the World is a partner for each other.

Also you have found a purpose in life. In that

situation, you don't need a particular life partner.

 

The fundamental purpose of life for each of us is

to make the life of other human beings happy. The

first step towards this purpose is marriage. Of course

some fortunate people outgrow the need to have life

partner. You are talking from several steps ahead.

 

Neither does Amma tell anyone of us to live in

abusive situations. But Amma says 'those who divorce

at the drop of hat' have to suffer.

 

The Hindu scriptures tell that our life goes

through four Ashramas- Brahmacharya (Bachelorhood),

Grahastamshrama (Householder), Vanaprastha

(Preparation towards saintly life) and Sanyasa

(Saintly life.)

 

Cheers,

 

mahadevan venkitaraman

 

 

 

 

 

 

--- n2amma <a1driane wrote:

 

> Namah Shivaya!

> Well I have been married and have two grown kids and

> then divorced

> for what I would and most would consider, very good

> reasons. I raised

> my sons as a single parent. I had times (years!)

> when I longed for a

> partner, then after seeing Amma, eventually that

> desire completely

> evaporated! Poof! gone!! One day I woke up and

> looked back and

> thought, hmmm I remember when I wanted a partner so

> badly and now,

> now what? I have NO desire for this at all!

> Kali!Kali!

>

> I really do not agree at all that our life is

> " incomplete without a

> life partner. " ! We are complete as we are. We come

> alone and leave

> this world by ouselves. No one holds our hand at

> death but our divine

> guru, Amma.

>

> I am probably the happiest I have ever been! It has

> been a tremendous

> step to find happiness within and not needing

> someone else around to

> supposedly " complete me " because that is not really

> true. A good

> marriage is a great thing-don't misunderstand. But

> it's not for

> everyone! My freedom to be independent fits me

> perfectly. It is truly

> who I am.

>

> As Amma says, whatever we have in our lives,

> wherever we are is where

> we are supposed to be. For some, marriage is fine.

> One of Amma's

> talks on tour was about marriage and while some

> leave marriage too

> soon, She also did not condone staying in dangerous

> situations or bad

> marriages either. So we have to use discrimination.

> If our marriage

> creates stress to children, danger, tension on a

> constant basis, we

> need to think about what is really healthy and use

> the power of our

> mind to make good decisions for all. Sometimes

> leaving IS the

> healthiest of all. My ex has grown and so have I

> with our separate

> lives. It has been a very GOOD thing and through

> much effort, we

> remain friends.

>

> And the talk of manic depressives-a disorder that

> one cannot help-

> what is the point? It's very hard to have this

> illness and I

> personally know several incredible people who suffer

> with this

> affliction who are amazing in all they accomplish in

> spite of this

> hindrance. Mental illness is something we should

> show incredible

> compassion for. I worked in special needs and

> whenever I work with

> someone with needs, my heart just leaps and opens

> with an

> indescribable love. I also have a sister with

> schizophrenia and we

> need to do all we can for the poor and those with

> these mental

> afflictions. We need to shower them with our love.

> They respond

> greatly to this as all of us do.

>

> Many happy holidays to all and blessings of this

> joyous season! Time

> to bake cookies! LOL..

>

> Amma really delivered to me this past year. She gave

> me a job that

> provided a " bridge " in service from past work time.

> I had almost 4

> weeks vacation to use before year's end starting in

> OCT! The week of

> the Michigan retreat was opened with the EXACT

> number of days I

> needed to take! Amma is amazing!!! How can we ever

> understand Her?!

>

> love

> in Amma's joy,

> adriane

>

>

> Ammachi , <mahadevanv

> wrote:

> >

> > Om Namah Shivaya!

> >

> > God wants us to be happy and He will grant

> our

> > wish for life partner. Our life is incomplete

> without

> > a life partner because married life provides

> unlimited

> > opportunities to improve spiritually. Marriage

> > challenges us to accept the choices of the life

> > partner and it always happens that every person is

> > irritated by atleast some choices of his/her life

> > partner. And in this irritation, he/she learns

> lessons

> > and improves spiritually. Of course the whole

> process

> > can be troublesome if the marriage has no pleasure

> and

> > so God has introduced pleasure also in marriage.

> The

> > patience of both the partners will be tested and

> the

> > partners become more patient, selfless, adjusting,

> > accepting etc. They understand love is a verb and

> not

> > just a feeling.

> >

> > When Amma says there will be suffering in

> > marriage, it is not to say we have to runaway but

> > calling us to accept the challenge. As far the

> case of

> > Amma (or Jesus), She has accepted the choices of

> every

> > human being and so is beyond marriage. In one way,

> > every human being is a partner for Amma. Amma

> invites

> > us all to get to that stage.

> >

> > Cheers,

> >

> > Mahadevan Venkitaraman

> >

>

>

>

 

 

 

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[Guest guest]

Om Namah Shivaya!

 

My wording didn't clearly expressed my views.

Swamis understand that everyone in the World is each

other's partner and live that way. The reason we need

life partner is for sharing our love. Of course people

when they become more evolved spiritually could

outgrow the need to have life partner to share the

love.

 

Cheers,

 

mahadevan venkitaraman

 

 

 

 

--- rcbolton wrote:

 

>

> In a message dated 12/21/2007 1:53:28 A.M. Eastern

> Standard Time,

> mahadevanv writes:

>

> Our life is incomplete without

> a life partner

>

>

> Please recognize that your statement is not truth.

> Are Swami's lives

> incomplete because they have no life partner?

>

>

>

>

>

> **************************************See AOL's top

> rated recipes

>

(http://food.aol.com/top-rated-recipes?NCID=aoltop00030000000004)

>

>

> [Non-text portions of this message have been

> removed]

>

>

 

 

 

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[Guest guest]

ONS,

 

There are no firm lines here when it comes to

love.....there are many saints who were married and

this was the norm for certain traditions. (Sufi, some

Yogi's) It is unique for each of us. Some may feel the

need and some may enjoy being on their own.

 

As long as one is feeling and expressing love....this

is all that matters.

 

 

--- mahadevanv wrote:

 

> Om Namah Shivaya!

>

> My wording didn't clearly expressed my views.

> Swamis understand that everyone in the World is each

> other's partner and live that way. The reason we

> need

> life partner is for sharing our love. Of course

> people

> when they become more evolved spiritually could

> outgrow the need to have life partner to share the

> love.

>

> Cheers,

>

> mahadevan venkitaraman

>

>

>

>

> --- rcbolton wrote:

>

> >

> > In a message dated 12/21/2007 1:53:28 A.M. Eastern

> > Standard Time,

> > mahadevanv writes:

> >

> > Our life is incomplete without

> > a life partner

> >

> >

> > Please recognize that your statement is not truth.

>

> > Are Swami's lives

> > incomplete because they have no life partner?

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> > **************************************See AOL's

> top

> > rated recipes

> >

>

(http://food.aol.com/top-rated-recipes?NCID=aoltop00030000000004)

> >

> >

> > [Non-text portions of this message have been

> > removed]

> >

> >

>

>

>

>

>

______________________________\

____

> Looking for last minute shopping deals?

> Find them fast with Search.

>

http://tools.search./newsearch/category.php?category=shopping

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

>

> I asked Amma last year for someone to love and to

> teach me to truly

> love. I

> got what I asked for, and it was/is very hard. But,

> I think that the

> Guru gives us these hard lessons in order for us to

> grow out of our

> " box " and become radiators of love and compassion.

> Isn't that why we

> follow Amma around? To become like her?

 

ONS,

 

YES!!! In my experience, this has been the great gift

that a relationship can bring! I too received what I

asked for and it has been amazingly and profoundly

beautiful, and very, very hard.

 

The concept of loving someone in an intimate

relationship is different than loving your neighbor

selflessly. We should bring the willingness to love

selflessly into the intimate relationship, but we are

also asked to truly face ourselves and all of our

vulnerabilities.

 

s

[Guest guest]

Om Namah Shivaya,

 

Yes, thank you. I simply used the Swami's as an example. The responses by

others in this discussion have given much better examples and explanations of

what I was trying to say : )

 

Thank you,

Para

 

 

 

**************************************See AOL's top rated recipes

(http://food.aol.com/top-rated-recipes?NCID=aoltop00030000000004)

 

 

 

[Guest guest]

touche!

 

Ammachi , Stacee Kramer <stacee.kramer

wrote:

>

> ONS,

>

> There are no firm lines here when it comes to

> love.....there are many saints who were married and

> this was the norm for certain traditions. (Sufi, some

> Yogi's) It is unique for each of us. Some may feel the

> need and some may enjoy being on their own.

>

> As long as one is feeling and expressing love....this

> is all that matters.

>

>

> --- mahadevanv wrote:

>

> > Om Namah Shivaya!

> >

> > My wording didn't clearly expressed my views.

> > Swamis understand that everyone in the World is each

> > other's partner and live that way. The reason we

> > need

> > life partner is for sharing our love. Of course

> > people

> > when they become more evolved spiritually could

> > outgrow the need to have life partner to share the

> > love.

> >

> > Cheers,

> >

> > mahadevan venkitaraman

> >

> >

> >

> >

> > --- rcbolton wrote:

> >

> > >

> > > In a message dated 12/21/2007 1:53:28 A.M. Eastern

> > > Standard Time,

> > > mahadevanv writes:

> > >

> > > Our life is incomplete without

> > > a life partner

> > >

> > >

> > > Please recognize that your statement is not truth.

> >

> > > Are Swami's lives

> > > incomplete because they have no life partner?

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > > **************************************See AOL's

> > top

> > > rated recipes

> > >

> >

> (http://food.aol.com/top-rated-recipes?NCID=aoltop00030000000004)

> > >

> > >

> > > [Non-text portions of this message have been

> > > removed]

> > >

> > >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

>

____________________

______________

> > Looking for last minute shopping deals?

> > Find them fast with Search.

> >

> http://tools.search./newsearch/category.php?

category=shopping

> >

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

Amen Adrianne! My life has been fuller & more complete since NOT having a

partner. As a mother, it's been almost 6 years since I very deliberately quit

dating. The desire & ability to do this has been by God's grace. When asked

about a partner, Amma said she was married to God, & so everyone is her child.

Obviously, a different relationship status is best for various people, & maybe

varies at different times fo life. God is the one who completes us.

 

n2amma <a1driane wrote:

We are complete as we are. We come alone and leave

this world by ouselves. No one holds our hand at death but our divine

guru, Amma.

 

 

 

 

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