2-Debra, Mark Kincaid...5/27..... Astrology and Relationship Problems....

[Guest guest]

Dear Debra:

 

I like your idea of looking at particular charts and examining them for relationship, 'compatibilities', & 'skills or lack of skill'.

 

The below email was one I sent in already but talks about the ideas that have been going on the last few days regarding relationships.

 

In this email I talk about one 'negative' regarding relationships; the malefic, and classic, kuja dosha, but Jyotish has a great perspective to teach us about relationships...

 

I look forward to examing relationships from the point of view of Vedic knowledge, and Jyotish in particular.

 

take care

 

 

Mark K.

 

 

If you have any examples of some charts that you'd like to look at ..... let's look at them.

 

 

 

 

'Relationships', and 'Marriage' are two of the most fascinating aspects of Astrology to me.

 

It's hard, however, to think too much in terms of generalities, when a close examination of any and every person's individual charts, expresses the 'real' details of our lives.

 

I find it fascinating that the details of individual charts, not only fits our individual situations, but also mirror, in some deep, Cosmic way, what our whole culture is going through, at the same time.

 

Take any issue that we'd like to focus on and the details of each person's individual 'karmas', pop right out at us.

 

Take the issue of 'expectation' that Therese talks about in her email, below.

 

Each one of us have many expectations, ideas and aspects of Philosophy or Psychology which all rolled together, reflect our individual charts and Mind sets.

 

I've noticed in both men and women, when unrealistic, 'expectations', are present, that it has the effect of delaying the natural fulfillment of desires.

 

Take Virgo for example. In it's 'positive' mode, Virgo inspires us to seek perfection. However, for those with most planets in Virgo, unrealistic 'expectations', seems to be a natural consequence.

 

Why?

 

Because the Philosophy of Jyotish tells us what are healthy, or balanced 'opinions', and what are unrealistic, imbalanced or unsuccessful....

 

 

'Perfectionism' is one such idea that is well captured by Virgo.

 

I have one friend who has Mars in Virgo in his 7th House.

 

He is extremely 'picky', and a natural 'perfectionist', especially towards his wife.

 

I was, however, able to share a vision of Jyotish for he and his wife, before they even got married.

 

It was especially fascinating because they had come to me, to have their charts looked at and they still weren't sure about whether they were 'compatible' or not.

 

Actually, it was the man who was not sure.

 

And I didn't really tell him one way or the other, what he should do; instead, I just explained their two charts, and what they would be both bringing to the relationship.

 

When I talked about my friend's chart, I knew it was hard for him to accept his Mars in Virgo evaluation, but he also knew enough Jyotish, to know that what I was saying wasn't personal, and anyone would say the same thing.

 

Now, after many years of marriage, the two of them, have evolved very nicely through the normally, 'debilitating' effect of both Mars and Mars and Virgo in the 7th House.

 

Now, whenever 'they' have an disagreement, they both look at each other, and one of them says, ....'oops'.... there's that Mars in Virgo, 'thing' ....again!

 

Now, they kind of laugh about it, though in the first year of their marriage, it was much more difficult.

 

Jyotish can help anyone move through their karmas, especially in regard to relationships or marriage, because Marriage is almost 90% attitude.

 

Sure, there's the compatibility part, but I find most people when I'm talking to them about their relationships, are generally 'compatible', however...

 

almost all the time, when people are encountering 'problems', it's because of some 'lack of skill', in the area of relationship. That's the real problem.

 

For my friends, Jyotish was able to point out exactly the nature and characteristic of his 'unnatural' or 'unrealistic' expectation that he would be bringing to the relationship.

 

So, instead of 'blaming' her, being too critical of her, what she's doing, etc....

both of them, saw that characteristic for what it was....

 

one of 'his' malefics....!

 

And instead of flowing through it, and literally causing their relationship to fail, they learned some knowledge, that allowed them to literally, ....change that malefic, and avoid the danger on the horizon.

 

It would be fun to look at any problem, unrealistic expectation,.... but examine real cases, real charts....to come to understand, 'better', how we might change those patterns which could be detrimental to a naturally successful relationship.

 

We could talk about Mars, or Kuja dosha.

 

Whenever Mars is in the 1st, 4th, 7th or 12 Houses,....especially, there is this Mars tension that could have disastrous affects upon the marriage.

 

Then, there are people who have Saturn in the 7th House.

 

Or, there are those with Sun in the 7th House,

or Moon, or Rahu or Ketu.

 

It would be very helpful to discuss real life situations of people with 'malefic' situations in their 'relationship', parts of their charts...

 

And figure out the solutions!....that is, to me, the real purpose and goal of great....Jyotish!

 

 

Fun talking with you all.

 

Sincerely,

 

 

 

Mark Kincaid

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Therese Hamilton <eastwest

 

Wed, 26 May 2004 17:15:01 -0700

 

Re: Astrology and The Gender Divide

 

 

At 09:59 PM 5/26/04 -0000, Mu wrote:

>Because a great number of people have contacted me in gratitude for

>my humble writings on the question of relationship, marriage and so

>on, I have decided to share these writings which originally appeared

>on the Pan Astrological Forum. What appears below are a series of

>thoughts and opinions by me and other respected members of the PAF.

>I am hopeful that they spark thought and promote meaningful

>discussion on the matters discussed therein...

Hello Mu,

Having read through your long post as best I could, I agree that the

expectations of women today tend to go through the roof. I can't comment on

what men want or expect and I can't comment on the Black community. I can

only comment on what I've seen amoung White women.

Due to the glamor the media has presented us with, many women do want the

impossible from men. **Expectation** is the name of the culprit. I've been

married to the same man all my life, a fine man with the best spiritual

values, but when I look at my own expectations, and if I were in the

marriage market today, there's a lot more I'd ask for. I can see that my

attitude has become unrealistic with a few added-on false values. I believe

these increased " wants " are due to the glamor the media has presented us

with: The perfect sensitive, charming, highly intelligent, sophisticated

hunk on the movie screens and in the T.V. sitcoms.

In a way the values of Indian marriage that you mentioned are much more

realistic. In many cultures such as the Indian culture the sexes are still

separated for the most part in everyday life. Women mix with women and men

mix with men. I believe an answer for women is to have some sensitive

female friends to share their feeling and thoughts with. Many of these

thoughts and feelings are alien to men and always will be. Only the guys in

the movies understand those sensitivities.

A long married friend of mine once said something like this to me, " You

know, marriage is basically a business proposition for the benefit of

society and the raising of children. Each half of the marriage fulfills

their gender role as best they can. "

The initial sexual attraction is sort of a cosmic trap to get two people

into a responsible relationship that will benefit children and society.

Unfortunately these basic values are being thrown to the wind in favor of

something called 'romance' and out-of-sight 'expectations.'

But there's no astrology in this post!!

Therese