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Dear Members,

 

Like Bhaskar, I too believe that it's important to address people in the

right manner. There was a time (on this group) when people, unfamiliar

with my name, were addressing me as Sir. I thought the best way to

correct this would be to put " Mrs.Wendy " in my signature...which is

included automatically at the foot of all my mails unless I (remember to)

take the trouble to change it.

 

I'm in my 60's now and have to say I still have not adjusted to the

younger generation's way of casually addressing the older generation by

their first name. I find it disrespectful in the extreme. My children's

partners do this, unfortunately, and it really bothers me...I have to

accept it for the sake of harmony but I'll never feel comfortable with

it.

 

The salutation " Madam " can have other connotations in certain societies.

For instance the owner of a brothel is referred to as " Madam " .

 

Surely it cannot be too difficult to address people with the proper

salutation. I have to be honest and say that I am not comfortable being

addressed as Madam as I am neither the wife of a foreign dignitary nor am

I the owner of a brothel.

 

Mrs.Wendy is to my mind a fair compromise (bridging the gap) between the

casual younger generation and the more traditional older generation.

 

Best Wishes,

Mrs. Wendy

http://JyotishVidya.com

___

 

 

 

-

" Bhaskar " <bhaskar_jyotish

<jyotish-vidya >

Tuesday, June 24, 2008 4:24 PM

Re: Yogoda

 

 

 

Dear Krishnaji,

 

But I am still from the old mould.

 

Yes I understand this predicament.

I have to undergo it many times. It

is normal to address anyone with

first name today and is not

considered disrespectful.

In Bombay we are into this shift of

mode several times a week.

I remember 10-12 years ago,

I had done a course on Landmark

Forum, under a good speaker

known as Ferdie. There the

audience all 300 of them

including me, were addressing each

other by first name only. For me it

was the start of a embarassing

situation for the first time in Life, that

time for was not accustomed to

addressing elders by age or by

status, by their first names.

Their calling me so did not

bother me, and neither

your calling me so makes any

difference at all , for now several

years have passed since that

experience and been through this

a thousand times. To becalled as

" Bhaskar " is not a problem for me,

but not to add a ji, to the person with

whom I communicate, makes me

uncomfortable.

 

Just recently 2 weeks ago, at the

Moderators meet, I was feeling

pretty disturbed to address the

Community manager, a young lady,

Shefali, whom every one addressed as

'Shefali', but I could not come to those

terms and still address her as " Shefaliji " .

She being a lady, and an important

Head of a big Company like ,

there was no way i could bring myself to

address her by first name, even

though the atmosphere was party

atmosphere.

 

In the Marwadi circles we move, at most

of the homes, they addtress the

servants also as " aap " and " ji " .

I cannot enter this transition, as it

will spoil my vocabulary at wrong places

due to force of habit, which would be

developed, if i start doing this.

Hence you may please address me

as Bhaskar with Love,

but for me I do not

know when I would be comfortable

with this, from my side.

 

Though you may find me sometimes

doing so, when i address many natives

much younger, or with kiddish queries,

or when these younger ones

act affectionately.

 

regards,

Bhaskar.

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