ANS: # No. 2736:promoatl@a... : I've had a very sad life!!!!!!!!

[Guest guest]

Dear Ami,

Plz mention your Long. & Lati. or country.

Thanks

May God bless you

Umesh Sharma

 

 

lalkitab , " obatalaschild "

<promoatl@a...> wrote:

> Hello Umesh, I would like to start by saying that I am grateful for

> the invitation to the group.

>

> I have studied Traditional Astrology for 13 years, but I have very

> little knowledge of Vedic or Jyotish Astrology.

>

> My birthdata is Oct 9, 1974 Clifton, Illinois, 4:27pm

>

> Umesh, I have had an extremely hard and difficult life. I was

> abandoned by my father and abused by my mother. I do not have

> contact w/ either parent. About 10 years ago my father made it

very

> clear to me that he is not interested in me, and my mother just

> doesn't care much about me. When I was 21 years old I had a child,

> and my child's father kidnapped him, and to make a long story

short,

> I hv no relationship w/ my child. My child's father (born Oct 1,

> 1973 Cleveland, Ohio, time unknown) was cruel, abusive, and

> controlling, and his keeping my child from me is part of his cruel

> and controlling nature.

>

> I have never had a successful relationship, every man that I hv

dated

> has lied to me in some way, and twice I hv been in an abusive

> relationship. Many times I have experienced abandonment in

> relationships, as they usually just leave me for no discernable

> reason. Most of my life has been spent alone, I live alone, I have

> no family or support system, and Ive lost all hope of having a

> partner whom is loyal and loving.

>

> In 1997 I contracted the herpes virus from a boyfriend who failed

to

> tell me that he had it himself, and then he accused me of giving it

> to him. Since this time I have been relatively alone.

>

> I do not hv any desire to hv any more children (after the trauma of

> hving my 1st child taken from me). And I have no desire to ever

get

> married. Through the little that I do know about Astrology I know

> that the T-Square between Saturn, Sun-Mars, and Chiron will

probably

> prevent any truly happy family life anyway. And also that the

Saturn-

> Mars square tends to attract painful relationships w/ men. Mars

> being in my 8th house, Saturn in the 5th, that explains me

> contracting the herpes virus. The funny thing is, Saturn being in

my

> 5th greatly diminishes my sex drive (and perhaps opportunities for

> relationships), and I am not even overly sexually active. Like I

> mentioned previously, I hv spent most of my adult life alone,

marked

> w/ long periods of abstinence.

>

> And last but not least, I have lost the will to live. Everyday I

> think about death, and I often pray for it. I hate the hand that

has

> been dealt to me in life, & I am extremely bitter and resentful

> (although my combust Mars rarely outwardly displays my anger). I

am

> a sweet and giving person, apparently to my own detriment, and it

> constantly eats at me how I've allowed others to abuse and take

> advantage of me. Most nights I cry myself to sleep, and Im just

> tired of being here. I feel like my life is not worth living, I

feel

> like Ive failed. I have very little energy left to continue (dont

> worry, Im not suicidal).

>

> My two quesions are this, is there anything that I can do to help

> release the past 25 years of pain and heartache?

>

> And also, I do not have medical insurance or access to medical

care,

> and when I have herpes outbreaks they are very painful physically

and

> moreso emotionally. Is there anything that I can do suppress or

even

> cure the virus? For the past 2 years I hv had to take Echinacea

> EVERY DAY twice a day to suppress infections. If I miss even a day

> my arms, legs, and feet fall asleep and I will have a break out in

> two days' time. It's miserable!!!

>

> Thank you for reading my post, I know its long, but Ive been

through

> a lot.

>

> Emi