Swamiji's rest.My personal opinion.

August 19, 2006

Jai Guru Datta

A couple of days,before I read the mail on Swamiji's required rest,I dreamt in my afternoon nap,that our Swamiji was lying in His bed,slightly trmbling with body pain and saying that it was only "very tired" .But actually He is taking the hardships of lot of His devotees and suffering it.That suffering is done internally and He is doing His duty with pleasure (No complaints). I remember telling Him that,in a way to do help in that (rather like sharing the workload) I would learn to bear my pains,my own pains first.If some of us devotees,who can bear our own pains (and in that way clear the imminent own karmas) I told Swamiji (in that dream)that I shall try hard and learn to bear the pains of my past births' bad karmas.And be of some help to Him.

I still remember His face glowing with compassion.With a smile,He nodded approvingly.

Well, that may only be a dream and being a Psychologist (out of work) I know too well what our dreams are made of.But still.after reading the mail from a devotee,asking all of us to pray to Her,Maathaa Jayalakshmi,for providing Him some rest,in the way He wants.,I just could not help myself remembering that dream.

Surely Swamiji knows what is required for Him and I think,since Maathaa has ordered Him to go near the person,whenever somebody cries out for Him. Some of us are content only if He is physically come near us.(me included ,some years back)(Well, even now to some extent)

Let me share one of experiences in this regard.That time,I was very freightened,facing a particular crisis,that sucks away the confidence in the brain,along with some chemical imbalance.Also the physical and mental difficulties of life at that stage.Severe than the one,that brought me to Him,years back.

I realized only after a week,that I should go to the nearest Datta Temple.(The pain was so all consuming,one can not think straight).When I went and told somebody there,that person told me that Swamiji would be coming in 10 days,to that place,after completing His tour abroad.

And he hastenend to add that,He had just made flying visit to T.Nagar Chennai,while on that very tour abroad.He went to a devotee's house and He informed nobody about the visit in advance.When was that?.. A week back..And I realized that on that very day,I was crying out in mental pain, in T.nagar Chennai.( I was there on that exact day and time ... coming from 300Kms away)He came from 10000 Kms away.Was there and went back continuing His tour.

Tears were uncontrollable after that.I am nothing. He might have made that flying visit, taking a break from His tour abroad just to visit a devotee's house.

Or it might be...He just could not bear my cry,He chose to make that flying visit.

And after 10 days when He came to Chennai after fully completing His tour abroad,He stood in that stage,and thundered "I am the walking God.Why do you go and pray even to my photo.If your pains are that bad,why dont you come straight to me physically? Dont I walk physically? ( Meaning,His physical availability has to be fully utilzed,for that is so rarest of rare things that could happen to us.)

But most of us are yet to realise this rarity.They tend to treat His physical presense as something ...they just take it for granted.Just like some holyman's. Lot of us devotees know for sure that calling Him a holy man is like calling the Sun a great ball of fire.He is much much more(Much to the power of infinity)

Since my mind was so clouded with disease,and I could not make that visit to go to Him,He took all the trouble of coming near me.

We all know that He is always like that.It is His compassion.Though the suffering of ours is created because of our bad karma.,because we are good and we want to repent and we are asking Him for a second chance,He out of sheer compassion,goes to any extend to help us.

And There are so many of us, still crying,.still adamant not learning to bite the bullet.

I can not speak for others,but I wish to declare here that,I shall learn to bite the bullet,and suffer this pains in silent,clearing my karmas on the way.

And leave Swamiji to take His rest.After all He is asking for only 6 months.

I have already prayed and asked Mother.To give my Lord,some rest.After all He wants it only to increasingly do what She had ordered earlier.To go to anyone who calls Him,who needs Him. There may be some,who just want to show their love.Like Nakula who wanted to tie Krishna's feet with his rope of love. And we have Raadha.She gladly lets Krishna to others.I would rather be like Raadha,to my Swamiji.

Ok.If somebody is going to start some internet Vratha.or some slogan chanting,towards our Master's much needed rest,count me in as Numo Uno.

Jai Guru Datta.

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