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Posted

Respected teachers on this forum -

I am in great duress. Please help me. I am at that stage in my life

where most people want stability, security and life of dignity. But

fate has something else stored for me I guess.I desperately need your

help and advice. What should I do ? All these years I have not taken

any decision, life announced its decisions upon me and I accepted. I

put on a mask everyday of my life of what a happy and cosy life I lead.

I do not like to wash my dirty linen(which is my husband's)in public.

But I am not sure if I can continue this act anymore. My husband has

filed for divorce. I am totally broken within. Is there any hope for

me? What about my children ?

Sincere thanks.

Mona.

---------------------------

Details:

11th Oct 1971, Bombay(India), 9:15 am.

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Posted
Posted

Respected Mona_Khadilkar,

Things will take shape after 22-7-2006 and within a weeks.time.Please write

to me afterwards for further analysis of course free of cost..

Regards,

jagannathan.

 

 

 

On 7/20/06, mona_khadilkar <mona_khadilkar > wrote:

>

> Respected teachers on this forum -

> I am in great duress. Please help me. I am at that stage in my life

> where most people want stability, security and life of dignity. But

> fate has something else stored for me I guess.I desperately need your

> help and advice. What should I do ? All these years I have not taken

> any decision, life announced its decisions upon me and I accepted. I

> put on a mask everyday of my life of what a happy and cosy life I lead.

> I do not like to wash my dirty linen(which is my husband's)in public.

> But I am not sure if I can continue this act anymore. My husband has

> filed for divorce. I am totally broken within. Is there any hope for

> me? What about my children ?

> Sincere thanks.

> Mona.

> ---------------------------

> Details:

> 11th Oct 1971, Bombay(India), 9:15 am.

>

>

>

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Dear Mona,

A slight change in time can alter your horoscope.

Kindly answer following questions to verify the horoscope.

i. Are you the eldest or youngest amongst sisters in your family.

ii. The total number of brothers and sisters are two or five.

iii. Was the married life of your parents also disturbed.

iv. Was there any problem to your mother at the time of your birth or were you a Caeserian birth

v. did you marry after 1991.

vi. do you have two children

vii. Was your education in areas of finance like commerce etc. or general humanities.

viii. Most likely period of marriage seems to be between 1994-1997.

ix. Is your husband self-employed or the work that he has has overseas connections.

x. Finally, do you have problems with your teeth.

regards,

Manoj

 

Jagannathan Kapisthalam <jagannathankr > wrote:

Respected Mona_Khadilkar,

Things will take shape after 22-7-2006 and within a weeks.time.Please write to me afterwards for further analysis of course free of cost..

Regards,

jagannathan.

 

 

On 7/20/06, mona_khadilkar <mona_khadilkar > wrote: Respected teachers on this forum -

I am in great duress. Please help me. I am at that stage in my life

where most people want stability, security and life of dignity. But

fate has something else stored for me I guess.I desperately need your

help and advice. What should I do ? All these years I have not taken

any decision, life announced its decisions upon me and I accepted. I

put on a mask everyday of my life of what a happy and cosy life I lead.

I do not like to wash my dirty linen(which is my husband's)in public.

But I am not sure if I can continue this act anymore. My husband has

filed for divorce. I am totally broken within. Is there any hope for

me? What about my children ?

Sincere thanks.

Mona.

---------------------------

Details:

11th Oct 1971, Bombay(India), 9:15 am.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Posted
Posted

Dear Manojji and Jagannathji -

Thank you for your prompt replies.

I want to go back to India to raise my kids with my parents support.

I do not know how much more life I have to live, but I only pray that

God be merciful enough to letme lead a life of self respect and

dignity. And be able to bring up my children with good values.

WIll moving back to India be a good decision for me ? I dont know if

I can continue in US after divorce after all the emotional turmoil

that I have gone through in my marriage. But at same time I am also

worried if life will be worse for me in India after divorce ? Also

will I be financially secure ? Do I need to work all throughout my

life or can I take a break in job during my transition to India?

 

Jagannathji, I will write to you in one week's time again.

Manoj ji, here are answers to your questions.

Thank you once again for all your advise and guidance.

Mona

valist, Manoj Kumar <mouji99 wrote:

>

> Dear Mona,

>

> A slight change in time can alter your horoscope.

>

> Kindly answer following questions to verify the horoscope.

>

> i. Are you the eldest or youngest amongst sisters in your family.

-- Yes. Only child of my parents.

> ii. The total number of brothers and sisters are two or five.

-- 0. My mother had to undergo an abortion due to in-laws trouble.

She was pregnant for second time when I was 3 months old.

> iii. Was the married life of your parents also disturbed.

-- Extremely distrubed. In-Laws issues and my mothers short temper.

> iv. Was there any problem to your mother at the time of your

birth or were you a Caeserian birth

-- No. Labour was for 6 - 8 hrs. Normal delivery.

> v. did you marry after 1991.

-- Yes

> vi. do you have two children

-- Yes. First boy and then girl

> vii. Was your education in areas of finance like commerce etc. or

general humanities.

-- No. Engineering degree(electronics) and in software industry all

throughout.

> viii. Most likely period of marriage seems to be between 1994-

1997.

-- Yes. June 1996.

> ix. Is your husband self-employed or the work that he has has

overseas connections.

-- Both husband and I are employed in US. He has lost a few jobs

before. He is in IT sales/recruiting.

> x. Finally, do you have problems with your teeth.

-- Yes. Lots of problems. I have many partial dentures, my teeth are

extra sensitive to pain and I have had quite a few painful

extrations/teeth work.

>

> regards,

>

> Manoj

>

> Jagannathan Kapisthalam <jagannathankr wrote:

> Respected Mona_Khadilkar,

> Things will take shape after 22-7-2006 and within a

weeks.time.Please write to me afterwards for further analysis of

course free of cost..

> Regards,

> jagannathan.

>

>

>

> On 7/20/06, mona_khadilkar <mona_khadilkar

wrote: Respected teachers on this forum -

> I am in great duress. Please help me. I am at that stage in my life

> where most people want stability, security and life of dignity. But

> fate has something else stored for me I guess.I desperately need

your

> help and advice. What should I do ? All these years I have not

taken

> any decision, life announced its decisions upon me and I accepted.

I

> put on a mask everyday of my life of what a happy and cosy life I

lead.

> I do not like to wash my dirty linen(which is my husband's)in

public.

> But I am not sure if I can continue this act anymore. My husband

has

> filed for divorce. I am totally broken within. Is there any hope

for

> me? What about my children ?

> Sincere thanks.

> Mona.

> ---------------------------

> Details:

> 11th Oct 1971, Bombay(India), 9:15 am.

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

> See the all-new, redesigned .com. Check it out.

>

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Posted
Posted

Also, I wanted to add that my parents (esp. mother) are not happy

about the divorce situation and think I should do whatever it takes

to save the marriage for kids sake. To save everyone from shame and

disgrace. I have a very hard time understanding their notion, because

I have already suffered enough all these years when my husband has

treated me like garbage, mostly comparing me with other american

women. How can I forget all that ? And all his betrayal when I was so

honest and loyal and hardworking ? I am living like a roommate in my

own house, and not getting in his way at all. He leads seperate life

and I lead seperate life. I do not question him anything. I do

sincerely my job and come home to my kids. He is also attached to

kids but often has made it very clear to me that he does not need me

in his life. Should I still beg and plead with him to not divorce and

continue this act for kids sake ?

 

I wanted him to prove to me that he really needs me. And he wants to

not discuss anything. Just continue our parallel lives. He wants kids

to be brought up American way just like he himself has become. He

does not attend any Indian social function with me. I like jhansi ki

raani take my kids everywhere and go alone. People have also started

asking me why I go alone everywhere and why my husband doesn't come.

 

Despite all this my parents still think, I should give in and beg him

to stay together for children sake because otherwise I will have no

one in this world after they are gone and life will be very difficult

for single mother. Even if someone marries me again, that will be

worse becasue the new person will never want my children. So its

better to compromise and live with my husband only.

 

I am very distressed and afraid of husband, mother, world, my age, my

small children and everything. I just do not know how long I will

continue to live a life of fear and still raise my kids.

Is my life over ? Do I hv no right to dream of happy life ?

 

valist, "mona_khadilkar" <mona_khadilkar

wrote:

>

> Dear Manojji and Jagannathji -

> Thank you for your prompt replies.

> I want to go back to India to raise my kids with my parents support.

> I do not know how much more life I have to live, but I only pray

that

> God be merciful enough to letme lead a life of self respect and

> dignity. And be able to bring up my children with good values.

> WIll moving back to India be a good decision for me ? I dont know

if

> I can continue in US after divorce after all the emotional turmoil

> that I have gone through in my marriage. But at same time I am also

> worried if life will be worse for me in India after divorce ? Also

> will I be financially secure ? Do I need to work all throughout my

> life or can I take a break in job during my transition to India?

>

> Jagannathji, I will write to you in one week's time again.

> Manoj ji, here are answers to your questions.

> Thank you once again for all your advise and guidance.

> Mona

> valist, Manoj Kumar <mouji99@> wrote:

> >

> > Dear Mona,

> >

> > A slight change in time can alter your horoscope.

> >

> > Kindly answer following questions to verify the horoscope.

> >

> > i. Are you the eldest or youngest amongst sisters in your

family.

> -- Yes. Only child of my parents.

> > ii. The total number of brothers and sisters are two or five.

> -- 0. My mother had to undergo an abortion due to in-laws trouble.

> She was pregnant for second time when I was 3 months old.

> > iii. Was the married life of your parents also disturbed.

> -- Extremely distrubed. In-Laws issues and my mothers short temper.

> > iv. Was there any problem to your mother at the time of your

> birth or were you a Caeserian birth

> -- No. Labour was for 6 - 8 hrs. Normal delivery.

> > v. did you marry after 1991.

> -- Yes

> > vi. do you have two children

> -- Yes. First boy and then girl

> > vii. Was your education in areas of finance like commerce etc.

or

> general humanities.

> -- No. Engineering degree(electronics) and in software industry all

> throughout.

> > viii. Most likely period of marriage seems to be between 1994-

> 1997.

> -- Yes. June 1996.

> > ix. Is your husband self-employed or the work that he has has

> overseas connections.

> -- Both husband and I are employed in US. He has lost a few jobs

> before. He is in IT sales/recruiting.

> > x. Finally, do you have problems with your teeth.

> -- Yes. Lots of problems. I have many partial dentures, my teeth

are

> extra sensitive to pain and I have had quite a few painful

> extrations/teeth work.

> >

> > regards,

> >

> > Manoj

> >

> > Jagannathan Kapisthalam <jagannathankr@> wrote:

> > Respected Mona_Khadilkar,

> > Things will take shape after 22-7-2006 and within a

> weeks.time.Please write to me afterwards for further analysis of

> course free of cost..

> > Regards,

> > jagannathan.

> >

> >

> >

> > On 7/20/06, mona_khadilkar <mona_khadilkar@>

> wrote: Respected teachers on this forum -

> > I am in great duress. Please help me. I am at that stage in my

life

> > where most people want stability, security and life of dignity.

But

> > fate has something else stored for me I guess.I desperately need

> your

> > help and advice. What should I do ? All these years I have not

> taken

> > any decision, life announced its decisions upon me and I

accepted.

> I

> > put on a mask everyday of my life of what a happy and cosy life I

> lead.

> > I do not like to wash my dirty linen(which is my husband's)in

> public.

> > But I am not sure if I can continue this act anymore. My husband

> has

> > filed for divorce. I am totally broken within. Is there any hope

> for

> > me? What about my children ?

> > Sincere thanks.

> > Mona.

> > ---------------------------

> > Details:

> > 11th Oct 1971, Bombay(India), 9:15 am.

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> > See the all-new, redesigned .com. Check it out.

> >

>

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Posted
Posted

Dear Mona ji,

I am sorry, I have little hope for you. Some elders in the family may get involved for helping the situation. I see movement in your case in October, 2006. I would request you to offer sincere prayers to Lord Shiva.

Best wishes,

Manoj

 

mona_khadilkar <mona_khadilkar > wrote:

Also, I wanted to add that my parents (esp. mother) are not happy

about the divorce situation and think I should do whatever it takes

to save the marriage for kids sake. To save everyone from shame and

disgrace. I have a very hard time understanding their notion, because

I have already suffered enough all these years when my husband has

treated me like garbage, mostly comparing me with other american

women. How can I forget all that ? And all his betrayal when I was so

honest and loyal and hardworking ? I am living like a roommate in my

own house, and not getting in his way at all. He leads seperate life

and I lead seperate life. I do not question him anything. I do

sincerely my job and come home to my kids. He is also attached to

kids but often has made it very clear to me that he does not need me

in his life. Should I still beg and plead with him to not divorce and

continue this act for kids sake ?

 

I wanted him to prove to me that he really needs me. And he wants to

not discuss anything. Just continue our parallel lives. He wants kids

to be brought up American way just like he himself has become. He

does not attend any Indian social function with me. I like jhansi ki

raani take my kids everywhere and go alone. People have also started

asking me why I go alone everywhere and why my husband doesn't come.

 

Despite all this my parents still think, I should give in and beg him

to stay together for children sake because otherwise I will have no

one in this world after they are gone and life will be very difficult

for single mother. Even if someone marries me again, that will be

worse becasue the new person will never want my children. So its

better to compromise and live with my husband only.

 

I am very distressed and afraid of husband, mother, world, my age, my

small children and everything. I just do not know how long I will

continue to live a life of fear and still raise my kids.

Is my life over ? Do I hv no right to dream of happy life ?

 

valist, "mona_khadilkar" <mona_khadilkar

wrote:

>

> Dear Manojji and Jagannathji -

> Thank you for your prompt replies.

> I want to go back to India to raise my kids with my parents support.

> I do not know how much more life I have to live, but I only pray

that

> God be merciful enough to letme lead a life of self respect and

> dignity. And be able to bring up my children with good values.

> WIll moving back to India be a good decision for me ? I dont know

if

> I can continue in US after divorce after all the emotional turmoil

> that I have gone through in my marriage. But at same time I am also

> worried if life will be worse for me in India after divorce ? Also

> will I be financially secure ? Do I need to work all throughout my

> life or can I take a break in job during my transition to India?

>

> Jagannathji, I will write to you in one week's time again.

> Manoj ji, here are answers to your questions.

> Thank you once again for all your advise and guidance.

> Mona

> valist, Manoj Kumar <mouji99@> wrote:

> >

> > Dear Mona,

> >

> > A slight change in time can alter your horoscope.

> >

> > Kindly answer following questions to verify the horoscope.

> >

> > i. Are you the eldest or youngest amongst sisters in your

family.

> -- Yes. Only child of my parents.

> > ii. The total number of brothers and sisters are two or five.

> -- 0. My mother had to undergo an abortion due to in-laws trouble.

> She was pregnant for second time when I was 3 months old.

> > iii. Was the married life of your parents also disturbed.

> -- Extremely distrubed. In-Laws issues and my mothers short temper.

> > iv. Was there any problem to your mother at the time of your

> birth or were you a Caeserian birth

> -- No. Labour was for 6 - 8 hrs. Normal delivery.

> > v. did you marry after 1991.

> -- Yes

> > vi. do you have two children

> -- Yes. First boy and then girl

> > vii. Was your education in areas of finance like commerce etc.

or

> general humanities.

> -- No. Engineering degree(electronics) and in software industry all

> throughout.

> > viii. Most likely period of marriage seems to be between 1994-

> 1997.

> -- Yes. June 1996.

> > ix. Is your husband self-employed or the work that he has has

> overseas connections.

> -- Both husband and I are employed in US. He has lost a few jobs

> before. He is in IT sales/recruiting.

> > x. Finally, do you have problems with your teeth.

> -- Yes. Lots of problems. I have many partial dentures, my teeth

are

> extra sensitive to pain and I have had quite a few painful

> extrations/teeth work.

> >

> > regards,

> >

> > Manoj

> >

> > Jagannathan Kapisthalam <jagannathankr@> wrote:

> > Respected Mona_Khadilkar,

> > Things will take shape after 22-7-2006 and within a

> weeks.time.Please write to me afterwards for further analysis of

> course free of cost..

> > Regards,

> > jagannathan.

> >

> >

> >

> > On 7/20/06, mona_khadilkar <mona_khadilkar@>

> wrote: Respected teachers on this forum -

> > I am in great duress. Please help me. I am at that stage in my

life

> > where most people want stability, security and life of dignity.

But

> > fate has something else stored for me I guess.I desperately need

> your

> > help and advice. What should I do ? All these years I have not

> taken

> > any decision, life announced its decisions upon me and I

accepted.

> I

> > put on a mask everyday of my life of what a happy and cosy life I

> lead.

> > I do not like to wash my dirty linen(which is my husband's)in

> public.

> > But I am not sure if I can continue this act anymore. My husband

> has

> > filed for divorce. I am totally broken within. Is there any hope

> for

> > me? What about my children ?

> > Sincere thanks.

> > Mona.

> > ---------------------------

> > Details:

> > 11th Oct 1971, Bombay(India), 9:15 am.

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> > See the all-new, redesigned .com. Check it out.

> >

>

 

 

 

 

 

See the all-new, redesigned .com. Check it out.

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Share on other sites
Guest guest

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Posted
Posted

Manojji -

 

Did you rectify my birth chart according to the evnts I gave you ? Is

my 9:15 am timing correct or is it earlier/later per the evnts ?

 

Is my fate really so bad ?

Please let me know.

Thanks,

Mona

valist, Manoj Kumar <mouji99 wrote:

>

> Dear Mona ji,

>

> I am sorry, I have little hope for you. Some elders in the family

may get involved for helping the situation. I see movement in your

case in October, 2006. I would request you to offer sincere prayers

to Lord Shiva.

>

> Best wishes,

>

> Manoj

>

> mona_khadilkar <mona_khadilkar wrote:

> Also, I wanted to add that my parents (esp. mother) are

not happy

> about the divorce situation and think I should do whatever it takes

> to save the marriage for kids sake. To save everyone from shame and

> disgrace. I have a very hard time understanding their notion,

because

> I have already suffered enough all these years when my husband has

> treated me like garbage, mostly comparing me with other american

> women. How can I forget all that ? And all his betrayal when I was

so

> honest and loyal and hardworking ? I am living like a roommate in

my

> own house, and not getting in his way at all. He leads seperate

life

> and I lead seperate life. I do not question him anything. I do

> sincerely my job and come home to my kids. He is also attached to

> kids but often has made it very clear to me that he does not need

me

> in his life. Should I still beg and plead with him to not divorce

and

> continue this act for kids sake ?

>

> I wanted him to prove to me that he really needs me. And he wants

to

> not discuss anything. Just continue our parallel lives. He wants

kids

> to be brought up American way just like he himself has become. He

> does not attend any Indian social function with me. I like jhansi

ki

> raani take my kids everywhere and go alone. People have also

started

> asking me why I go alone everywhere and why my husband doesn't come.

>

> Despite all this my parents still think, I should give in and beg

him

> to stay together for children sake because otherwise I will have no

> one in this world after they are gone and life will be very

difficult

> for single mother. Even if someone marries me again, that will be

> worse becasue the new person will never want my children. So its

> better to compromise and live with my husband only.

>

> I am very distressed and afraid of husband, mother, world, my age,

my

> small children and everything. I just do not know how long I will

> continue to live a life of fear and still raise my kids.

> Is my life over ? Do I hv no right to dream of happy life ?

>

> valist, "mona_khadilkar" <mona_khadilkar@>

> wrote:

> >

> > Dear Manojji and Jagannathji -

> > Thank you for your prompt replies.

> > I want to go back to India to raise my kids with my parents

support.

> > I do not know how much more life I have to live, but I only pray

> that

> > God be merciful enough to letme lead a life of self respect and

> > dignity. And be able to bring up my children with good values.

> > WIll moving back to India be a good decision for me ? I dont know

> if

> > I can continue in US after divorce after all the emotional

turmoil

> > that I have gone through in my marriage. But at same time I am

also

> > worried if life will be worse for me in India after divorce ?

Also

> > will I be financially secure ? Do I need to work all throughout

my

> > life or can I take a break in job during my transition to India?

> >

> > Jagannathji, I will write to you in one week's time again.

> > Manoj ji, here are answers to your questions.

> > Thank you once again for all your advise and guidance.

> > Mona

> > valist, Manoj Kumar <mouji99@> wrote:

> > >

> > > Dear Mona,

> > >

> > > A slight change in time can alter your horoscope.

> > >

> > > Kindly answer following questions to verify the horoscope.

> > >

> > > i. Are you the eldest or youngest amongst sisters in your

> family.

> > -- Yes. Only child of my parents.

> > > ii. The total number of brothers and sisters are two or five.

> > -- 0. My mother had to undergo an abortion due to in-laws

trouble.

> > She was pregnant for second time when I was 3 months old.

> > > iii. Was the married life of your parents also disturbed.

> > -- Extremely distrubed. In-Laws issues and my mothers short

temper.

> > > iv. Was there any problem to your mother at the time of your

> > birth or were you a Caeserian birth

> > -- No. Labour was for 6 - 8 hrs. Normal delivery.

> > > v. did you marry after 1991.

> > -- Yes

> > > vi. do you have two children

> > -- Yes. First boy and then girl

> > > vii. Was your education in areas of finance like commerce etc.

> or

> > general humanities.

> > -- No. Engineering degree(electronics) and in software industry

all

> > throughout.

> > > viii. Most likely period of marriage seems to be between 1994-

> > 1997.

> > -- Yes. June 1996.

> > > ix. Is your husband self-employed or the work that he has has

> > overseas connections.

> > -- Both husband and I are employed in US. He has lost a few jobs

> > before. He is in IT sales/recruiting.

> > > x. Finally, do you have problems with your teeth.

> > -- Yes. Lots of problems. I have many partial dentures, my teeth

> are

> > extra sensitive to pain and I have had quite a few painful

> > extrations/teeth work.

> > >

> > > regards,

> > >

> > > Manoj

> > >

> > > Jagannathan Kapisthalam <jagannathankr@> wrote:

> > > Respected Mona_Khadilkar,

> > > Things will take shape after 22-7-2006 and within a

> > weeks.time.Please write to me afterwards for further analysis of

> > course free of cost..

> > > Regards,

> > > jagannathan.

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > > On 7/20/06, mona_khadilkar <mona_khadilkar@>

> > wrote: Respected teachers on this forum -

> > > I am in great duress. Please help me. I am at that stage in my

> life

> > > where most people want stability, security and life of dignity.

> But

> > > fate has something else stored for me I guess.I desperately

need

> > your

> > > help and advice. What should I do ? All these years I have not

> > taken

> > > any decision, life announced its decisions upon me and I

> accepted.

> > I

> > > put on a mask everyday of my life of what a happy and cosy life

I

> > lead.

> > > I do not like to wash my dirty linen(which is my husband's)in

> > public.

> > > But I am not sure if I can continue this act anymore. My

husband

> > has

> > > filed for divorce. I am totally broken within. Is there any

hope

> > for

> > > me? What about my children ?

> > > Sincere thanks.

> > > Mona.

> > > ---------------------------

> > > Details:

> > > 11th Oct 1971, Bombay(India), 9:15 am.

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > > See the all-new, redesigned .com. Check it out.

> > >

> >

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

> See the all-new, redesigned .com. Check it out.

>

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Posted
Posted

Dear Mona,

 

Your birth time needs rectification. You were born in Libra ascendent.

 

I do not see a divorce, but only separation. Things will improve in your favor from november'06 onwards. Career growth too at the same time.

 

You will not go back and settle in India, but will end up in US only.

 

A simple way is to accept your husband as he is. If he does not attend Indian functions, do not force him to do so.

 

You are also at a lot of fault here. Your husband alone cannot be blamed. You have always wanted things to move your way, even though you do not show such desires openly.

 

The enemy always lies within. Catch it and conquer it. Once you have done that the world will change for you.

 

Regards,

 

Ashutosh

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

-

Manoj Kumar

valist

Friday, 21 July, 2006 18:39

Re: Is there divorce in my fate ? What will become of me and my children ?

 

 

 

Dear Mona ji,

 

I am sorry, I have little hope for you. Some elders in the family may get involved for helping the situation. I see movement in your case in October, 2006. I would request you to offer sincere prayers to Lord Shiva.

 

Best wishes,

 

Manoj

 

mona_khadilkar <mona_khadilkar > wrote:

Also, I wanted to add that my parents (esp. mother) are not happy

about the divorce situation and think I should do whatever it takes

to save the marriage for kids sake. To save everyone from shame and

disgrace. I have a very hard time understanding their notion, because

I have already suffered enough all these years when my husband has

treated me like garbage, mostly comparing me with other american

women. How can I forget all that ? And all his betrayal when I was so

honest and loyal and hardworking ? I am living like a roommate in my

own house, and not getting in his way at all. He leads seperate life

and I lead seperate life. I do not question him anything. I do

sincerely my job and come home to my kids. He is also attached to

kids but often has made it very clear to me that he does not need me

in his life. Should I still beg and plead with him to not divorce and

continue this act for kids sake ?

 

I wanted him to prove to me that he really needs me. And he wants to

not discuss anything. Just continue our parallel lives. He wants kids

to be brought up American way just like he himself has become. He

does not attend any Indian social function with me. I like jhansi ki

raani take my kids everywhere and go alone. People have also started

asking me why I go alone everywhere and why my husband doesn't come.

 

Despite all this my parents still think, I should give in and beg him

to stay together for children sake because otherwise I will have no

one in this world after they are gone and life will be very difficult

for single mother. Even if someone marries me again, that will be

worse becasue the new person will never want my children. So its

better to compromise and live with my husband only.

 

I am very distressed and afraid of husband, mother, world, my age, my

small children and everything. I just do not know how long I will

continue to live a life of fear and still raise my kids.

Is my life over ? Do I hv no right to dream of happy life ?

 

valist, "mona_khadilkar" <mona_khadilkar

wrote:

>

> Dear Manojji and Jagannathji -

> Thank you for your prompt replies.

> I want to go back to India to raise my kids with my parents support.

> I do not know how much more life I have to live, but I only pray

that

> God be merciful enough to letme lead a life of self respect and

> dignity. And be able to bring up my children with good values.

> WIll moving back to India be a good decision for me ? I dont know

if

> I can continue in US after divorce after all the emotional turmoil

> that I have gone through in my marriage. But at same time I am also

> worried if life will be worse for me in India after divorce ? Also

> will I be financially secure ? Do I need to work all throughout my

> life or can I take a break in job during my transition to India?

>

> Jagannathji, I will write to you in one week's time again.

> Manoj ji, here are answers to your questions.

> Thank you once again for all your advise and guidance.

> Mona

> valist, Manoj Kumar <mouji99@> wrote:

> >

> > Dear Mona,

> >

> > A slight change in time can alter your horoscope.

> >

> > Kindly answer following questions to verify the horoscope.

> >

> > i. Are you the eldest or youngest amongst sisters in your

family.

> -- Yes. Only child of my parents.

> > ii. The total number of brothers and sisters are two or five.

> -- 0. My mother had to undergo an abortion due to in-laws trouble.

> She was pregnant for second time when I was 3 months old.

> > iii. Was the married life of your parents also disturbed.

> -- Extremely distrubed. In-Laws issues and my mothers short temper.

> > iv. Was there any problem to your mother at the time of your

> birth or were you a Caeserian birth

> -- No. Labour was for 6 - 8 hrs. Normal delivery.

> > v. did you marry after 1991.

> -- Yes

> > vi. do you have two children

> -- Yes. First boy and then girl

> > vii. Was your education in areas of finance like commerce etc.

or

> general humanities.

> -- No. Engineering degree(electronics) and in software industry all

> throughout.

> > viii. Most likely period of marriage seems to be between 1994-

> 1997.

> -- Yes. June 1996.

> > ix. Is your husband self-employed or the work that he has has

> overseas connections.

> -- Both husband and I are employed in US. He has lost a few jobs

> before. He is in IT sales/recruiting.

> > x. Finally, do you have problems with your teeth.

> -- Yes. Lots of problems. I have many partial dentures, my teeth

are

> extra sensitive to pain and I have had quite a few painful

> extrations/teeth work.

> >

> > regards,

> >

> > Manoj

> >

> > Jagannathan Kapisthalam <jagannathankr@> wrote:

> > Respected Mona_Khadilkar,

> > Things will take shape after 22-7-2006 and within a

> weeks.time.Please write to me afterwards for further analysis of

> course free of cost..

> > Regards,

> > jagannathan.

> >

> >

> >

> > On 7/20/06, mona_khadilkar <mona_khadilkar@>

> wrote: Respected teachers on this forum -

> > I am in great duress. Please help me. I am at that stage in my

life

> > where most people want stability, security and life of dignity.

But

> > fate has something else stored for me I guess.I desperately need

> your

> > help and advice. What should I do ? All these years I have not

> taken

> > any decision, life announced its decisions upon me and I

accepted.

> I

> > put on a mask everyday of my life of what a happy and cosy life I

> lead.

> > I do not like to wash my dirty linen(which is my husband's)in

> public.

> > But I am not sure if I can continue this act anymore. My husband

> has

> > filed for divorce. I am totally broken within. Is there any hope

> for

> > me? What about my children ?

> > Sincere thanks.

> > Mona.

> > ---------------------------

> > Details:

> > 11th Oct 1971, Bombay(India), 9:15 am.

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> > See the all-new, redesigned .com. Check it out.

> >

>

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

See the all-new, redesigned .com. Check it out.

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Posted
Posted

Dear Mona ji,

Since most of your answers were in yes I will take the birth time as more or less correct.

regards,

Manoj

 

mona_khadilkar <mona_khadilkar > wrote:

Manojji -

 

Did you rectify my birth chart according to the evnts I gave you ? Is

my 9:15 am timing correct or is it earlier/later per the evnts ?

 

Is my fate really so bad ?

Please let me know.

Thanks,

Mona

valist, Manoj Kumar <mouji99 wrote:

>

> Dear Mona ji,

>

> I am sorry, I have little hope for you. Some elders in the family

may get involved for helping the situation. I see movement in your

case in October, 2006. I would request you to offer sincere prayers

to Lord Shiva.

>

> Best wishes,

>

> Manoj

>

> mona_khadilkar <mona_khadilkar wrote:

> Also, I wanted to add that my parents (esp. mother) are

not happy

> about the divorce situation and think I should do whatever it takes

> to save the marriage for kids sake. To save everyone from shame and

> disgrace. I have a very hard time understanding their notion,

because

> I have already suffered enough all these years when my husband has

> treated me like garbage, mostly comparing me with other american

> women. How can I forget all that ? And all his betrayal when I was

so

> honest and loyal and hardworking ? I am living like a roommate in

my

> own house, and not getting in his way at all. He leads seperate

life

> and I lead seperate life. I do not question him anything. I do

> sincerely my job and come home to my kids. He is also attached to

> kids but often has made it very clear to me that he does not need

me

> in his life. Should I still beg and plead with him to not divorce

and

> continue this act for kids sake ?

>

> I wanted him to prove to me that he really needs me. And he wants

to

> not discuss anything. Just continue our parallel lives. He wants

kids

> to be brought up American way just like he himself has become. He

> does not attend any Indian social function with me. I like jhansi

ki

> raani take my kids everywhere and go alone. People have also

started

> asking me why I go alone everywhere and why my husband doesn't come.

>

> Despite all this my parents still think, I should give in and beg

him

> to stay together for children sake because otherwise I will have no

> one in this world after they are gone and life will be very

difficult

> for single mother. Even if someone marries me again, that will be

> worse becasue the new person will never want my children. So its

> better to compromise and live with my husband only.

>

> I am very distressed and afraid of husband, mother, world, my age,

my

> small children and everything. I just do not know how long I will

> continue to live a life of fear and still raise my kids.

> Is my life over ? Do I hv no right to dream of happy life ?

>

> valist, "mona_khadilkar" <mona_khadilkar@>

> wrote:

> >

> > Dear Manojji and Jagannathji -

> > Thank you for your prompt replies.

> > I want to go back to India to raise my kids with my parents

support.

> > I do not know how much more life I have to live, but I only pray

> that

> > God be merciful enough to letme lead a life of self respect and

> > dignity. And be able to bring up my children with good values.

> > WIll moving back to India be a good decision for me ? I dont know

> if

> > I can continue in US after divorce after all the emotional

turmoil

> > that I have gone through in my marriage. But at same time I am

also

> > worried if life will be worse for me in India after divorce ?

Also

> > will I be financially secure ? Do I need to work all throughout

my

> > life or can I take a break in job during my transition to India?

> >

> > Jagannathji, I will write to you in one week's time again.

> > Manoj ji, here are answers to your questions.

> > Thank you once again for all your advise and guidance.

> > Mona

> > valist, Manoj Kumar <mouji99@> wrote:

> > >

> > > Dear Mona,

> > >

> > > A slight change in time can alter your horoscope.

> > >

> > > Kindly answer following questions to verify the horoscope.

> > >

> > > i. Are you the eldest or youngest amongst sisters in your

> family.

> > -- Yes. Only child of my parents.

> > > ii. The total number of brothers and sisters are two or five.

> > -- 0. My mother had to undergo an abortion due to in-laws

trouble.

> > She was pregnant for second time when I was 3 months old.

> > > iii. Was the married life of your parents also disturbed.

> > -- Extremely distrubed. In-Laws issues and my mothers short

temper.

> > > iv. Was there any problem to your mother at the time of your

> > birth or were you a Caeserian birth

> > -- No. Labour was for 6 - 8 hrs. Normal delivery.

> > > v. did you marry after 1991.

> > -- Yes

> > > vi. do you have two children

> > -- Yes. First boy and then girl

> > > vii. Was your education in areas of finance like commerce etc.

> or

> > general humanities.

> > -- No. Engineering degree(electronics) and in software industry

all

> > throughout.

> > > viii. Most likely period of marriage seems to be between 1994-

> > 1997.

> > -- Yes. June 1996.

> > > ix. Is your husband self-employed or the work that he has has

> > overseas connections.

> > -- Both husband and I are employed in US. He has lost a few jobs

> > before. He is in IT sales/recruiting.

> > > x. Finally, do you have problems with your teeth.

> > -- Yes. Lots of problems. I have many partial dentures, my teeth

> are

> > extra sensitive to pain and I have had quite a few painful

> > extrations/teeth work.

> > >

> > > regards,

> > >

> > > Manoj

> > >

> > > Jagannathan Kapisthalam <jagannathankr@> wrote:

> > > Respected Mona_Khadilkar,

> > > Things will take shape after 22-7-2006 and within a

> > weeks.time.Please write to me afterwards for further analysis of

> > course free of cost..

> > > Regards,

> > > jagannathan.

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > > On 7/20/06, mona_khadilkar <mona_khadilkar@>

> > wrote: Respected teachers on this forum -

> > > I am in great duress. Please help me. I am at that stage in my

> life

> > > where most people want stability, security and life of dignity.

> But

> > > fate has something else stored for me I guess.I desperately

need

> > your

> > > help and advice. What should I do ? All these years I have not

> > taken

> > > any decision, life announced its decisions upon me and I

> accepted.

> > I

> > > put on a mask everyday of my life of what a happy and cosy life

I

> > lead.

> > > I do not like to wash my dirty linen(which is my husband's)in

> > public.

> > > But I am not sure if I can continue this act anymore. My

husband

> > has

> > > filed for divorce. I am totally broken within. Is there any

hope

> > for

> > > me? What about my children ?

> > > Sincere thanks.

> > > Mona.

> > > ---------------------------

> > > Details:

> > > 11th Oct 1971, Bombay(India), 9:15 am.

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > > See the all-new, redesigned .com. Check it out.

> > >

> >

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

> See the all-new, redesigned .com. Check it out.

>

 

 

 

 

 

Music Unlimited - Access over 1 million songs.Try it free.

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Posted
Posted

Dear Ashutosh ji and all advisors..

 

I am really grateful for all the responses. Some were +ve and some -

ve, so I am still confused. Most of you seem to think my Vrishchik

lagna and Jupiter in first house will save my marriage.

 

Also Ashutoshji wrote that my usband is not entirely to be blamed for

his actions. I do agree that I have a temper and like things to go my

way (which generally are ways to benefit my family). I hv been

selfish in that I hv wanted my husband for myself, devoted to me and

striving for the betterment of out small family to give our fmily a

stable and secure future. I loved him dearly and was literally "under

his spell" .. so mesmerized by his looks, his sleek ways and his

charms.... until I found out with proof that he used all his good

looks and charms to get other women.

 

Please tell me, does any of my temper, tantrums (and my husband too

has a very nasty temper and is extremely vindictive), or actions

deserve me to be cheated by my husband ? He had an affair with a

married american woman which began when i ws pregnant with my second

daughter and continued right until the time that I found out (with

evidence) when she turned a year old. And when I look back at all the

10 years of my marriage, I am almost certain my husband has been with

other women right since the time of our marriage.

 

Am I to blame for all his actions ? And is he justified ? And should

I still accept him ? You wrote about my "enemy within"... yes I have

a very deep deep hurt. My sould has been murdered. I got betrayal for

my loyalty and love.

 

Ashutoshji, kindly please tell me how should I kill my enemy within

which is my wounded soul/ego/womanhood and accept my husband ? I

honestly want to accept him for sake of my children and our family

reputation. But please please show me a way how to erase those wounds

and memories ? I will gladly follow any advice which will assure me

my memories and hurt will be erased .... I do many religious things

these days...

 

I was raised as a brahmin girl with all brahmin customs, no non-veg,

prayers, education, culture... I gave it all up after marriage to

please my husband because he was very western and i always wanted to

impress him. I started eating and cooking non-veg, giving him company

in occassional drinks, wearing western outfits and heavy makeup....

and just when I was fat and out of shape with my pregnancy, he

stabbed me in the back.... how should i forget that ?

 

I have gone back to being a pure vegetarian. No drinks (even

occassional for company). No heavy makeup. I go to temple frequently

and devote most of my time to kids apart from work and cooking.

 

I have been "searching" for answers for the past 18 months to nurse

my wounded heart and soul. I dont think there is any medicine in this

world to heal my soul. I sometimes fear I will die with a broken and

hurting soul which will haunt me in my next life too.

 

I really want to close the karmic account between me and my husband

in this life itself. Somehow I think if I do not close this account,

it will haunt me life after life. Because he has hurt me so badly in

this life, and I cannot do anything about it (because no revenge is

going to be enough for the amount of pain/deprivation/depression he

has caused me), I might have to carry it on in my next birth to get

even with him. And I honestly honestly dont want that.......

 

I am one sorry soul stuck in a chakravyuh! Self pity is all I have

for myself and I hate it.

 

- Mona

 

 

 

valist, "astrologerashutosh"

<astrologerashutosh wrote:

>

> Dear Mona,

>

> Your birth time needs rectification. You were

born in Libra ascendent.

>

> I do not see a divorce, but only separation. Things will

improve in your favor from november'06 onwards. Career growth too at

the same time.

>

> You will not go back and settle in India, but will end up

in US only.

>

> A simple way is to accept your husband as he is. If he does

not attend Indian functions, do not force him to do so.

>

> You are also at a lot of fault here. Your husband alone

cannot be blamed. You have always wanted things to move your way,

even though you do not show such desires openly.

>

>

> The enemy always lies within. Catch it and conquer it. Once you

have done that the world will change for you.

>

> Regards,

>

> Ashutosh

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

> -

> Manoj Kumar

> valist

> Friday, 21 July, 2006 18:39

> Re: Is there divorce in my fate ? What will become

of me and my children ?

>

>

>

> Dear Mona ji,

>

> I am sorry, I have little hope for you. Some elders in the family

may get involved for helping the situation. I see movement in your

case in October, 2006. I would request you to offer sincere prayers

to Lord Shiva.

>

> Best wishes,

>

> Manoj

>

> mona_khadilkar <mona_khadilkar wrote:

> Also, I wanted to add that my parents (esp. mother) are not

happy

> about the divorce situation and think I should do whatever it

takes

> to save the marriage for kids sake. To save everyone from shame

and

> disgrace. I have a very hard time understanding their notion,

because

> I have already suffered enough all these years when my husband

has

> treated me like garbage, mostly comparing me with other

american

> women. How can I forget all that ? And all his betrayal when I

was so

> honest and loyal and hardworking ? I am living like a roommate

in my

> own house, and not getting in his way at all. He leads seperate

life

> and I lead seperate life. I do not question him anything. I do

> sincerely my job and come home to my kids. He is also attached

to

> kids but often has made it very clear to me that he does not

need me

> in his life. Should I still beg and plead with him to not

divorce and

> continue this act for kids sake ?

>

> I wanted him to prove to me that he really needs me. And he

wants to

> not discuss anything. Just continue our parallel lives. He

wants kids

> to be brought up American way just like he himself has become.

He

> does not attend any Indian social function with me. I like

jhansi ki

> raani take my kids everywhere and go alone. People have also

started

> asking me why I go alone everywhere and why my husband doesn't

come.

>

> Despite all this my parents still think, I should give in and

beg him

> to stay together for children sake because otherwise I will

have no

> one in this world after they are gone and life will be very

difficult

> for single mother. Even if someone marries me again, that will

be

> worse becasue the new person will never want my children. So

its

> better to compromise and live with my husband only.

>

> I am very distressed and afraid of husband, mother, world, my

age, my

> small children and everything. I just do not know how long I

will

> continue to live a life of fear and still raise my kids.

> Is my life over ? Do I hv no right to dream of happy life ?

>

> valist, "mona_khadilkar"

<mona_khadilkar@>

> wrote:

> >

> > Dear Manojji and Jagannathji -

> > Thank you for your prompt replies.

> > I want to go back to India to raise my kids with my parents

support.

> > I do not know how much more life I have to live, but I only

pray

> that

> > God be merciful enough to letme lead a life of self respect

and

> > dignity. And be able to bring up my children with good values.

> > WIll moving back to India be a good decision for me ? I dont

know

> if

> > I can continue in US after divorce after all the emotional

turmoil

> > that I have gone through in my marriage. But at same time I

am also

> > worried if life will be worse for me in India after divorce ?

Also

> > will I be financially secure ? Do I need to work all

throughout my

> > life or can I take a break in job during my transition to

India?

> >

> > Jagannathji, I will write to you in one week's time again.

> > Manoj ji, here are answers to your questions.

> > Thank you once again for all your advise and guidance.

> > Mona

> > valist, Manoj Kumar <mouji99@> wrote:

> > >

> > > Dear Mona,

> > >

> > > A slight change in time can alter your horoscope.

> > >

> > > Kindly answer following questions to verify the horoscope.

> > >

> > > i. Are you the eldest or youngest amongst sisters in your

> family.

> > -- Yes. Only child of my parents.

> > > ii. The total number of brothers and sisters are two or

five.

> > -- 0. My mother had to undergo an abortion due to in-laws

trouble.

> > She was pregnant for second time when I was 3 months old.

> > > iii. Was the married life of your parents also disturbed.

> > -- Extremely distrubed. In-Laws issues and my mothers short

temper.

> > > iv. Was there any problem to your mother at the time of

your

> > birth or were you a Caeserian birth

> > -- No. Labour was for 6 - 8 hrs. Normal delivery.

> > > v. did you marry after 1991.

> > -- Yes

> > > vi. do you have two children

> > -- Yes. First boy and then girl

> > > vii. Was your education in areas of finance like commerce

etc.

> or

> > general humanities.

> > -- No. Engineering degree(electronics) and in software

industry all

> > throughout.

> > > viii. Most likely period of marriage seems to be between

1994-

> > 1997.

> > -- Yes. June 1996.

> > > ix. Is your husband self-employed or the work that he has

has

> > overseas connections.

> > -- Both husband and I are employed in US. He has lost a few

jobs

> > before. He is in IT sales/recruiting.

> > > x. Finally, do you have problems with your teeth.

> > -- Yes. Lots of problems. I have many partial dentures, my

teeth

> are

> > extra sensitive to pain and I have had quite a few painful

> > extrations/teeth work.

> > >

> > > regards,

> > >

> > > Manoj

> > >

> > > Jagannathan Kapisthalam <jagannathankr@> wrote:

> > > Respected Mona_Khadilkar,

> > > Things will take shape after 22-7-2006 and within a

> > weeks.time.Please write to me afterwards for further analysis

of

> > course free of cost..

> > > Regards,

> > > jagannathan.

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > > On 7/20/06, mona_khadilkar <mona_khadilkar@>

> > wrote: Respected teachers on this forum -

> > > I am in great duress. Please help me. I am at that stage in

my

> life

> > > where most people want stability, security and life of

dignity.

> But

> > > fate has something else stored for me I guess.I desperately

need

> > your

> > > help and advice. What should I do ? All these years I have

not

> > taken

> > > any decision, life announced its decisions upon me and I

> accepted.

> > I

> > > put on a mask everyday of my life of what a happy and cosy

life I

> > lead.

> > > I do not like to wash my dirty linen(which is my husband's)

in

> > public.

> > > But I am not sure if I can continue this act anymore. My

husband

> > has

> > > filed for divorce. I am totally broken within. Is there any

hope

> > for

> > > me? What about my children ?

> > > Sincere thanks.

> > > Mona.

> > > ---------------------------

> > > Details:

> > > 11th Oct 1971, Bombay(India), 9:15 am.

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > > See the all-new, redesigned .com. Check it out.

> > >

> >

>

>

>

>

>

>

> --

----------

> See the all-new, redesigned .com. Check it out.

>

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Posted
Posted

Dear Mona,

 

I will take the liberty of quoting you to explain how the enemy within works: You wrote:

 

"I hv been

selfish in that I hv wanted my husband for myself, devoted to me and

striving for the betterment of out small family to give our fmily a

stable and secure future. I loved him dearly and was literally "under

his spell" .. so mesmerized by his looks, his sleek ways and his

charms.... until I found out with proof that he used all his good

looks and charms to get other women."

 

 

You always suspected that he was not truthfull, but you refused to believe it untill you found out. You yourself had tied the blindfold on your eyes.

 

There is no use lamenting what he did. He did not change after marriage, he was always like that, only you did not accept it in time.

 

He will never change, whatever you do. Leaving your own prefered ideologies and lifestyles for him was another mistake. You must have thought that you will be able to understand him better that way and guide him according to what you desire in your married life.

 

Rather than indulging in self pity, try to think rationally and stop believing anyone at face value. In relationships, it is better to be cautious than to be sorry. Believe in the phrase, "guilty untill proven innocent."

 

Love is not a panacea for all cures. But, It is a good distractor from reality.

 

One who is prepared for the worst gets the best of all things.

 

Regards,

 

Ashutosh

 

 

 

 

 

-

mona_khadilkar

valist

Monday, 24 July, 2006 06:57

Re: Is there divorce in my fate ? What will become of me and my children ?

 

 

Dear Ashutosh ji and all advisors..

 

I am really grateful for all the responses. Some were +ve and some -

ve, so I am still confused. Most of you seem to think my Vrishchik

lagna and Jupiter in first house will save my marriage.

 

Also Ashutoshji wrote that my usband is not entirely to be blamed for

his actions. I do agree that I have a temper and like things to go my

way (which generally are ways to benefit my family). I hv been

selfish in that I hv wanted my husband for myself, devoted to me and

striving for the betterment of out small family to give our fmily a

stable and secure future. I loved him dearly and was literally "under

his spell" .. so mesmerized by his looks, his sleek ways and his

charms.... until I found out with proof that he used all his good

looks and charms to get other women.

 

Please tell me, does any of my temper, tantrums (and my husband too

has a very nasty temper and is extremely vindictive), or actions

deserve me to be cheated by my husband ? He had an affair with a

married american woman which began when i ws pregnant with my second

daughter and continued right until the time that I found out (with

evidence) when she turned a year old. And when I look back at all the

10 years of my marriage, I am almost certain my husband has been with

other women right since the time of our marriage.

 

Am I to blame for all his actions ? And is he justified ? And should

I still accept him ? You wrote about my "enemy within"... yes I have

a very deep deep hurt. My sould has been murdered. I got betrayal for

my loyalty and love.

 

Ashutoshji, kindly please tell me how should I kill my enemy within

which is my wounded soul/ego/womanhood and accept my husband ? I

honestly want to accept him for sake of my children and our family

reputation. But please please show me a way how to erase those wounds

and memories ? I will gladly follow any advice which will assure me

my memories and hurt will be erased .... I do many religious things

these days...

 

I was raised as a brahmin girl with all brahmin customs, no non-veg,

prayers, education, culture... I gave it all up after marriage to

please my husband because he was very western and i always wanted to

impress him. I started eating and cooking non-veg, giving him company

in occassional drinks, wearing western outfits and heavy makeup....

and just when I was fat and out of shape with my pregnancy, he

stabbed me in the back.... how should i forget that ?

 

I have gone back to being a pure vegetarian. No drinks (even

occassional for company). No heavy makeup. I go to temple frequently

and devote most of my time to kids apart from work and cooking.

 

I have been "searching" for answers for the past 18 months to nurse

my wounded heart and soul. I dont think there is any medicine in this

world to heal my soul. I sometimes fear I will die with a broken and

hurting soul which will haunt me in my next life too.

 

I really want to close the karmic account between me and my husband

in this life itself. Somehow I think if I do not close this account,

it will haunt me life after life. Because he has hurt me so badly in

this life, and I cannot do anything about it (because no revenge is

going to be enough for the amount of pain/deprivation/depression he

has caused me), I might have to carry it on in my next birth to get

even with him. And I honestly honestly dont want that.......

 

I am one sorry soul stuck in a chakravyuh! Self pity is all I have

for myself and I hate it.

 

- Mona

 

valist, "astrologerashutosh"

<astrologerashutosh wrote:

>

> Dear Mona,

>

> Your birth time needs rectification. You were

born in Libra ascendent.

>

> I do not see a divorce, but only separation. Things will

improve in your favor from november'06 onwards. Career growth too at

the same time.

>

> You will not go back and settle in India, but will end up

in US only.

>

> A simple way is to accept your husband as he is. If he does

not attend Indian functions, do not force him to do so.

>

> You are also at a lot of fault here. Your husband alone

cannot be blamed. You have always wanted things to move your way,

even though you do not show such desires openly.

>

>

> The enemy always lies within. Catch it and conquer it. Once you

have done that the world will change for you.

>

> Regards,

>

> Ashutosh

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

> -

> Manoj Kumar

> valist

> Friday, 21 July, 2006 18:39

> Re: Is there divorce in my fate ? What will become

of me and my children ?

>

>

>

> Dear Mona ji,

>

> I am sorry, I have little hope for you. Some elders in the family

may get involved for helping the situation. I see movement in your

case in October, 2006. I would request you to offer sincere prayers

to Lord Shiva.

>

> Best wishes,

>

> Manoj

>

> mona_khadilkar <mona_khadilkar wrote:

> Also, I wanted to add that my parents (esp. mother) are not

happy

> about the divorce situation and think I should do whatever it

takes

> to save the marriage for kids sake. To save everyone from shame

and

> disgrace. I have a very hard time understanding their notion,

because

> I have already suffered enough all these years when my husband

has

> treated me like garbage, mostly comparing me with other

american

> women. How can I forget all that ? And all his betrayal when I

was so

> honest and loyal and hardworking ? I am living like a roommate

in my

> own house, and not getting in his way at all. He leads seperate

life

> and I lead seperate life. I do not question him anything. I do

> sincerely my job and come home to my kids. He is also attached

to

> kids but often has made it very clear to me that he does not

need me

> in his life. Should I still beg and plead with him to not

divorce and

> continue this act for kids sake ?

>

> I wanted him to prove to me that he really needs me. And he

wants to

> not discuss anything. Just continue our parallel lives. He

wants kids

> to be brought up American way just like he himself has become.

He

> does not attend any Indian social function with me. I like

jhansi ki

> raani take my kids everywhere and go alone. People have also

started

> asking me why I go alone everywhere and why my husband doesn't

come.

>

> Despite all this my parents still think, I should give in and

beg him

> to stay together for children sake because otherwise I will

have no

> one in this world after they are gone and life will be very

difficult

> for single mother. Even if someone marries me again, that will

be

> worse becasue the new person will never want my children. So

its

> better to compromise and live with my husband only.

>

> I am very distressed and afraid of husband, mother, world, my

age, my

> small children and everything. I just do not know how long I

will

> continue to live a life of fear and still raise my kids.

> Is my life over ? Do I hv no right to dream of happy life ?

>

> valist, "mona_khadilkar"

<mona_khadilkar@>

> wrote:

> >

> > Dear Manojji and Jagannathji -

> > Thank you for your prompt replies.

> > I want to go back to India to raise my kids with my parents

support.

> > I do not know how much more life I have to live, but I only

pray

> that

> > God be merciful enough to letme lead a life of self respect

and

> > dignity. And be able to bring up my children with good values.

> > WIll moving back to India be a good decision for me ? I dont

know

> if

> > I can continue in US after divorce after all the emotional

turmoil

> > that I have gone through in my marriage. But at same time I

am also

> > worried if life will be worse for me in India after divorce ?

Also

> > will I be financially secure ? Do I need to work all

throughout my

> > life or can I take a break in job during my transition to

India?

> >

> > Jagannathji, I will write to you in one week's time again.

> > Manoj ji, here are answers to your questions.

> > Thank you once again for all your advise and guidance.

> > Mona

> > valist, Manoj Kumar <mouji99@> wrote:

> > >

> > > Dear Mona,

> > >

> > > A slight change in time can alter your horoscope.

> > >

> > > Kindly answer following questions to verify the horoscope.

> > >

> > > i. Are you the eldest or youngest amongst sisters in your

> family.

> > -- Yes. Only child of my parents.

> > > ii. The total number of brothers and sisters are two or

five.

> > -- 0. My mother had to undergo an abortion due to in-laws

trouble.

> > She was pregnant for second time when I was 3 months old.

> > > iii. Was the married life of your parents also disturbed.

> > -- Extremely distrubed. In-Laws issues and my mothers short

temper.

> > > iv. Was there any problem to your mother at the time of

your

> > birth or were you a Caeserian birth

> > -- No. Labour was for 6 - 8 hrs. Normal delivery.

> > > v. did you marry after 1991.

> > -- Yes

> > > vi. do you have two children

> > -- Yes. First boy and then girl

> > > vii. Was your education in areas of finance like commerce

etc.

> or

> > general humanities.

> > -- No. Engineering degree(electronics) and in software

industry all

> > throughout.

> > > viii. Most likely period of marriage seems to be between

1994-

> > 1997.

> > -- Yes. June 1996.

> > > ix. Is your husband self-employed or the work that he has

has

> > overseas connections.

> > -- Both husband and I are employed in US. He has lost a few

jobs

> > before. He is in IT sales/recruiting.

> > > x. Finally, do you have problems with your teeth.

> > -- Yes. Lots of problems. I have many partial dentures, my

teeth

> are

> > extra sensitive to pain and I have had quite a few painful

> > extrations/teeth work.

> > >

> > > regards,

> > >

> > > Manoj

> > >

> > > Jagannathan Kapisthalam <jagannathankr@> wrote:

> > > Respected Mona_Khadilkar,

> > > Things will take shape after 22-7-2006 and within a

> > weeks.time.Please write to me afterwards for further analysis

of

> > course free of cost..

> > > Regards,

> > > jagannathan.

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > > On 7/20/06, mona_khadilkar <mona_khadilkar@>

> > wrote: Respected teachers on this forum -

> > > I am in great duress. Please help me. I am at that stage in

my

> life

> > > where most people want stability, security and life of

dignity.

> But

> > > fate has something else stored for me I guess.I desperately

need

> > your

> > > help and advice. What should I do ? All these years I have

not

> > taken

> > > any decision, life announced its decisions upon me and I

> accepted.

> > I

> > > put on a mask everyday of my life of what a happy and cosy

life I

> > lead.

> > > I do not like to wash my dirty linen(which is my husband's)

in

> > public.

> > > But I am not sure if I can continue this act anymore. My

husband

> > has

> > > filed for divorce. I am totally broken within. Is there any

hope

> > for

> > > me? What about my children ?

> > > Sincere thanks.

> > > Mona.

> > > ---------------------------

> > > Details:

> > > 11th Oct 1971, Bombay(India), 9:15 am.

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > > See the all-new, redesigned .com. Check it out.

> > >

> >

>

>

>

>

>

>

> -------------------------

----------

> See the all-new, redesigned .com. Check it out.

>

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Share on other sites
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Posted
Posted

Ashutoshji --

 

You wrote I did not accept my husband for who he was in time....

maybe I was so blindfolded and had put him so high up on a pedestal

that I still cannot believe he is such a indecent and immoral person.

I also cannot believe that why God made me the way I am with such

high principles and why he put such a womanizer of a husband in my

fate ? What did I do to deserve it ? I was a very homely girl.

 

Anyway, but now that I know how he is, should I still accept him and

continue in this marriage ? Is that what you mean by I did not

acccept him in time ? So even if I had found out his character early

on in marriage(in time) I should have still accepted him just because

we were married ? Now that I know "how he is", I know I cannot do

anything to change him, but is "accepting" him for who he is the only

way out for me ? Is that my only way to redemption ?

 

-- Mona

 

 

 

 

valist, "astrologerashutosh"

<astrologerashutosh wrote:

>

> Dear Mona,

>

> I will take the liberty of quoting you to explain

how the enemy within works: You wrote:

>

> "I hv been

> selfish in that I hv wanted my husband for myself, devoted to me

and

> striving for the betterment of out small family to give our fmily a

> stable and secure future. I loved him dearly and was

literally "under

> his spell" .. so mesmerized by his looks, his sleek ways and his

> charms.... until I found out with proof that he used all his good

> looks and charms to get other women."

>

>

> You always suspected that he was not truthfull, but you

refused to believe it untill you found out. You yourself had tied the

blindfold on your eyes.

>

> There is no use lamenting what he did. He did not change

after marriage, he was always like that, only you did not accept it

in time.

>

> He will never change, whatever you do. Leaving your own

prefered ideologies and lifestyles for him was another mistake. You

must have thought that you will be able to understand him better that

way and guide him according to what you desire in your married life.

>

> Rather than indulging in self pity, try to think rationally

and stop believing anyone at face value. In relationships, it is

better to be cautious than to be sorry. Believe in the

phrase, "guilty untill proven innocent."

>

> Love is not a panacea for all cures. But, It is a good

distractor from reality.

>

>

> One who is prepared for the worst gets the best of all

things.

>

> Regards,

>

> Ashutosh

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

> -

> mona_khadilkar

> valist

> Monday, 24 July, 2006 06:57

> Re: Is there divorce in my fate ? What will become

of me and my children ?

>

>

> Dear Ashutosh ji and all advisors..

>

> I am really grateful for all the responses. Some were +ve and

some -

> ve, so I am still confused. Most of you seem to think my

Vrishchik

> lagna and Jupiter in first house will save my marriage.

>

> Also Ashutoshji wrote that my usband is not entirely to be blamed

for

> his actions. I do agree that I have a temper and like things to

go my

> way (which generally are ways to benefit my family). I hv been

> selfish in that I hv wanted my husband for myself, devoted to me

and

> striving for the betterment of out small family to give our fmily

a

> stable and secure future. I loved him dearly and was

literally "under

> his spell" .. so mesmerized by his looks, his sleek ways and his

> charms.... until I found out with proof that he used all his good

> looks and charms to get other women.

>

> Please tell me, does any of my temper, tantrums (and my husband

too

> has a very nasty temper and is extremely vindictive), or actions

> deserve me to be cheated by my husband ? He had an affair with a

> married american woman which began when i ws pregnant with my

second

> daughter and continued right until the time that I found out

(with

> evidence) when she turned a year old. And when I look back at all

the

> 10 years of my marriage, I am almost certain my husband has been

with

> other women right since the time of our marriage.

>

> Am I to blame for all his actions ? And is he justified ? And

should

> I still accept him ? You wrote about my "enemy within"... yes I

have

> a very deep deep hurt. My sould has been murdered. I got betrayal

for

> my loyalty and love.

>

> Ashutoshji, kindly please tell me how should I kill my enemy

within

> which is my wounded soul/ego/womanhood and accept my husband ? I

> honestly want to accept him for sake of my children and our

family

> reputation. But please please show me a way how to erase those

wounds

> and memories ? I will gladly follow any advice which will assure

me

> my memories and hurt will be erased .... I do many religious

things

> these days...

>

> I was raised as a brahmin girl with all brahmin customs, no non-

veg,

> prayers, education, culture... I gave it all up after marriage to

> please my husband because he was very western and i always wanted

to

> impress him. I started eating and cooking non-veg, giving him

company

> in occassional drinks, wearing western outfits and heavy

makeup....

> and just when I was fat and out of shape with my pregnancy, he

> stabbed me in the back.... how should i forget that ?

>

> I have gone back to being a pure vegetarian. No drinks (even

> occassional for company). No heavy makeup. I go to temple

frequently

> and devote most of my time to kids apart from work and cooking.

>

> I have been "searching" for answers for the past 18 months to

nurse

> my wounded heart and soul. I dont think there is any medicine in

this

> world to heal my soul. I sometimes fear I will die with a broken

and

> hurting soul which will haunt me in my next life too.

>

> I really want to close the karmic account between me and my

husband

> in this life itself. Somehow I think if I do not close this

account,

> it will haunt me life after life. Because he has hurt me so badly

in

> this life, and I cannot do anything about it (because no revenge

is

> going to be enough for the amount of pain/deprivation/depression

he

> has caused me), I might have to carry it on in my next birth to

get

> even with him. And I honestly honestly dont want that.......

>

> I am one sorry soul stuck in a chakravyuh! Self pity is all I

have

> for myself and I hate it.

>

> - Mona

>

> valist, "astrologerashutosh"

> <astrologerashutosh@> wrote:

> >

> > Dear Mona,

> >

> > Your birth time needs rectification. You were

> born in Libra ascendent.

> >

> > I do not see a divorce, but only separation. Things will

> improve in your favor from november'06 onwards. Career growth too

at

> the same time.

> >

> > You will not go back and settle in India, but will end up

> in US only.

> >

> > A simple way is to accept your husband as he is. If he does

> not attend Indian functions, do not force him to do so.

> >

> > You are also at a lot of fault here. Your husband alone

> cannot be blamed. You have always wanted things to move your way,

> even though you do not show such desires openly.

> >

> >

> > The enemy always lies within. Catch it and conquer it. Once you

> have done that the world will change for you.

> >

> > Regards,

> >

> > Ashutosh

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> > -

> > Manoj Kumar

> > valist

> > Friday, 21 July, 2006 18:39

> > Re: Is there divorce in my fate ? What will

become

> of me and my children ?

> >

> >

> >

> > Dear Mona ji,

> >

> > I am sorry, I have little hope for you. Some elders in the

family

> may get involved for helping the situation. I see movement in

your

> case in October, 2006. I would request you to offer sincere

prayers

> to Lord Shiva.

> >

> > Best wishes,

> >

> > Manoj

> >

> > mona_khadilkar <mona_khadilkar@> wrote:

> > Also, I wanted to add that my parents (esp. mother) are not

> happy

> > about the divorce situation and think I should do whatever it

> takes

> > to save the marriage for kids sake. To save everyone from shame

> and

> > disgrace. I have a very hard time understanding their notion,

> because

> > I have already suffered enough all these years when my husband

> has

> > treated me like garbage, mostly comparing me with other

> american

> > women. How can I forget all that ? And all his betrayal when I

> was so

> > honest and loyal and hardworking ? I am living like a roommate

> in my

> > own house, and not getting in his way at all. He leads seperate

> life

> > and I lead seperate life. I do not question him anything. I do

> > sincerely my job and come home to my kids. He is also attached

> to

> > kids but often has made it very clear to me that he does not

> need me

> > in his life. Should I still beg and plead with him to not

> divorce and

> > continue this act for kids sake ?

> >

> > I wanted him to prove to me that he really needs me. And he

> wants to

> > not discuss anything. Just continue our parallel lives. He

> wants kids

> > to be brought up American way just like he himself has become.

> He

> > does not attend any Indian social function with me. I like

> jhansi ki

> > raani take my kids everywhere and go alone. People have also

> started

> > asking me why I go alone everywhere and why my husband doesn't

> come.

> >

> > Despite all this my parents still think, I should give in and

> beg him

> > to stay together for children sake because otherwise I will

> have no

> > one in this world after they are gone and life will be very

> difficult

> > for single mother. Even if someone marries me again, that will

> be

> > worse becasue the new person will never want my children. So

> its

> > better to compromise and live with my husband only.

> >

> > I am very distressed and afraid of husband, mother, world, my

> age, my

> > small children and everything. I just do not know how long I

> will

> > continue to live a life of fear and still raise my kids.

> > Is my life over ? Do I hv no right to dream of happy life ?

> >

> > valist, "mona_khadilkar"

> <mona_khadilkar@>

> > wrote:

> > >

> > > Dear Manojji and Jagannathji -

> > > Thank you for your prompt replies.

> > > I want to go back to India to raise my kids with my parents

> support.

> > > I do not know how much more life I have to live, but I only

> pray

> > that

> > > God be merciful enough to letme lead a life of self respect

> and

> > > dignity. And be able to bring up my children with good values.

> > > WIll moving back to India be a good decision for me ? I dont

> know

> > if

> > > I can continue in US after divorce after all the emotional

> turmoil

> > > that I have gone through in my marriage. But at same time I

> am also

> > > worried if life will be worse for me in India after divorce ?

> Also

> > > will I be financially secure ? Do I need to work all

> throughout my

> > > life or can I take a break in job during my transition to

> India?

> > >

> > > Jagannathji, I will write to you in one week's time again.

> > > Manoj ji, here are answers to your questions.

> > > Thank you once again for all your advise and guidance.

> > > Mona

> > > valist, Manoj Kumar <mouji99@> wrote:

> > > >

> > > > Dear Mona,

> > > >

> > > > A slight change in time can alter your horoscope.

> > > >

> > > > Kindly answer following questions to verify the horoscope.

> > > >

> > > > i. Are you the eldest or youngest amongst sisters in your

> > family.

> > > -- Yes. Only child of my parents.

> > > > ii. The total number of brothers and sisters are two or

> five.

> > > -- 0. My mother had to undergo an abortion due to in-laws

> trouble.

> > > She was pregnant for second time when I was 3 months old.

> > > > iii. Was the married life of your parents also disturbed.

> > > -- Extremely distrubed. In-Laws issues and my mothers short

> temper.

> > > > iv. Was there any problem to your mother at the time of

> your

> > > birth or were you a Caeserian birth

> > > -- No. Labour was for 6 - 8 hrs. Normal delivery.

> > > > v. did you marry after 1991.

> > > -- Yes

> > > > vi. do you have two children

> > > -- Yes. First boy and then girl

> > > > vii. Was your education in areas of finance like commerce

> etc.

> > or

> > > general humanities.

> > > -- No. Engineering degree(electronics) and in software

> industry all

> > > throughout.

> > > > viii. Most likely period of marriage seems to be between

> 1994-

> > > 1997.

> > > -- Yes. June 1996.

> > > > ix. Is your husband self-employed or the work that he has

> has

> > > overseas connections.

> > > -- Both husband and I are employed in US. He has lost a few

> jobs

> > > before. He is in IT sales/recruiting.

> > > > x. Finally, do you have problems with your teeth.

> > > -- Yes. Lots of problems. I have many partial dentures, my

> teeth

> > are

> > > extra sensitive to pain and I have had quite a few painful

> > > extrations/teeth work.

> > > >

> > > > regards,

> > > >

> > > > Manoj

> > > >

> > > > Jagannathan Kapisthalam <jagannathankr@> wrote:

> > > > Respected Mona_Khadilkar,

> > > > Things will take shape after 22-7-2006 and within a

> > > weeks.time.Please write to me afterwards for further analysis

> of

> > > course free of cost..

> > > > Regards,

> > > > jagannathan.

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > > On 7/20/06, mona_khadilkar <mona_khadilkar@>

> > > wrote: Respected teachers on this forum -

> > > > I am in great duress. Please help me. I am at that stage in

> my

> > life

> > > > where most people want stability, security and life of

> dignity.

> > But

> > > > fate has something else stored for me I guess.I desperately

> need

> > > your

> > > > help and advice. What should I do ? All these years I have

> not

> > > taken

> > > > any decision, life announced its decisions upon me and I

> > accepted.

> > > I

> > > > put on a mask everyday of my life of what a happy and cosy

> life I

> > > lead.

> > > > I do not like to wash my dirty linen(which is my husband's)

> in

> > > public.

> > > > But I am not sure if I can continue this act anymore. My

> husband

> > > has

> > > > filed for divorce. I am totally broken within. Is there any

> hope

> > > for

> > > > me? What about my children ?

> > > > Sincere thanks.

> > > > Mona.

> > > > ---------------------------

> > > > Details:

> > > > 11th Oct 1971, Bombay(India), 9:15 am.

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > > See the all-new, redesigned .com. Check it out.

> > > >

> > >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> > -------------------------

> ----------

> > See the all-new, redesigned .com. Check it out.

> >

>

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