Amma in Dallas

[Guest guest]

I just returned from Dallas yesterday and am depressed already since

I want to be with Mother.

 

I could not believe that the question line was so empty in Dallas! I

can't believe I was able to ask some questions and get such clear

answers. At the last minute before going up to Her with my

questions, I thought, I want to know about my back. I was in an

accident and no matter what I have tried, I cannot get any relief

that is lasting. (I have done physical therapy, massage,

acupuncture, microfascia release, energy work..!) So I quickly wrote

Back? on my card. Very soon after that, it was my turn.

 

Amma looked at me and smiled over Her arm at me while hugging

someone. She was taking quite a while to get to my question and I

was overjoyed, since of course, this meant I could sit next to Her

longer!

 

Then, She took some vibhute (spell?) and put it in my hand and spoke

to Big Swami. He told me that She said it was for my back. I later

realized that Big Swami had not yet read my question to Her! She

actually told me to look for another job and that I have Her grace.

Now I am befuddled on what to look for! I have absolutely no idea. I

guess that will come together.

 

Interestingly enough, I thought I loved my job. I went to work today

and now cannot wait to quit! Where did that come from?? Today I felt

like I just hated my job! LOL...it is so bizarre! She told me to

keep doing what I am (as I have 2 jobs and am self employed for one)

but to definitely find a different job.

 

She blessed my new Amma doll. I have not ever had one and have been

wanting one for some time. Now that I have it, I am so happy. She

told Her attendants to give me a rose from Her chair. Then She

reached around to get an apple for me as well. They seemed puzzled

that Amma was doing this and asked when my birthday was. I told them

(Sept 11). They all had a vaguely surprised expression and one of

them said then I needed this. I later heard that She does this for

birthdays but my birthday is no time soon.

 

I lost the rose while in my "after visiting Amma, trancelike

(duncelike) state of mindlessness". I could not believe I did that!

I think I left it on the counter at the outside stand at the

airport. I like to think that someone took it home and now is drawn

to Amma somehow. Maybe that was the whole thing about the rose. Who

knows? Or maybe someone who has to leave a loved one had it to cheer

them up. I can only believe it brought some good somewhere. AFter

all, it was Amma's rose!

 

I see her again this weekend. I hope to go to San Ramon this fall.

Maybe I need to live in the ashram eventually. I have heard it is

hard but it seems more and more, I just wish I lived with Amma.

 

missing Amma,

adriane