To Supriti about Witnessing and Thriving (was Devotee Conflict)

[Guest guest]

Supriti wrote:

 

....Don't  get me wrong I am not espousing being a door mat.  I am only saying

that  as a human on the plane, I have responsibility for myself and my

spiritual  growth, no one elses.  Many of my problems were because of trying to 

control every little thing around me to avoid pain and abuse.  It was  survival

mode.  And until Amma showed me what thriving and flourishing as  a human

spirit were all about, I continued to survive and my ego took care of  everything. 

I fought a lot.  I growled, I screamed, I drank till  drunk, used drugs, the

whole shebang. 

 

Looking back on that life I lived, I am grateful to Amma and Amma's children

-  all my brothers and sisters,  that I survived long enough to  thrive.  I

still have ego days, and I always pray to Amma that she help  me to see the

truth and grow from the conflicts she puts before  me.

 

 

 

Dear Supriti ~ your post touched me deeply, as well as the one before where 

you wrote to Temba about witnessing. That was a whole new perspective. I have 

read where Amma talks about us being the Witness ... or being in the state of

the Witness, where there is no ego and we are able to impartially see what

is  going on. To think of people being Witnesses for each other is an

incredible  idea. I grew up in an abusive home, so I very much relate to everything you

have  written. My sister was the one who got into alcohol. I became a

workaholic, and  I think that is part of the reason I am sick now. But the point

about not just  surviving, but thriving, is a very important one. Thriving means

we're still  growing, learning and open, regardless some of our struggles.

Being held close  to Amma and called "daughter" meant all the world to me. Jai Ma

~  Linda