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dear Das ,

 

> "Some one has told the native that she may have loss of life in near future.If

 

> some preventive action is taken then she will live long."

 

This was in my Question regarding a girl.She is ill and facing problems thats

why her parents consults every astrologer.

 

There are people who try to fool and tell lies to earn money or just a

sansation.

 

But believe me the situation is not so pathetic.

 

People do not believe blindly.

 

They apply their own reasoning and wisdom earned through experience.

 

you need to worry but not to be dismayed for it.........Believe me.

 

You know why i fell in love with astrology ......its because it gives the very

kind and so obvious explanations to my spiritual quests........

 

I am very novice to astrology but craving from so long for my thirst of

spiritual peace.

 

Astrology always attracted me but i was very much confused.....

 

6 years back i started learning palmistry.....

 

now one year back i was moved towards astrology........

 

Always HE provided me with the right things for my questions.......

 

While wandering here and there(in books or other stuff) for learning astrology i

was put to you for my answers.......

 

Oh...i found the right explanations ....the real connection to spiritualism in

your Lessons....

 

And you are thinking of selling out the business??????????????

 

Shiza:::You gave your life for astrology and Hinduism......thats why you were

able to give me answers..........the things you gave your life to gave me

answers which i could have found after same long

search/wandering.........................I am indebted to you oh,dear.

 

Pain:::Oh the Gods way of giving us real lesson.......i have seen people with

answers to all the problems.

 

If I cry in front of them they will give me a lot of answers........that there

all in Vedas and others.

 

I was happy thinking that i know .....i know.....i know.....

 

then PAIN came. the same like when your most loved

one dies . more than that it yelled on me.......oh you culprit.....you did

nothing...

 

i was down...dismayed.....distressed....obscured...and all.

 

pain gave me more strenghth and reason and will to dig deep and deep.....

 

And i came up after all the struggle with answers that are written nowhere

.........but are same as all.

 

Also...you are so honest in your emotions.........why should i not love you.

 

i wish you were a child and i could take you up in my

arms.............................

 

I am worried for you......

 

I do not know what to do...what are the answers..........when will your pain

end.......

 

Give me answers.....................give me answers.....

 

But do not take downers.........

 

when you hit a Celt real hard, he bounces back stronger

 

:::::::::Oh i am in bliss on hearing this...............

 

ha ha ha....

 

Love

 

Amit

 

Das Goravani <> wrote:

 

 

So much pain, so much, unstopping, never ending, tried piercing, easier than

I thought, now I havea bloody needle on Morrigans altar, will I ever have

the love I seek, will the lonliness ever end, I can't stand this pain,

unednding, unending, nobody says a word, none of you respond hardly, just

one, what to do, where to go, will a woman ever be my wife, of is death the

way, year after year after year uneding, meds help, but not enough, it's

STRONG pain, unending, many pills don't stop it, the longing to be loved, by

a beatufiul woman in person, a wife, never mine to be it seems, only pain of

longing,

 

Somesay its borderline personality disorder, but nobody cares to read and

heal me, I don't know what to do, the piercing felt good, the blood, the

ability to contorol my bodily life, to feel in control, that was new, the

bloody pin looks beautifukl, freedom

 

Don¹t call the cops, the ir padded cells cost $1000 per day here, really,

they do, call Sacred Heart and ask...you get sick and they profit, that's

all, nothing more, hell this is

 

I have no other but you, the only other, Bernadette, doestn't love, just

talks, no touching, married, lives away, long over, long over, I feel like

dieing,

 

Whatever, you don't want to hear it, I'm with the street people in India,

just in pain, liying in the gutter, in pain, abandoned, but in America, not

much different

 

All my work, has brought many words of love, but very little to none of

other, no wife I love, selfish you say, perhaps, but when you are obsessed,

borderline they say, it doesn't matter what you call me, I still HURT very

badly

 

I try to drown it, so many pills, much more than supposed to, many many, it

still doesn't stop

 

How long, til I just say forget it, and cut off the hands or something,

under so many pills, in the shower, or lay on the tracks, or something.

 

How long, how much pain, a life of pain? I think not.

 

It's already so many years.

 

You think I do this easily, write this to the world?

 

No, it's only because it's so great I don't care anymore

 

 

Don¹t care, don¹t care, losing everything anyway, due to pain

 

Cant watch tv, so many pretty girls, why wont one be mine

 

Selfish you say, perhaps, but pain deosn't stop in me because of your

judgemental workds upon me

 

The pain doesn't stop because you say some words about my character that you

perceive, it' keeping on going

 

And I have to bear it, it's hard, hard hard pain, like when your most loved

one dies, but picture it never stopping, NEVER

 

 

 

shit

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mail - You care about security. So do we.

 

 

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  • 3 months later...

Dear Das;

I have been reading your e-mails for years and know I can't do anything to

make your pain go away. If I volunteered to marry you you would probably reject

me because I am not young enough or smart enough or pretty enough or have the

right body. It doesn't matter.

For what it's worth the suffering you are experiencing is know by this

consciousness and as you know many others. I think that that knowing has value;

that

is the people out there in the world, like me, reading your cries keeps you

afloat. I would do the same if I were in your perdicament, reach out to who

ever would listen to keep at bay the harsh reality that as a separate self we

will always end up feeling lonely and miserable.

I hope you find the love and connection you crave. You must be very strong to

endure so much agony.

Sue Ann

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