joke for you

[Guest guest]

Mr D joins the HK's – "what's a guy gotta do??"

 

This is the story of how Rodney Dangerfield read some of Srila

Prabhupada's books, and then he decided to become a Hare Krishna, and

moved into the temple. He asked the TP what he should do for Krishna

and the TP said, "Just use your talents in Krishna's service."

 

So, one night at the Sunday feast, he did his routine, standing at

the microphone in dhoti, sikha and tilaka.

 

"What's a guy gotta do to get a little respect around here?" Rodney

tugs his neckbeads with two fingers and stretched his neck out and

jerked his jaw around with a plaintive expression on his face, "Ya

know, I just can't get no respect!"

 

"Ya know, the other day they asked me to give the Srimad Bhagavatam

class, and they announced it at Tulasi puja, and nobody came. Well, I

said to myself, `Ok, I'll just preach to the four walls.' And so I

was just preaching away and then I heard a low rasping sound. `What

is that?' I asked myself, and I stopped to listen. It was snoring!!

Even the four walls fell asleep!! Later I found out there was a

devotee sleeping and snoring in the hall." [he tugs his neckbeads and

jerks his head around, "What's a guy gotta do to get a little respect

around here?"]

 

"Can't get no respect," Rod says as he tugs at his neckbeads, "Ya

know, the other day I had to disguise myself as an old man, put grey

in my hair, hunch my back and hobble around with a cane, just so some

devotees would open the door for me and show me a little respect."

[he tugs at beads and says, "no respect."]

 

"Can you believe it? The temple has this pet parrot, and this parrot

only says two words, Hare and Krishna. He's never said anything else.

Well, [tugs at neckbeads] I walked into the room the other day, it

was just me and the parrot, and he pointed his wingtip at me in

derision, and chanted, "Godas, Godas, Godas" over and over again, and

laughing hysterically so much he fell off his perch." [tugs at

beads, "can't get no respect."]

 

"Ya know it? Every time I walk in the room, some devotee rushes to

light some incense. Yeah, ok, I know that devotees in old bodies

sometimes have a little smell, old people do that, but this is

ridiculous. Do they have to make it so obvious? Every time I raise my

arms in kirtan, some Brahmacari makes a face at me like there's a

smell in the air." [tugs at his neckbeads and say, "when's a guy

gonna get a little respect around here?"]

 

"The other day I was trying to give the Bhagavad-gita class, and some

Brahmacaris were taking subji in the hall, and one pokes his head

around the corner and say, "Hey prabhu, can you hold it down in there

a little? We're trying to take subji here, can ya give us a little

peace?" [tugs on beads, and says, "I just can't get no respect."]

 

"Ya know, I've been a Bhakta for six months now, and there's new

Bhaktas coming all the time, some here only a few weeks, and already,

all of them are cleaning the temple and cutting veggies in the

kitchen, and I'm still cleaning the stool room! So I goes up to the

temple commander and says, `what's a guy gotta do to get a little

seniority around here?' and he goes, `you're as senior as they come,

Rod, and besides, you got so much talent, the stool room's never been

so clean, and it's hard to replace an act like that." Rod tugs at his

neckbeads and grimaces, and says, "how much talent does it take to

scrub a toilet? I can't get no respect."

 

"The other day I was giving the Sunday feast lecture, and I tell ya,

devotees are so rude sometimes! Devotees were walking in and out all

the time, making so much noise, I could hardly hear myself talk. Some

Mataji motioned me to quiet it down a little, her baby was soundly

asleep and I was waking her up! There were hysterical peals of

laughter out in the hall all the time. After 20 minutes everyone was

sleeping or staring out into space. Some devotees were yawning and

looking down at their watch, making sure I saw them do it, and then

giving me the evil eye. When I said, `we're not these bodies,' some

devotees looked at me as if they were insulted. Finally I said, `Jai,

ok, it's time to take the feast!!' Immediately all the devotees from

the hall came pouring into the temple room with a roar, dancing like

madmen and chanting, `Jai, Haribol, Finally, glory, glory, he's done,

he's done!!." [he tugs at his neckbeads and says, "I tell ya, a guy

can't get no respect around here!"]

 

Then Rod told a joke and nobody laughed, and he said, "what's a guy

gotta do to get a little canned laugher around here?"