Hurting Human Helps Heroin Helpless

[Guest guest]

Krishna's sense of humor:

 

I'm feeling all depressed, and so two friends call and say they'll come

over and comfort me.

 

So they arrive, hugs hugs. Yay.

 

But then I notice funny things, begin asking questions, pretty soon find

out, they've both hooked on heroin, out of money, really messed up,

sick, etc etc.

 

So I launch into my Jupiter/Aries mode (save everything, give everyone

advice), and for the next 24 hours which just ended I'm exaustingly

running around trying to put their lives back together, talking to

bosses, cleaning up crap, throwing out stuff, dealing with blood,

tracks, drugs, you name it. Whew.

 

Sure helps you to forget your own problems when you see self induced,

lack of love-abandonment, slow suicides, at their fuller force of effect

and raw ugly beauty.

 

As for hardship helping the creative be so: Again, see the book "Touched

by Fire" by Kay Jamison (very depressing book) for a very scientific

approach to the theory that Bi Polar Depression is at the root of most

of the great art and creativity of history.

 

In other words, she has the proveable theory that great artists,

musicians, authors, etc., tend to all be touched by special mental

frameworks which allow great insight and creativity, and resultant

tremendous isolations and lonliness due to thoughts, visions, realities,

unreciprocated by those around them, or the world. The Van Gough

syndrome you could call it.

 

But I'm a nothing.

 

Yesterday from one of my funny little junkie friends, I heard:

 

"Wow, it's like, so cool that there's this famous person cleaning my house"

 

"uhhh, infamous"

 

Yes, most of my writings that others love were written in total pain.

Have no doubt about that. Most of everything around my business, the

software, writings, web, everything, pretty much, created during the

last 8 years which have been very hard for me personally on an emotional

level due to the standard issues of life(love, family, God, friends,

money, etc). I just didn't understand life correctly. Way too religious

and optimistic. Whoa. I thought things that just weren't true about

people, society, what people think and feel, and so on. The adjustment

has been greatly disillusioning.

 

I had a kind of breakdown when SadaSati started in 93 which rendered me

more in love in Brahman and less in love with Accounting. So my life

began to change. Tears were regular, and divorce, depression, and so

many things followed. I found myself alone without wife and kids at one

point in Novato California, but paying all their bills from afar as well

as my own, living in one little basement room under some rich families

house, having a huge overhead due to paying for a family I wasn't living

with, hearing nasty rumors about me from old friends far away, started

crying, felt alone, called out to God, wrote all that stuff, and have

been getting lovely letters like the recent one reposted by Debra from

Lucia.

 

God works through the down only because they've become more real. The

"up" are in illusion generally and cannot speak to the truths of life,

only the relative. The truths of life are larger than the relative, and

they do not think of them, because in the absolute their relative lives

are washed away by a supposedly benevolent higher power, and they like

their lives, so this initial conflict of interest ends their ability to

see God clearly immediately. This is called maya, or illusion, and only

after leaving the comfort of our present material illusions can we

clearly see the bigger picture, beyond the marshmellows, blue sky, and

bon bons.

 

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You must solve why you suffer and die in order to know and love God.

=========================

 

That is not possible for the materialistically overwhelmed and body

loving kind of folk. That's why wise men following bright stars have

come. To introduce us to Saturn in a good way. Show us how to walk like

Saints and live/die right.

 

Morning ablutions complete.

 

4 AM, lots to do, the insanity of talking to God in total sobriety in

the icy north.

 

Hope my junkies are sleeping and not fixing. It's like taking care of

babies, constant diapers and milk.

 

Anyone who likes me alot, in San Francisco, find "Linda Najarian" and

thank her, tell that Das Goravani is loved, and that she did a good

thing. (She onced saved me big time). She owns a bread business in SF.

Don't know if you can still find her.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

--

 

 

Das Goravani

 

 

 

 

 

 

2852 Willamette St # 353

Eugene OR USA 97405

 

or

Fax: 541-343-0344

 

"Goravani Jyotish"

Vedic/Hindu Astrology Software