His Story - 13

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anxiously searching for it. Some boys who were following Me enquired, “Raju!

What are you searching for?” I told them wearing a collar pin, yesterday. That

was lost. I am searching for it.” They too started searching for the collar pin

all over the place. I laughed and remarked “you are going to the school to

study. Why are you bothered about the collar pin?” They said “It looked so

beautiful when you are wearing it.” One of those boys ran to Seshama Raju’s

house to inform him about the loss of the collar pin. At that time, Seshama

Raju and Rama Raju were discussing among themselves “The actions of Sathyam

appear to be very strange. How do we understand his behaviour?” When the boy

reported about the loss of the collar pin and My searching for it, they at once

rushed to Me. Rama Raju lovingly put his hand around My shoulder and enquired

“My dear! what are you searching for?” I replied very innocently “I am

searching for something”. He understood that there was some inner

significance in My reply and further questioned Me “Raju! How is it possible in

this world to search for something you do not know?” I then replied, “the

collar pin you gave Me dropped somewhere and is not to be found”. He said “O.k!

does not matter. I will give you ten such collar pins. Come! Let us go home.”

Then, I sang the following song, saying “The worldly link had gone, the moment

the collar pin is lost.” “It was October twentieth, Sunday, Baba, returned

from Hampi and was going to school. The collar pin dropped and could not be

found. That was the day of the change; The worldly attachment left him in the

form of a collar pin. The pilgrimage to Hampi too served its purpose. Baba left

home saying that

Maya Could not bind him anylonger.” (Telugu Song) For Me, the worldly

attachment was like a pin. And, that has left Me. The Bond got separated.

Hence, I left home on the very day. The worldly objects delude us. The day when

we come out this delusion, on the very same day Maya (illusion) leaves us. In

the meanwhile, several people gathered at that place, among whom was an English

Teacher by name H. S. Venkata Ramana. I was taken to his house. There they

enquired, “Are you searching for God or for the pin” I replied, “I need not

search for God, since he is omnipresent. Neither I need to search for the pin,

for, everything is in My hand,” Then, Rama Raju questioned Me “Where is God?

Can we see him?” earlier, I gave him a ring. It disappeared from his finger and

came into My hand. He was stunned. He asked Me “How did it happen?” I replied “I

can do anything. Everything is in My hand.” Watching all this, Seshama Raju was

astonished and confused. He gave up the feeling that he was the elder brother

of this body. Shedding tears of joy, he asked My dear! you are all-knowing.

Everything is in your hand. Then, what are you searching for?” I also did not

address him as

‘brother’! I told him I was not longer bound by worldly relationship. I held the

hand of Rama Raju and asked “What is this?” He replied, “It is My hand.” Then, I

took out the fountain pen from his pocket and asked him “whose pen is this?” He

said “It is Mine.” “You say that it is my hand, my pen, my body, my mind, my

senses etc. The word ‘my’ indicates that you are different from all this. Then

who are you?” I asked him. Then, everyone started thinking. “Yes, What Raju

says is correct. We say this is mine and that is mine, but we do not know who

we are”. Everyone was silent. They agreed that they did not know their true

identity. I told them that I had come down only to make people realize their

true identity. It is the eye that sees and the mind that thinks; (showing

the handkerchief), they eye can see this kerchief. But, to identify it as a

kerchief, there must be a basis. Is it not? You say this is a kerchief. How did

you come to know about it? you say, mind is the basis of all this. What is mind?

To whom does it belong? You do not know. You think you know that which is not

known to you, in reality. That unknown thing is, infact, your true self. Make

efforts to realize it. From that day onwards, many seekers of truth started

visiting Me. They used to discuss among themselves; “what Raju says is true.

But, how do we realize our true self?” People quote from scriptures and talk

high philosophy, but do not know their real meaning. They say “This is my ring;

my body; my handkerchief etc. But, they do not realize who that “I” and “My”

are. One has to make efforts to realize that truth”. I started explaining the

concept further: “There are two important aspect one has to consider – one is

drisyam (that

which is seen) and the other is drashta (seer). It is said “yad drisyam

thannasyam” (all that is seen is bound to perish). So whatever you see is only

an illusion. You are the drashta, that is your true identity. The English

Teacher H. S. Ramana was a noble soul. His house was on the way to My School.

He used to sit in the front veranda of his house and anxiously wait for Me. As

soon as he saw Me, he used to call ‘Raju’, take Me into his house and offer

coffee or snacks to Me. But, I was not interested in these worldly objects.

Earlier, I used to address him as “Sir!” But, from that day onwards I started

addressing him as “Ramana”. I told him

“You are not My Teacher. Neither I am your student. The teacher-student

relationship is worldly. All that the eyes can see and the ears can hear are

only worldly. These are perishable. One has to go beyond and search for the

transcendental reality.” From then onwards, wherever I went and whomever I met,

I used to teach these higher principles. Then, one day Ramana called Seshama

Raju and told him, “Seshama Raju! Do not trouble yourself much in trying to

understand the behaviour of Sathyam. This boy is delving deeper and deeper into

the mysteries of life. It is not possible for anyone to fathom his true nature.

Let us wait for sometime and see.” So saying, he took Me into his house and

offered snacks, coffee, meals etc., with great love. Poor man! He did not

realize that

I was never interested in such things. I did not touch any of them. In My view,

they are all worldly things which undergo constant change. They are not

permanent. “You are treating unreal objects as real and striving to achieve

them. This is the biggest mistake you are committing.” Thus, I taught them

higher philosophical concepts. H. S. Ramana used to address Me as “Raju!” till

then. From that day onwards, he started addressing Me as “Guruji”. Holding My

feet, he pleaded with Me “Guruji!” Please come to My house.” Those who were

witnessing the scene were amazed that this elderly gentleman who was a teacher

himself was holding the feet of this young boy, his student. Then, Ramana

declared in front of all these people. “Not only Me, a day will come when the

entire world will fall at his feet.” I told the people gathered there that it

was time for Me to leave the house and the school, to embark on My mission to

alleviate the suffering of My devotees. I then threw away the books in My hand

on the ground and declared thus: “Know that I am Sai in reality; Cast off

your worldly relationships; Give up your efforts to restrain Me; The worldly

attachements can no longer bing Me; None, however great he may be, can hold

Me.” (Telugu poem) Seshama Raju also used to write poetry. He was not in

the house when this incident had happened. He came to know about it later

through his

wife and commented “Somebody made this boy recite this poem; otherwise, how can

he compose such a beautiful poem?” There used to be an Astrologer by name

Rama Narayana Sastri, in the neighbouring house. Seshama Raju related all My

talk on philosophical truths, to him. He shed tears of joy, on hearing My

words. The tears actually fell on My feet. From that day onwards, everybody in

Uravakonda started addressing Me as “Sathya Sai Baba.” This name, however, was

not a new name. Infact, it was an old one. The name given to this body was

“Sathya”. The visions shown by Me to the people were that of Sai Baba. Hence,

they combined these two names and started calling Me “Sathya Sai Baba.” I then

revealed to the people gathered around Me “I have come to spread the Truth.”

They were

dumb founded on hearing My revelation. I emphasized the point once again saying,

“This is not a name which I gave to Myself. Infact, it is you who gave this

name to Me! I have no name at all!” So saying I got up and started walking

away. In the meanwhile, all those assembled there including Ramana and Sastri

tried to prevent Me from going. I then advised them “do not try to stop Me.

What I expect from you is not outward change. I expect that you undergo mental

transformation. I have come to make you realize your innate truthful nature. I

am not this body. Hence, none can restrain Me. Try to follow what I say. Then

you will understand your own true nature.” There used to be a big rock in the

compound of Anjaneyulu’s house.

Anjaneyulu was working as an Excise Inspector in Uravakonda. He was a great

devotee. I went and sat on that rock. Anjaneyulu used to experience some

inexplicable joy and spiritual Aura, in the presence of Swami. His house was in

the same street as the school in which I was studying then. He and his wife used

to wait at the entrance to their house with some coffee and snacks, waiting

anxiously for My arrival on the way to school. If by any chance their children

were there at that time, they used to send them inside the house, lest the

couple may have to face some embarrassment before their children. As soon as I

arrived at their door, they used to prostrate before Me, holding My feet. I

used to argue a lot with them saying “sir! you are older in age. You should not

do such things.” But, they used to reply “Raju! It is true that we are older in

age, so far as the body is concerned. But, we are very insignificant in

knowledge and wisdom. You are the Lord Krishna, verily” They were

afraid that others may make fun of them if they extol Me like this, in public.

Hence, they used to express themselves in private. I went and sat on the

boulder in the garden in the compound of Anjaneyulu’s house. He felt very happy

saying, “Aha! Raju has come!” He went into his house and told his wife to

prepare a variety of dishes. But, I did not touch any of them. I exhorted the

people gathered there to sing the bhajan “Manasa Bhajare Guru charanam Dusthara

Bhavasagara Tharanam” (Oh! Mind! May you serve the lotus feet of Guru, which

will take you across the formidable ocean of Samsara.)

0pt"> All those who gathered there were very much surprised, “How come! what a

miraculous change had taken place in this young boy!” Seshama Raju then

approached Me and requested Me “Sathya! come let us go home.” I replied “I will

not come.” It was not My nature to disobey the commands of elders. Seshama Raju

was therefore surprised that I was for the first time giving a reply to him. He

wondered “How did this Sathyam pickup such courage!” While I was looking at him

gently smiling with a calm and serene face, he saw great effulgence round My

face. While returning from the school, Seshama Raju tried his best to take Me

home. But, I told him frankly that I would not come. Anjaneyulu then tried to

convince Seshama Raju saying “My dear Sir! you don’t trouble him. Let him stay

here itself. After sometime when he becomes normal, I will

myself bring him home.” In the meanwhile, different types of people gathered

there and started questioning Me “Who are you? Are you a devil or a ghost?” I

firmly replied in unequivocal terms “I am neither a devil nor a ghost. Know

that I am Sai, in reality.” They then enquired “How are we to believe that you

are Sai Baba?” In those days nobody had ever heard the name ‘Sai Baba’ in that

area. In fact, the name of Sai Baba was not known to anybody in the entire

district of Ananthapur. Then someone brought some flowers there. I took those

flowers into My hand and threw them on the floor. The flowers arranged

themselves as “Sai Baba” in Telugu letters. While I was sitting on that boulder

in Anjaneyulu’s house, one photographer came there and took a photograph of Me.

When it

was developed and printed, a small stone in front of Me appeared as Shirdi Sai

Baba in the photo. Copies of that photo were distributed to all the people

gathered on that occasion. The boulder on which I sat on that day is still

there in Uravakonda. The President of the Andhra Pradesh State, Sathya Sai Seva

Organisations, Anjanayya built a beautiful Mandir and a hall in that place.

Nobody knew about Sai Baba in those days. When I returned to Puttparthi from

Uravakonda after My annunciation, the villagers heard the name ‘Sai Baba’, for

the first time. They then thought that I had taken upon a Muslim name. But, Sai

Baba transcends religion and caste. “Wherever you see, there you will find Him.”

The Vaishnavaites say Vishnu is great; The Saivaites say Siva is great; The

Ganapathyas say Ganapathi is great; The Educated say Sarada is great; The

Muslims say Allah is

great; The Saaktheyas say Sakthi is great; My devotees say Sathya Sai is great;

Yet some others say all forms are one; However, you must proclaim the truth

that all religions are one; And Brahman is one and only one. What more can I

explain? Oh! Men of noble qualities assembled here! (Telugu Poem) Divinity as

no particular name or form. Whatever form you contemplate upon, it assumes that

form. Did Lord Rama or Lord Krishna incarnate with any particular name? It is

only after they

incarnated, people gave them names. It is said Karshatheethi Krishnah, which

means that the one who attracts all people is Krishna. Krishna was really the

Embodiment of Bliss. Who can give a name to the Atma Thathwa, which is the

embodiment of eternal bliss, wisdom absolute, beyond the pair of opposites,

expansive and pervasive like the sky, the goal indicated by the Mahavakya

Thatwamasi, one without a second, eternal, pure, unchanging and witness to all

functions of the intellect. “The Atma Thatwa is immanent in every individual,

nay every living being. In fact, I have come into this world only to make people

realize this truth”. I explained this to the people gathered around Me. Seshama

Raju then questioned Me “Who are you?” I replied “You are calling Me ‘Sathya’.

Hence I am Sathya. If you call Me, ‘brother’, I am ‘brother’. Whoever calls Me

by whatever name, I assume that form. To tell you the truth, I have no worldly

relationship with anyone. I answer, by whichever name you call Me. All these

names are ascribed to Me; they are not the names with which I have taken birth

in this world. I have come into this world only to make you realize this

truth.” Seshama Raju was utterly confused and dumb-founded at My reply. He

did not know what to do in the circumstances. He thought he should send a

telegram to the parents asking them to come immediately. But, it took a long

time in those days for a telegram to reach Puttparthi from Uravakonda. Hence,

He sent a message through one of his students asking Peda Venkama Raju and

Easwaramma to come to Uravakonda immediately. They both came, post-haste.

Seshama Raju brought them to the place where I was sitting. Easwaramma cried

inconsolably and pleaded with Me “Son! come! let us go to your brother’s

house.” I replied, “I will not come anywhere. If you so desire, I will

accompany you to Puttaparthi. I will provide joy to all the villagers of

Puttaparthi and thereafter go to any place of My

liking. In the meanwhile, there was a lot of commotion and enquiry “Where is

Raju? Where is Raju?” since I did not attend school that day. None of the boys

attended the prayer meeting. All of them rushed to Anjaneyulu’s house. But, I

did not look at anybody. I just sat on the boulder looking somewhere. Observing

Me, the children started thinking in different ways like “There is a lot of

change in Raju. He appears to be mentally deranged. Perhaps, something might

have happened in the house after he returned from Hampi.” I then advised the

children that one of

the boys may sing the prayer song in My absence and the school started

thereafter. Twentieth October was the day on which the entire town of

Uravakonda underwent a total change. In tune with this, great change had also

taken place in the student community. Their love and affection towards Me

increased beyond description. A small incident to illustrate the point. I used

to sing the prayer song everyday morning in the school assembly. Our Head

Master used to appreciate Me very much saying “Raju! Though you are very young,

the prayer song you sing stirs our souls.” I used to sing the following prayer

song daily in the school assembly: “Moment to moment, thy clarion call

resounds- Hearing thy magnanimous words, The Hindus, Buddhists, Jains, Parsis,

Muslims and Christians, Come to thy throne, from East and West, Making the

garland of love. Hail to Thee who unites all humanity! Hail to Thee who

controls the destiny of Bharath! Hail to Thee! Hail to Thee! Thus, I taught

the unity of all religions in the world even in those days. The

prayer song used to be sung in the school everyday morning by one and all

including the teachers happily in one voice. After I left the school on that

day, one Muslim boy by name Abdul Gafoor was asked to go up to the stage and

sing the prayer song. He had a melodious voice and could sing well. He went up

to stage, but could not sing since he became highly emotional thinking of My

separation from him. He wept uncontrollably. The students and teachers also

wept, unable to bear My separation. After sometime, the Head Master

Lakshmipathi could regain his poise and announce before the assembly, “No more

prayer for today. Come let us depart silently. Our weeping itself, unable to

bear the separation of Raju from us, is prayer for today.” The prayer ended

thus in great agony for everyone and a holiday was declared for the school.

Instead of going home, all the teachers and students gathered round the house

where I was staying. Several students came to Me and started reminding Me of

their acquaintance with Me saying, “Raju! Do you remember me? I used to sit

behind your desk.” But I did not look at their faces, even. They were very much

disappointed and wept inconsolably and left for their homes. That was really a

pathetic scene. But, I acted like that purposely, with a view to bring about a

change in them. Since then, the students are continuously after Swami. The

students of those days were so pure in their heart and innocent. They never

used to indulge in any sort of criticism, impertinent questions or evil

thoughts. In contrast, the students of the present times are becoming more and

more intelligent, with noble qualities decreasing day by day. In those days,

they were less in intelligence and more in good qualities. Finally when I

started to

return to Puttaparthi, all boys insisted on accompanying Me. In those days,

there were no Buses plying to Bukkapatnam, at least. They were plying upto

Penukonda only. From there one has to reach Puttaparthi, by a bullock cart.

That was the state of transport facilities in those days. The children were not

prepared to listen to anyone. They insisted “We will also go with Raju”. How

could this small village of Puttaparthi accommodate so many people? I,

therefore, requested the Head Master to convince those boys not to come to

Puttaparthi. I boarded the Bus. The Headmaster also shed tears at the time of

My departure. Everyone present there felt very sorry that I was leaving. But, I

did not give importance to their feelings. I am not the one to be carried away

by such emotions. I should not. Thus, while I was coming away from

Uravakonda, two boys who used to sit on the same desk alongwith Me in the

school, ran after Me calling “Raju! Raju1” From then on, My very form had

changed. My words had changed. I was questioning them “What is the relationship

between us? From where did you come? Who are you? Who am I? when Ramesh and

Suresh observed My strange behaviour, they were mentally upset. With great

mental agony, they yearned for Me calling “Raju! Raju! Raju1” The Bus started.

Unable to bear the separation, Ramesh, the son of Sirasthadar ran towards a

well nearby and committed suicide by jumping into it. He thought to himself “I

don’t want to live without Raju”. The second boy became mad, always babbling

“Raju! Raju! Raju! Day in and day out, he was talking to himself

“Raju! why did you leave us? Why did you leave us?” He did not take food and

water and always chanted My name for days on end. This type of madness is

nothing but spiritual yearning. This boy Suresh was then taken to Bangalore and

admitted in a Mental Hospital. His father approached Me and prayed “Swami! He

was sitting by your side on the same desk in your classroom in Uravakonda High

School. He is my only son. Please come once and see him.” I told him “That boy

Suresh was different. This Suresh is a different one. No useful purpose will be

served by My coming.” But, the boy’s father insisted. Hence, I had to go to

Bangalore and see the boy in the Mental Hospital. He was constantly chanting

“Raju! Raju!” He was not looking at any body. I called

him by his name and told him “Suresh! I am Raju. I have come to see you.”

Immediately, he lifted his head and saw Me. Thereafter, he closed his eyes and

died peacefully. Both Ramesh and Suresh used to tell Me always “Raju! we wish

to be with you always. We cannot bear the separation from you, even for a

moment. After both these boys died in such tragic circumstances, the classroom

in which all three of us used to sit on a desk, was locked permanently. The

desk on which we three used to sit is here even now. It was christened as “Sri

Sathya Sai Baba desk.” All the students in the school used to love Me as their

very life-breath. I also used to reciprocate My love, so intensely. I used to

share the Vadas, Pakodas etc., prepared in

our house with them. Infact, Ramesh and Suresh give up their lives for the sake

of Swami’s love. Some one asked Me later “Swami! you wrote the examination

paper on their behalf and put their names in their answer sheets. How come?” I

replied, “Ramesh is also My name. Similarly, the name Suresh also belongs to

Me. All names and forms are Mine.” When I answered thus, they could not say

anything further. Thus, if I go on narrating ‘My story’, there will no end to

it. Dear Students! when I was a student in those days, I used to help

everyone, provide happiness and joy to everyone and be jovial with every one.

Since you are students of sri Sathya Sai Institute of Higher Learning, you

emulate My example and help

everybody and share your joy with everybody. --- From the book “His Story: As

told by Himself” (A Compilation from the divine discourses of Bhagawan Sri

Sathya Sai Baba)

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