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Knowing the Self - Anil Kumar

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The Sunday Talk Given by Anil Kumar"Knowing the Self"February 27th, 2005

OM.OM.OM.Sai RamWith Pranams at the Lotus Feet of Bhagavan,Dear Brothers and

Sisters,what is the greatest achievement?I would like to share with you some

thoughts this morning. They concern someof the most important points on the

spiritual path. Consider a question thatyou will come across in every walk of

life, in every sphere of publicactivity.

 

Ask any person in the academic field, "What is your greatest achievement?" His

answer is "Sir, I have a Ph.D." A Ph.D. -- that is the greatest achievement for

a man in the academic field. If you ask a parliamentarian, "What is your

greatest achievement? " he may well say, "I could be a cabinet minister -- that

gives me the greatest satisfaction."

Ask a businessman, "What is your greatest achievement?" Expect him to say,"Well,

I could be tops in having maximum dividends on my investments."

Therefore, my friends, in every field we have certain parameters,

certainself-assigned norms, which decide the greatest achievements in our

lives.WORLDLY ACCOMPLISHMENTS ARE NOT THE GREATEST ACHIEVEMENTSActually, none

of these worldly achievements are great in any sense. Shouldwe consider

academic accomplishment the greatest achievement? Certainly not.

A discovery today, a new theory today is outdated tomorrow. If you are anexpert

today, there will be a greater expert tomorrow. Therefore, in thefield of

education one cannot hope to forever dominate, because thefrontiers of

knowledge widen every day. Even on the economic front, what weconsider to be

our greatest achievement may not, in truth, be so.During the recent tsunami,

millionaires and billionaires were reduced to thelevel of paupers and beggars.

On the political front, there cannot be any'greatest achievement', because

governments are toppled every month. Aminister today may be forced to resign

tomorrow. A no-confidence motion inthe Parliament may vote down an entire

government.There cannot be anything like the greatest achievement in any field,

albeitwe like to entertain fond notions that we could achieve

somethingspectacular. It is all fallacy, all imagination.

 

If there is any 'greatest achievement' in this world, it can be only this: to

truly, fully know the Self, to be one with the Self.THE GREATEST ACHIEVEMENT IS

TO KNOW THE SELFTo fully know the Self and to be one with the Self is the

greatest achievement in this world; there is nothing else.

 

In His discourse the other day, Bhagavan told us, "If the purpose of education

is to give you the ability to earn your daily bread, how is it that you find

birds, beasts andanimals living on their own, sustaining themselves without

receiving degreesfrom any university?"You don't find any lion getting a Ph.D.

-- no Dr. Lion. We don't find any Dr. Tiger or Dr. Fox or anything like that.

But animals do live independently; they find their own food. They are

completely capable of eating, drinking, and procreation. They need no

university degree for this purpose.

 

Therefore my friends, if at all we are to define the greatest achievement of

mankind, it is this: the ability to recognise the Self, to experience the Self,

and learning to be one with the Self.Why should this problem of not knowing the

Self exist? The simple reason isthat we identify our soul with the body.

 

We identify ourselves with the mind; we identify ourselves with the intellect.

BMI -- body, mind and intellect. But we have not penetrated the depths of the

real Self.

 

The body functions because of the Self; the mind thinks because of the Self;

theintellect discriminates because of the Self. Without the Self, these three

are non- functional.However we have forgotten the primordial, fundamental

principle of the Self.

We depend on the superficial, external, transient, ever-changing body, mindand intellect.

 

Therefore the greatest achievement of man today should be to know the Self, to

be with the Self and to experience the Self. That is what all prophets have

said, and that is what all sacred texts declare.THE SPIRITUAL PATH TO

IMMORTALITY Worldly achievements actually count for nothing. Our charity is a

matter ofvanity, our education is a matter of ego and pride, and our position

is nothing but pomp and show.

 

Without the knowledge of the Self, human life is in vain.

 

It is absolutely necessary to know the Self. The process of knowing the Self is

the only true spiritual path, which can take you to Immortality.

If I am to proceed in the spiritual path, the only way forward is to know the

Self. The only aim is to know the Self.Sometimes questions arise: What about

worship? What about meditation? Whatabout reading the scriptures? My friends,

we do not dismiss theseactivities. We do not underestimate them.

 

Reading, chanting, meditation, penance, and worship -- these are all sacred acts

that serve as our preparation; but they are never the ultimate destination, the

highestactivity -- no.

 

These serve as preparation to weed the field of the human heart. These

activities prepare you; they make your mind pure and steady.

Meditation will make the mind free from the busy traffic of thoughts.

Singing the glory of God will help to keep the mind equanimous and balanced.

Chanting will help you to concentrate. But none of these are the ultimate.THE

CENTRE OF LIFE My friends, all of these points are taken from Bhagavan's

literature. I amnot capable of giving my own interpretation, nor do I hope to

do so in future. I can only repeat, parrot-like, all that I gather from Sai

literature, from the words of Bhagavan.

 

The only way to Immortality is the path of enquiry or vicharana.

 

The path of enquiry or vicharana will take us to the very centre of our life,

the very being of our life, which is the Self.

 

This Self, this centre of life, is the core of every being.The centre of life is

the centre of the whole universe or cosmos. There is not one centre for you and

one centre for me. That very centre of our life is uniform.

 

It is the same throughout the entire cosmos -- what we call 'being', Self or

'existence'. Self, being, existence, consciousness happens to be the same for

the whole universe.

 

You and I differ in our periphery, but we are identical in our consciousness, in

that immortal energy which constitutes our very being, our very existence.Here

is a simple example: A central spot exists around which you draw circles bigger

and bigger, wider and wider. You may draw any number of circles, but the centre

remains the same. Similarly, we differ in our area; we differ in our periphery.

 

 

But the very centre of our life, the Self, continues the same. It is the centre

of the entire universe, what Bhagavan calls Atma or consciousness. Swami wants

us to always remind ourselves of this very centre of our life.

 

That action He calls 'constant integrated awareness'.CONSTANT INTEGRATED

AWARENESS Constant integrated awareness is nothing but the constant thought,

the constant effort, the constant experience, and the constant awareness of the

Self.

 

It is constant awareness of the consciousness, which is the absolute centre of

our life. This is the greatest achievement - the achievement of constant

integrated awareness. Minus this, life is not worth living.We follow many

scriptures; we follow many gurus; we approach many DivineMasters.

 

We go to different temples, mosques, synagogues, churches, and holy centres. We

go on pilgrimages. But that is all useless, a waste of money and physical

strain, if the centre of life is not known and experienced. I do not mean that

you should not go to these places.

 

Please don't misunderstand me. Please go, but remember: that is all only

preparation.Dressing up and going in your automobile to attend a wedding is all

a preparation, is it not? You have your special suit ready, you have the vehicle

ready and you reach the wedding venue. This is only preparation. The actual

witnessing of the wedding, the experience of the wedding, is different from the

preparation for arrival.Similarly, all our spiritual procedures are paths, which

are adopted to help us arrive at our ultimate destination.

 

They are a part of preparation to experience the Self, which is the culmination

of any spiritual path.

 

That is the reason why Bhagavan Baba, in every Divine discourse, particularly

makes reference to this Atma, the Self or consciousness.

 

But some of us are so busy with our own pleas, our own personal agenda, our own

prayers, our own problems, or waiting for a chance to pass on a letter to

Swami, praying that we will get a chance to sit in the front row, that we are

completelymentally occupied.

 

We have no time to listen in depth to Swami.But Bhagavan gives all this

information for one reason only: to teach usabout the Self. On one occasion,

Bhagavan Baba said, "I may say anything. Imay make people speak anything. I may

start any project. I may do anything.

It is all for one purpose -- to make you proceed along the quest, along thepath towards the Self."

 

Without awareness of the Self, we have missed the bus altogether.Bhagavan, in

His discourses, also gives a complete and thorough analysis ofthese Divine

teachings. I can collect various thoughts from His writings. Ican arrange them

topic-wise and share them with you. If I am to be called atranslator, it can be

only for my homework, not for originality and creativity.

 

Creativity is all His. Certainly, when an Avatar is in our midst, we don't need

to manipulate His words to our design. It is not at all necessary.SPIRITUAL

CONFUSIONThe second interesting thing is this: Why are we miserable? Why are we

unhappy? Why are we confused?

 

We have to accept that we are very much confused. Some people say, "Sir, is Baba

God?" after having been here in Prashanti Nilayam for ten years. A person says,

"Does Baba really know me?

Although I have here for the last ten years, does He really know my problems, or

is He God-on-vacation? What does He really know? Does He know me or

not?"Suddenly, the next morning that person says with conviction, "Baba

knowseverything!" In the morning he says Baba knows everything. During the

previous evening, he doubted if Baba knew everything or not. This is spiritual

confusion.

 

One minute we say that we should know how to conduct our lives according to

Bhagavan's principles. Later we decide to do everything that we like to do

instead. So, in our procedures and in our thought processes, we are confused.

 

Why should all this happen? We are already confused in the world, so why should

we confuse matters on the spiritual path also?CAUSES FOR SPIRITUAL

CONFUSIONBaba gives a beautiful analysis on the pathology of confusion. I am

sure youwill appreciate this. I think you will all agree with me that we are

all confused. If anyone says that he is not confused, he has to be bogus #1,

hypocrite #1! Do away with him! We want an honest discussion here. Why the

spiritual confusion?According to Bhagavan Baba, the first reason is this: I

feel I am separate from God. I feel I am different from God. I have been

thinking God is elsewhere, so I think God is separate from me. This feeling of

separateness, this feeling of difference, between the individual and Divinity

is the cause for confusion.If I think God is in Tirupathi (a famous pilgrimage

centre in South India), I think I must go and meet Him there. If God is in

Benares or

Kashi, I should certainly go and say hello to Him there.

 

If God is elsewhere, I should go there and say, "Hi Sir, how are You?" There

are so many gods all over the place, equal in number to our population! Is not

so, my friends?We think that all these centers of worship -- temples, churches,

mosques,shrines - and all these great leaders -- priests, pastors, imans, and

ministers -- will help us to take to spiritual practice.

 

We think all these pilgrim centers and all these pilgrimages will give us mental peace.

 

It is true that they are necessary.

 

At the same time, as long as I have this feeling of my own identity, separate

from God -- that I am different from Him -- the confusion will remain for

lifetimes to come.We have all gone through several lifetimes, no doubt about

it. Nobody can say, "Sir, I never had a previous life." It is akin to a tree

saying, "I don't know what a seed is. I have never been a seed." The tree today

is nothing but the sprouting, the germination, of the seed from yesterday.

 

It is only due to the seed of yesterday that we have the tree today. So we

areall here because of the previous lifetime, beyond a doubt.That doesn't mean,

however, that we need to visit so-called visionaries whowill tell us the story

of our previous life. Some people want to know who they were in the previous

life. It is a useless quest, a complete waste of money.

 

Some people do good business out of this. "Oh, yes, I'll tell what you were for

the past ten lives!" Then they present you with the bill, the accounts.

However, you don't have to pay me anything, and I'll tell you who you were for

your past one hundred lives!At one time, you must have been stupid; at another

time, you must have beena fool. That's all. Had we been perfect, had we been

realised souls, had webeen one with the Self, we would not have been born at

all!

 

A fellow appears for a supplementary examination. If he says that he is a gold

medallist, we will laugh at him. If he is a gold medallist, why should he have

to appearfor a supplementary examination at all? If he claims to be a

millionaire,why should he have go for a bank loan?

 

The very fact that I am born is proof enough that I am on an eternal journey. My

friends, we are on an eternal journey. It is not at all like flight arrivals and

departures, no, no, no!FEELING OF SEPARATENESS FROM GODIt is nothing like

arrival/departure, this spiritual journey. It is one continuous journey,

nonstop.

 

The difference is, now and then, it changes its form, that's all -- form and

name. But the journey is eternal. There will come times when we are disgusted,

vexed, bored, frustrated and depressed with this eternal journey. Though we may

like to travel, we can't keep traveling for months and months. There should be

an end to it.Similarly, this eternal journey should come to an end at some

point or other.

 

The cycle of birth and death should come to an end at some point or other. It is

possible, if only we know, if only we realise, if only we experience, if only we

identify with the Self, which is beyond the body and the mind.

 

So, according to our Bhagavan, the reason for life-after-life,

death-after-death, rebirth, and all the attendant misery and confusion, is this

feeling of separateness we entertain so wholeheartedly, this feeling of our

separate identity from God. That is one reason.THE MIND IS THE CAUSE FOR

SPIRITUAL CONFUSIONThe second reason for our confusion is uniform throughout:

our minds are responsible.

 

Mind is the cause for confusion. If anyone says, "My mind never confuses", it

only means he is out of his mind; he has become mental.

Because it is the mind that confuses one, there is no doubt about it.

TheBhagavad Gita clearly declares how confusing the mind is, how wavering

themind is, how difficult it is to control the mind.Therefore my friends, in

this present day, our minds are in a state of spiritual confusion. You may say,

"How is it so? My mind has brought me here. It is my mind that made me

prayerful. It is my mind that made me respectful. It is my mind that made me

worship Bhagavan Baba. Why do you blame my mind?""No, sir. Mind is a bundle of

desires. Spirituality tells us to be desireless."

 

If Baba kept telling us again and again that spirituality is a state of

desirelessness, if He repeatedly went on plugging this into our ears day and

night, I am sure that most of this place (the ashram) would be

vacant!SPIRITUALITY IS EXPERIENCING REALITYMany people won't take the trouble

to visit this place (Prashanti Nilayam).

We come here with multiple desires; we come here with added desires. We

wantsomething to be done; we want Swami's interference, nothing less! Immediate

Divine intervention!Somebody met me yesterday and said, "I want immediate

intervention fromSwami."

"Oh, I see! My boy, I understand it. I want it too!"(Laughter).No one is free

from this. All want His attention! Why? For their own personal problems -- for

joint pains, arthritis, spondilitis or pneumonia.

Whether it is high blood sugar, low blood sugar, blood pressure, heart ailment

or lung problems, we all have some problem or other. We have got so many things

to tell Swami that we want His attention.

 

But Baba says, "You are not the body." We are not the body, yet we come here to

speak to Him about our body problems.Somebody asked the great sage Ramana

Maharshi, "Swami, we want to know ourprevious lives". He simply laughed and

said, "You don't have to know yourprevious lives, because any number of lives

you may pass through, it is onlybody identification."

 

So long as it is body identification, it is utterly false. Until you come out of

this falsity into reality, you can never understand spirituality.Spirituality is

experiencing the reality, which is nothing but opening up orcoming out of

falsity. Those who are in cities know what falsities are.

Everything is false in a city. Even smiles are false; they don't mean anything.

On the face of it, someone may be saying, "We'll meet again", but within he

feels, "Let me not run into this fellow for the rest of my life!"

Falsity. Unless we come out of falsity, we cannot know reality. Until the

reality of the Self is experienced, there is no spirituality.THOUGHTS ARE

RESPONSIBLE FOR MISERYBhagavan Baba says the mind is the cause for confusion.

This mind does notkeep quiet. It doesn't remain stagnant; it doesn't remain

passive; it is full of thoughts.

 

Someone once remarked that if you care to note down all the thoughts that come

into your mind, putting them down on paper, ninety per cent of the thoughts we

have would be shameful thoughts. We cannot declare them openly (Laughter). It

would be a 'number two account'

(Laughter). We will not be happy with our thoughts. Come on, try it: write down

every thought that comes into our mind. "Let me jump over this man; let me

cross over this man; let me finish off that man!" (Laughter)Therefore my

friends, thoughts are responsible for all misery. These thoughts take you to an

action, and the action will necessarily give a reaction or consequence.

 

And we cannot escape from the reaction, the consequence, or the reward of our

actions -- impossible! It may be possible to bribe an income tax officer, but

not God, the 'Chief Tax Officer' - impossible! He is ready with the balance

sheet. You cannot escape Him.A thought of the mind may not be translated into

action, and that action maynot take you into reaction; but the very thought

itself will be registeredthere like software in a computer. We have to pay for

the very thought. Why?Somebody asked Shirdi Bhagavan, "Oh Swami, You are

beating Your devoteeslike this with Your stick. You are so harsh, my dear

Bhagavan. I am feeling so badly for being here. I feel so badly because either

You neglect me or manhandle me. What is all this about?"Shirdi Bhagavan

replied, "My son, I know that you are not happy to be here.But you do not know

why you are here.""Oh, I see. Swami, what made me come here?"Swami told him,

"You

prayed in the last previous life to come and be with Me.

 

Therefore you are here now and you cannot run away from Me. My dear son, you

prayed that you might be here, that you should be close to Swami.

Therefore you are here.

 

Even if you don't want be here now, you cannot get out of this, as it is the

previous life prayer answered now."The same story repeats even now. History

repeats; cassettes rewind and replay. Bhagavan Sri Sathya Sai Baba says that is

how it is. It is true.

Some of us, all of us who are devotees of Bhagavan, who are active workers in

His organisation working in different areas of service, sometimes regret being

here.WE ARE HERE DUE TO SWAMI'S WILLSometimes we may be disappointed, feeling

that we did not obtain all that wewanted in this world.

 

In times of depression, we may feel that we have not achieved anything at all,

that we have made no profit at all. We look at our friends who are not devotees

and we find them prospering.

 

Their bank accounts are full, their passbooks full, their pages full (Laughter),

and we think, 'Well, I am a fool, while my counterpart's pockets are full! What

should I do now?'It is times like this that we feel frustrated.

 

But my friends, let us be convinced of this basic fact: We are not here of our

own accord; we have not come here on our own steam.

 

We have been brought here. Bhagavan has caught us. It is His Divine Will, and we

cannot escape this Divine Will.I can give you any number of examples. A person

who was here for a week could not get Swami's attention. He was very much

enraged, very angry .

 

Out of disgust, he got up and he was about to leave the premises.Swami turned

back and walked along to him quickly, looked deeply into his eyes and said, "I

know you have been here for the past week. Are you not comfortable here?

 

You have been fighting with your wife all along (before you came here). Now you

are on vacation! Enjoy this period, my dear young man! (Laughter) If you want

to be what you were before, with your wife, all right, ask her to come here so

that the same life can be repeated! I thought that you were on vacation. I

thought you were feeling quite leisurely, enjoying your vacation. I know when

to talk to you." Then this fellow wasvery much surprised and shocked."Oh Swami,

ok, well, when will you talk to me?"Bhagavan replied, "The moment you stop

smoking. I don't relish any smell of smoke.

 

Until you give up smoking, I cannot be anywhere near you. But I know that you

have been here for a whole week."Similarly, there were many instances where

Bhagavan told many devotees, "Iknew you in your last four lives. I have known

you for the last seven lives."

 

So Swami has in His Divine 'register' all our past, present and future. Who are

we to decide it?Some people say, "Why can't we settle in Prashanti Nilayam?"

Who are you todecide this? Who are you to settle? Some fellow may say, "I have

settled here." By the evening, he may be unsettled! (Laughter)

 

There is nothing like 'settlement' and 'unsettlement'. It is only what happens

at the moment, in the moment of 'right now', that's all.Some people ask me,

"Have you settled here permanently?" I don't know.

Permanent? Can you settle anywhere permanently? Who knows the date ofexpiry? (Laughter)

 

We do have the expiry date stamped on our medicine. But we do not know the date

of expiry on our life, though God has already stamped the expiry date on

us.Therefore, there is nothing like a 'permanent resident' or a 'temporary

resident' -- nothing like that at all.

 

We are all temporary!

 

All of us are immigrants. For practical purposes, we may say that we are

'permanentresidents'. But it only means 'permanently temporary' or 'temporarily

permanent', that's all. There is no permanence as such.THE MIND IS A BUNDLE OF

DESIRESTherefore, the first reason for not knowing the Self is our feeling of

separateness from God. This is responsible for confusion. The second point is

that the mind entertains this thought, this feeling of separateness.

 

The thought takes you to action, enabling you to face the reaction and the

rewards of all your actions. This is a factor responsible for the present

mental confusion.The third point, the definition of the mind is this, as

Bhagavan Baba has often said that the mind is nothing but a bundle of threads,

of desires, closely interwoven. When threads are closely interwoven, they all

make a cloth. The cloth is made up of interwoven threads.

 

Similarly, desires which are densely, closely, compactly placed and interwoven,

will make this piece of cloth, the mind. So desires are responsible for

confusion.Somebody said yesterday, "We have come from long distances. Swami has

notlooked at us. What shall we do?"I said, "What you can do is to continue to

pray. We have to wait, that's all. There is no alternative; there is no easy

way. Even if we were successful in getting our case recommended (to Bhagavan)

by anybody, He would completely ignore our whole file. That's all there is to

it. We'll be on the black list. There are no recommendations in the 'Sai

Durbar'. Every file is judged on grounds of merit, best known only to Him."My

friends, don't get disappointed.

 

Don't think that He has not looked at you.

 

Be happy that you could look at Him. Why?

 

Know that Bhagavan looks at everybody. Because of His merciful, tender,

delicate, affectionate, loving attention and looks, we are truly, fully alive

at this moment.

 

He always looks at everybody. So it is necessary for us to look at Him.Why do

you say, "Swami, You must look at me"? He will simply laugh at you.

"I have been looking at you all along, My dear boy. You are looking at Meonly

now. Look at Me completely; look at Me thoroughly."

 

Therefore my friends, let us not be disappointed. Let us not raise the issue

saying,"Swami has not looked at me." That is all foolishness and ignorance. We

havecome here to look at Him.Someone may say that Swami looked at him. How can

I say that He has notlooked at me? How can you say that? Baba Himself gives the

answer: "Where doI look? I look all around." So Swami's looks are there all

around, on everybody. It is only our mind that really confuses this, because of

its own identity. It is more or less an ego problem, not the reality.DESIRE

MAKES ONE LOSE THE POWER OF DISCRIMINATION"OK, Swami, what shall I do now?"

Swami tells us very clearly. When desiresincrease, what happens? Desires may be

fulfilled or not, problems may be solved or not, but one thing is sure to

happen. What is it? We lose the sense of discrimination. We lose the sense of

judgment.The man who yesterday declared, "Baba is God",

today begins asking, "Is HeGod?" Why? Yesterday you said, "He is God" and today

you say, "Is He God?"Why?

 

Because we are not aware of our inner Divinity, we link up with our worldly

matters and desires. A simple example: If my son gets a seat in the medical

college, Baba is God. If he does not, is He God or not?So our understanding of

spirituality and religion is linked with our desires. Therefore we are not

happy. We lose our judgement. We lose the capacity to discriminate. The

intellect fails.

 

Therefore, Baba says spirituality or religion has got nothing to do with

desire. The purpose of religion is to make you desireless. Desireless.As we are

not aware of it, we have got any number of desires, which multiplymore and more:

'Last night I wanted to ask one question. This morning I have another question!

Two questions to ask Swami today, and tomorrow, three!'

All these questions are out-of-the question in the sight of Sai.The second

reason Bhagavan gives is this: Desires are responsible for spiritual confusion.

"So Swami, what should I do? Can You give me any other reason?"Swami says, "You

are disappointed in your life.

 

Somehow you have lost track of your life. You are not able to enjoy the gift of

life. What a tragedy this is! When God has given you this beautiful life, you

are not able toenjoy it."Some people add years to their life. Add years to

their life -- 80, 82, 84,85. It is nothing but waiting for death, waiting to

die. Let us not add years to life; no, let us add life to the years. Let us add

life to years!

There is nothing like aging. It is a life of growing. There is nothing like

retirement; there is nothing like old age. There is nothing like geriatric.

Everything is basically pediatric (Laughter). We are all children in the sight

of God.There is no such thing as an old man, please be convinced of this.

Bhagavan was joking with Joga Rao once. Joga Rao is quite old, as most of you

know.

Now he is now 102, living in Bangalore. At that time he was aged 80. Swami

started joking with him, with this 80-year-old man.Swami said, "Oh your

pants.four people will fit into your pants (because ofthe large size of Joga

Rao's body)!" We were all laughing. "Four people willfit into your trousers!"

That's how Swami was joking with him.

 

Suddenly He looked at the boys and said, "Joga Rao may be an elderly man to you;

but he is, after all, a child to Me."THE SELF IS AGELESSSo, my dear friends, let

us not consider that we are elderly people, aged people, or old people. That's

the worst disease that could ever happen. Age is a matter of time. Age is a

matter of calendar; age is a matter of years.

But the Self or Atma is beyond age. It is timeless; it is immortal; it is

nectarine, without spot or blemish. It has neither a beginning nor an end.

Knowing this, how can you say you are old?We know many elderly people, who can

work more enthusiastically than most ofthe youngsters. Many of the youngsters,

if you ask them to do any tediouswork, some laborious work for half an hour,

they will say, "Sir, I am tired.

Give me some other work." We have not come across any elderly person

complaining, and we have not met any youngster who is not complaining. Sonow,

who is actually young in spirit?The other day, when I saw some senior citizens

who were honored on the tenth(celebration date), I went around to everybody. I

know all of them. I asked," How old are you?"They said, "Seventy-five.""Stop

that nonsense," I said. "Who said you are 75? Let me see the date ofyour birth

certificate, because you don't look that old! You look so young!"My friends,

one can look young when the mind is fresh. One can look youngwhen one is

desireless.

 

One can look young when one can share others' happiness, and unhappiness as

well. One can look young when one is ever loving.

 

One can look young when one is ever sharing, loving, caring, and concerned for everybody.

 

One can look young when one is in the constant company of God. Once you are in

the constant company of God, you are always y oung. Why? Because the youngest

of the young, the oldest of the old is God Himself. He will never allow you to

age, never. Therefore my friends, our problem is that we go by time, forgetting

the Timeless. We go by our age, forgetting the One beyond age.HAPPENINGS AND

DOINGSSo, why are we missing the boat? Why are we spiritually confused?

 

Therefore, Bhagavan tells us this: We are spiritually confused because we have

notlearned to accept things as they happen in our lives.

 

We have not learned to accept things as they happen in our lives. Suppose I get

a promotion, I am happy.

 

When I am not promoted, I am unhappy. I have not learned to accept that it is

happening as it should.My friends, let us be clear about these two words,

happenings and doings.

There are only two things in life: one is 'happenings' and the other is'doings'.

Am I clear? I am not student of English; I am a student of botany.

The plants that do not speak, want me to speak on their behalf! So, there are

only two things -- happenings and doings. If anybody asks you, "Are you here?"

you should not say, " I am here." If you say, "I am here", that is a 'doing'.

On the other hand, if you say, "Well, Swami brought me here", that is a

'happening'.Once we understand what a happening is and what a doing is, we will

be ableto accept things as they come in our life -- ungrudgingly,

unconditionallyhappily, selflessly, smilingly, willfully, and joyfully.

 

I am ready to accept anything if I understand that life is full of happenings

and notdoings.A simple example: I am here in the ashram. I have been here since

last week.Nobody is encouraging me; nobody is looking at me. Even Swami is

neglectingme.

 

All these things feel like this because I consider this situation as my doing.

On the other hand, if I think that it is a happening, it so happened that I am

here; it so happened that He brought me here; it so happened that I am still

happy, even though He is not looking at me. I know it is not my doing. Looking

at me or ignoring me is a happening. It is not my doing."So Swami looked at me,

so what? (Laughter). So what? Swami gave me aninterview, then what? (Laughter).

Swami gave me a ring -- so what? So what?

I have not done anything. I am in no way greater than anybody here. I am, after

all is said and done, normal, just like everybody else." He knows best the

reason why He gave you a ring.Perhaps if He tells you the reason, you may have

to run away from here!

(Laughter) He may tell you why He has given you the ring: "I have given youthe

ring to save you from a dangerous death." Now, would you still ask, "I want a

ring, Swami?" (Laughter)"Let me not face death, I am happy without a

ring!"Similarly, if you ask Swami, "Swami, why did You give that man vibhuthi?

Whyhaven't You given me vibhuthi? I want vibhuthi now."He may very well say,

"That fellow is suffering from cancer; therefore I have given it to him. Do you

want it now also?" (Laughter)HAPPENINGS HELP TRANSCEND DUALITYSo my friends,

things happen.things happen in life; they are not doings. Ifyou think that you

do things, if situations are 'doings', you have to take the credit or

discredit. You have to feel happy or unhappy, if all the situations are your

doings.But if the situations are 'happenings', you realise, "Oh God, let the

situation play out according to Your design. I am

ready to accept it.

 

I am ready to accept it because the happenings of life will help me to transcend

the duality of pleasure and pain. Happenings will give me the temperament to go

beyond misery and happiness. I will be non-dual."

 

Therefore my friends, Bhagavan wants us to accept things as they happen in life,

so that we will not be confused.

Some people recently told me, "Sir, we have a lot of hope that Swami willcall us

for an interview." So what? If He has not called you, are you feeling hopeless

now? I am sorry, my friends.

 

Whether He does things according to your expectations or not, be convinced of

the fact that things happen as He wills, and not according to your

choice.PREFERENCE AND CHOICEIn fact, my friends, I am tempted to pass on

another beautiful idea. There are two words: 'preference' and 'choice'. Just

like happenings and doings, there is preference and choice.I ask you, "Sir,

would you prefer coffee or tea?"You say, " I prefer coffee."If I say, "Sir,

coffee is not available", you say, "Doesn't matter. I can manage with tea." In

preference, you can manage with one of the two, whereas in a choice, you choose

one over the other."Here are two drinks. What is your choice, sir?" You say you

want coffee. Isay it is not available. It doesn't matter to you. After all, you

can havecoffee some other time. With preference, you prefer one thing. When that

onething is not given, well, you would like to do

without, to remain silent.Just think this over.I will repeat once again. When

two things are there, you prefer one of them.That means the other thing is not

acceptable to you. When there are twoquestions, choose one of the two. You can

answer this one or that one. In achoice, option is given, like with

multiple-choice questions.CHOICELESS AWARENESSBut in regard to spirituality,

let us remember Baba's favorite words: "Lifeis one of choiceless awareness."

Abba, what beautiful words! If we are topick up vocabulary, let us listen to

Bhagavan Sri Sathya Sai Baba.

 

No one has ever used these words, 'constant integrated awareness' or 'CIA'.

 

He also uses this definition: "Life is choiceless awareness."What does He mean

by 'choiceless awareness'? Choiceless awareness means thatyou have no choice

(Laughter). You have no choice! "All right, Baba. You dowhat You like. You can

cancel darshan, thank You. Or You can give darshannow, ok. But if You don't,

ok." This is what is called 'choicelessawareness'.

 

Choiceless awareness will make us really happy. Choiceless awareness will give

us gratification, satisfaction and complacency. Because, if we think we have

got a choice, we will feel sad if we don't get our choice.So, preference and

choice -- let us understand this: In preference, you prefer one to the other;

but in choice, you can get along with or without one or the other. Yes, you can

choose one of the two, coffee or tea; both are available. But in spirituality,

you are choiceless."Swami, You come here for darshan at 3 'o' clock, so that we

can have an afternoon nap." That afternoon He decides to be there at 2.30 PM.

Next day you say, "Swami, since You came at 2.30 yesterday, I am here on the

dot at 2.30." He may then conveniently come at 4 'o'clock instead. Choiceless.

You have no choice in the matter. Choiceless.DOUBTS ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR

SPIRITUAL CONFUSIONLet us understand all the happenings in Prashanti

Nilayam. All the happenings relating to Bhagavan are full of this

choicelessness. Therefore, life is, in reality, one of choiceless awareness.

Knowing this will certainly help us to transcend the duality of pleasure and

pain.

 

This is the one way of getting out of spiritual confusion.Bhagavan made another

point: The mind full of doubts is responsible for spiritual confusion. Can

anybody say, "I have no doubts in my mind"? If anyone says that, well, I doubt

that he understands anything.When I say in the class, "Boys, any doubts?" If

the boys say, "Sir, we haveno doubts", I tell them, "You have not understood

anything in the class!" I am not going to accept it.

 

Students should have doubts; they should put forward their doubts. When I

explain in class, there is always the scope for doubt. There is always the

possibility of clarification, of further explanation. The student cannot say,

"I have no doubts." Impossible!DOUBTS OF A SEEKER ARE POSITIVETherefore, our

minds are full of doubts. But my friends, doubt is not anegative point. Please

let us be clear about this. Some people say, "Sir, mymind is full of doubts;

therefore, I am hopeless." You may be hopeless, but doubts are not hopeless!

(Laughter) You may be hopeless; I do accept that.

(Laughter) Continue to be so. But the point is this: Doubt is positive;doubt is

not negative.A simple example: "Sir, will Swami act in such-and-such fashion?

Will Swamisay this or that?" This is doubt. This doubt is not negative. He

wants toknow more about Swami. He wants to seek a clarification from you. He

wantsto find some explanation from you.

 

He wants to have a detailed account from you. So, the doubt of a seeker is

positive, whereas the doubt of a non-believer is negative. If you have a fellow

who doesn't believe in God, who goes on doubting, better we keep him at a

distance.

 

Because he won't leave you alone until you are also a non-believer -- finished!

(Laughter)But a devotee, an aspirant, a seeker, has doubts: "Sir, is Swami

going tospeak this evening?" Can you say that he is a useless fellow for

askingthat? No.

 

He may ask, "Does Swami know the future?" Can you say that, inasking such a

question, he is therefore not a devotee? He may say, "Is Swamigoing to cure

this patient or not? Why has this thing happened here?" Doesthis mean to say

this fellow is not a devotee?

 

No, my friends. He is a seeker. So, doubt based on prayer is positive, whereas a

doubt based on the materialistic world is negative. Doubts based on the secular

world are negative.A respectful prayer, a prayer born out of the heart, which

generates certaindoubts, will strengthen the faith, will deepen the faith, will

find a fulfillment in prayer. My friends, never treat doubt as a negative

quality.

All the doubts of Arjuna are there in Bhagavad Gita. Can we say Arjuna was

afool? No, he has expressed all his doubts to Lord Krishna, seeking

clarification from Him, so that he will have a detailed understanding of the

subject. It was not that he doubted the very Divinity of Krishna.

 

He did not doubt the Divinity; he wanted to know more about Him. Therefore

Arjuna put forward his doubts. I think I am clear.We are spiritually confused

because of doubts born out of the materialisticmind, doubts born out of the

analytical mind, doubts born out of the investigating, experimenting mind. But

a doubt born out of the existential mind, the realistic mind, the spiritual

mind is always a positive doubt.

Therefore we should cultivate a prayerful mind, a genuine mind. You doubt soas

to enhance positive faith. We will continue this next week. Thank youvery much

for your time and patience. (Applause) OM.OM.OM. Asato Maa Sad

GamayaTamaso Maa Jyotir GamayaMrtyormaa Amrtam GamayaOm Loka Samastha Sukhino

BhavantuLoka Samastha Sukhino BhavantuLoka Samastha Sukhino BhavantuOm Shanti

Shanti Shanti

- courtesy Sairam Website, http://www.ssso.net

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