My true and astonishing experiences with Baba

[Guest guest]

Today I got chance to visit swami pages

again on internet. This is just Swami's grace only. And happened

to see the link to send experiences in mail then by swami's grace I

got thought of giving mail to you people. Really I am thankful to

swami, not only thankful if I surrendered myself to swami also It

can not worth it. There is no way that I can give anything and that

is equal to swami's grace. So I want to tell my experiences with

swami as my heart is blowing that, I had grace of swami in this

janma. I can't explain really what my heart is feeling now. My

experiences time span is very very small but I can narrate one book

from my experiences, but still I can not tell about swami by

narrating the experiences. Just I want to share with somebody about

my experiences and if they felt happy then I will be more happy.

 

 

When I am studying in Bhagawan Sri Sathya Sai High School in AP,

INDIA, I don't have any belief on god. But still my Head Mistress

is very very much follower of swami from 1960's (I think), I used to

heard about him. But still I hated swami a lot in those days. And

then I am facing lot of problems in my life, at the age of 15 years,

then suddenly I turned into a devotee of Shirdi Sai Baba. I had very

much love towards Shirdi Sai. At that time my goal is to go to

Shirdi. But up to 2001 I didn't get chance to go there. Almost I

fought 4 years then I got chance in 2001(he allowed me only). After

within 2 months I went to USA and stayed there long time, almost 2

and ½ years. When I am in flight March 2001, My mom got dream

about shirdi sai baba that he showed his grace on my mom and

telling "Nothing will happen to your girl. I will be with

her". My mom woke up and told to my dad about the dream and within

after 30 minutes I called up my parents from Bombay airport that I

stucked up in Bombay and I am coming back to Hyderabad. That is very

late night time and my parents got so much of tension as I am the

only girl and fighting with things in Bombay airport and also new

to everything.

By Baba's grace I got one old man from Hyderabad to Bombay and he

is coming back from Bombay to Hyderabad the very next day. He gave

lot lot help upto I reach Hyderabad in return flight. I fought with

so many things in Bombay airport and I can tell now is "BABA IS WITH

ME". That's it. Rather than this word I am not getting

anything.

That much BABA helped me in Bombay airport. As I said about my

mom's dream, from that moment onwards she turned into as BABA devotee.

And I got jealous on my mom that she saw in dream, but I am not.

But afterwards I realized that she had pure heart and love, that's

why he gave darshan for her eventhough she is not devotee of him before.

 

 

When I am in USA I got so many problems. I can say that no girl can

get those problems. I came up from well settled family. But still I

fought for one day food and one night food. At the beginning I used

to stay with my dad's relatives in USA. Both husband and wife are

my uncle and aunt. Aunty she didn't give me food or any liquid

otherthan water. If I took anything to eat from kitchen, she used to

say that I am thief. These all are new to me and got frustrated. I

want to die at that time. Then I remembered in India how I used to

live. As I am new to America I can not go outside and can not get

food. Even uncle used say that he is busy and not let me to go to

food mall and get some food. At that time I bared 15 days and after

that I can not. And made a call to my parents and told I am very

much hungry. Then my mom fainted and next day onwards she used to go

to Shirdi Sai temple and spent day and night there just with the

pray "Give some food to my girl there". And after 15 days

Shirdi Sai gave again darshan to her and asked her "give me food".

Then my mom gave food in big pot and baba ate everything and blessed

my mom and told "I will take care of her". On that day onwards

no matter of where I am, I used to get enough food.

 

 

Aunty tortured me in all ways as mentally. I can not say now how

much I got the mental tention there. She is great devotee of Sathya

Sai Baba. And forced me to do bhajans to Sathya Sai. I used to hate

her that I don't want to do any pooja for him. Later on aunty

gave too much mental torture and in nights I used to pray in front

of his (Sathya Sai) life size picture and used to weap that I can not

bear all these things. At that time Sathay Sai baba blessed me with

books of sanathana saradhi. By reading them I used to get self

realization and used to get some peace. Then onwards I am great

devotee of him also and I love him very much. Later on I used to cry

for not realizing him when I am in India and very much desire about

to get darshan of him. One fine day he listened my words and came

into my dream. In dream he is laughing loudly and surprisingly

I am seeing him. But not doing anything. He waited for some time

and gave chance to reach him but my mind hadn't get any idea.

He disappeared.

Then I realized and getting pain that I am unable to use that chance.

Then again with in 10 minutes he gave again darshan and again

laughing loudly. Surprisingly I saw him again and I ran towards

him and I just his hands into my hands very tightly. Then he stopped

his laugh and told to me "You are holding me very tightly. I just

want this" and he disappeared. On that day I got so much of happy.

 

 

Before this darshan one night I called up my parents and my mom told

me that my dad got sugar disease. Then I cried a lot in mid night

that am here and I can not do anything for them. I prayed baba that

don't do anything to my parents(I am the only daughter for them).

Then I am getting sixth sense that Sathya Sai baba is giving darshan

to me. But I prayed baba don't give darshan to me, if he gives in

that stage I will die. And he didn't give any visible darshan to

me and but I smelled the jasmine flowers smell. I realized that,

that is "Vibhuthi" smell and baba is with me.

 

 

And another day in work I poured myself 160F of boiling water and my

skin is getting bubbles and very much red. I can not bare pain and I

got remembered that I had Shirdi vibhuthi with me and ran to my

purse place and applied vibhuthi on my hand. Very very astonishingly

I got rid with pain in 5 minutes and don't have any bubbles and

red marks on my skin. I am very fair. But I could not see any red

color mark on my hand. THIS IS JUST MIRACLE WITH MY BABA ONLY.

 

 

And then he used to give messages that come to India. And I am

unable to take decision. So I left the decision to him. After I left

my decision to baba then with in one day I just got ticket and

within 2 days I am in India. The next day after I reached India, I

checked my mails and I got one mail from MAharshi University that I

can come and join there in MS. I missed that. If baba doesn't

give me ticket in one day I would have stayed there only. But that

is not baba's wish.

 

 

After I came to India, with in 10 days I got dream about Shirdi Sai

BABA first time. He gave me darshan as in pure white and is very

very handsome. He just gave darshan for 5 seconds only. But I could

not take that so I got afraid of him and got loose motions all

night. I got sick.

 

 

After that my life changed totally. When I am doing bhajans I used

to get one scene all the time as movie in front of the eyes. The

scene is like this "Shirdi Sai baba gave darshan and statue

turned into real human body, he gave place at his lotus feet between

the statue and Samadhi and saying to everybody MY GIRL CAME TO ME

AFTER SO LONG TIME. SEE HER. SHE IS MY GIRL". And when he is saying

these words he is very very very happy. I can't describe it now. This

is my first experience and this is not a dream. This happened with

all my senses are very much active.

 

 

Like that baba gave lot of things, lot of scenes. And he told about

lot lot things. At that time I didn't realize those are precious

moments in my life. I don't know the value of those scenes also.

He used to give darshan all day and night. When I want to see him

just I will close my eyes and the scene will start. I don't have any

control on scenes. One day he asked me to put all 6 devils(kama,

krodha………….) on his feet then he can take control on them.

but I gave him he did not accept that. I gave him but I didn't accept

that internally. Then he gave one punishment to me that he didn't

give any darshan for 3 days. If I close my eyes, I visioned that

empty chair. He is not sitting there. Then I prayed him heart fully,

then after 3 days he gave darshan asked him to do heart fully again.

And on that day I did morning pooja and gave whole heartedly.

At that time I saw, one white big flower just dropped from me on

his feet. I don't know what that is at that time. After wards when I

am reading the book of swami, in that book swami said that is "MY

HEART FLOWER". And I felt very happy.

 

 

He gave so many scenes purely based on my personal things. So I

don't want to relieve them here. Swami told me "don't

relieve them people will laugh at you". So I won't. He told me so

many that how I can manage my "manasu", how I can behave with other

people, how can I live……………not only these, everything what an human

being need in his/her life. Everything he told to me. But at that

same time I got mismanaged by some body. When I am going to believe

them, swami told me "those things I am not telling to them to do.

They are purposely doing." But at that time I could not figure

it out what is real thing. And managed me that I can take "sanyasam".

My mom and dad got so much pain with things. They asked me to come

back. But I am not in a stage to listen. As I thought swami is doing

all these. Some times swami also gave wrong direction. At that time

I got very much angry on swami. But if he don't do like that I wont

get to know what they are doing and will go to spoil myself. Now I

realized he gave wrong direction for my life only. He saved me a

lot from that. I can not tell now. After that I thought he is

talking everyday and every minute when ever I want then also I just

went in to wrong direction, then what about other people. I can not

say anything. But swami will take care of them.

 

 

After 6 months that I landed in India, he blessed me and gave chance

to went to puttaparthi. Frist time in my life I got darshan. For 3

days I got very very closer darshan but he didn't see me. If he

saw my next person also he didn't see me. I thought that he is

wantedly doing. But I didn't think that I am not going in his direction

so he is giving punishment. But he told me that when I am going to

leave puttaparthi he will satisfy me. So last day of my darshan I asked

him very angrily "if I am your girl then you have to see me. Then

only I will believe that I am your girl". So I got closer darshan

of swami and he just straightly looked into my eyes around 10 seconds.

I can not control myself and wept in darshan hall only. One widow ,

who just sat by next to me, she asked me that swami saw you what you

asked him. I told her what I asked. And I also I told her about my

situation. Then she got surprise and told me , "you are very lucky,

you had so much of relation with swami in poorva janmas, that is why

he is giving all darshan's, I am living in Prashanthinilayam from

past 30 years, I can not say how will be his path to get people to

Prashanthinilayam. With my experience with swami, I can say that he

wont leave you, he will test you in all ways, be prepare for that.

He will give you very good life. Don't leave him. You are very very

lucky girl and you are his girl only. You can say anybody that they

are good but you can not say they are god's child. But you are god's

child. You gifted with that. I don't know why he choosed you.

Just go in his path. After conversation with her I felt very very very

happy that she realized what I am going through and she got belief

in me. Probably she met with so many people in swami's ashram

from past 30 years. At that my parents don't have any belief on me.

But she put belief on me. That's why I am so happy on that day.

 

 

After that when we are preparing to leave Puttaparthi, me and my mom

going to museum, as Seva dal also told me Museum will open for

3:00PM to 4:30PM. So we thought to go to museum and will go by train

at 5:30PM. I asked around 5 to 10 Seva Dal members that the museum

will open or not?. All those told me that will open. And we are

walking, suddenly swami came outside and coming towards to south

Indian canteen. I stood up in front of south Indian canteen and got

one more darshan. At this time the distance between swami and me is

just 1 or 2 feets. I got so much of satisfaction with this darshan.

He saw my mom and went. And we just walking towards to museum and

again I asked volunteer at the back side gate of prashanthi nilayam,

he told me that will close in the afternoons. I got astonished and

we just returned to go into ashram. And again the same seva dal

person told us that swami is going to stadium so run to main road.

Then my mom and myself started running towards main road and stood

for darshan and again he gave darshan very closely. At this time the

distance is 1 feet only. Again I got so much of satisfaction, that

means I reached upto maximum and whatever happened in between to get

these 2 darshans , those are swami's wish only. After these he told

me "close your eyes and come to me". I just closed my eyes and I got

vision that "Swami is sitting in the chair. He told me that take

pada namaskara, I took that. And he told me YOU ARE NOT HAPPY WITH

ME. SO I CAME TO GIVE DARSHAN. NOW ARE YOU SATISFIED?(I said yes)

YOU ARE MY CHILD. DON'T THINK THAT YOU ARE NOT MY CHILD.", like this

he talked with me for 15 minutes and gave permission to leave

puttaparthi. Really I got satisfied when I am leaving puttaparthi.

 

 

I told to swami that I can not decide what is correct and what is

not, so give me right direction to go in to right path. After that

so many things happened and then I got to know those people are so

bad. And I left them right away. I thought those will get good

lesson in life from swami because of their thinking. Swami gave

punishment to me in lot of things why because I didn't listen his

words. Swami gave wrong direction to me and he showed me what are

the things are going on outside by telling his name. then I left

those people. But I did things with those ,so swami gave big big

punishment to me. And he gave lot of shakthi also to face that

punishment.

 

 

In the beginning stage Shirdi Baba used to come in my visions and

after November 23rd 2003 swami came into my visions. If I ask about

Shirdi Baba then only he gave darshan's in SHirdi roopam otherwise

Swami took place in my scenes. At the first I dnt have believe that

both are one, as I had so much of luv in Shirdi baba , almost 3 or 4

times I got one vision that ,first I used to see SHIRDI BABA in

simhasana and then slowly he is turning into SATHYA SAI roopa. Then

I used to believe in both roopas.

 

 

When I am doing bhajan then I used to see one scene, that "I am at

his lotus feet, sitting and singing bhajana with whole heartedly and

swami used to put his abhaya hastha on my head all the way to my

singing". On Nov 23rd 2003, swami asked me "you want ARTHANARISWARA

ROOPA darshan". I said `yes'. Then he gave me darshan. I saw

everything but I could not feel it. But now also that picture gave

permanent impact on my manasu. I could not forget that darshan. I

remembered each and every scene what swami gave to me. I asked

swami, that I caould not feel that darshan from bottom of my heart.

He told me you can not hold me so I am giving you partial darshan. I

said ok.

 

 

And one fine day lord Ganapathi, KAlika devi amma (with ugra

roopam), Swami (with ugra roopam) gave darshans to me. Like a series

I used to get visions on all these god's one by one. First Ganesha

used to give darshan and pada namaskara, next amma used to give

darshan and padanamaskara and swami used to give darshan and

padanamaskara and then Shirid Sai. Almost all one month I got all

these god's darshans. In those darshans amma told me "YOU ARE MY

CHILD. YOU DIDN'T REMEMBER THAT. BUT I KNOW. I KNOW YOU FROM VERY

LONG TIME." , and took me in her hands and gave hug and kiss.

 

 

In one darshan amma gave KALIKA roopam , the scene is like this "I

AM TAKING PADA NAMASKARA FROM SHIRDI SAI. AND SUDDENLY SHIRDI BABA

SAW SOME DEVILS ARE COOMING ON ME. AND RIGHT AWAY GOT UGRA ROOPA AND

SHOWING THEM HIS RIGHT ARM FINGURE AND TOLD STAY THERE. AND baba

SCREAMED VERY LOUDLY "KALIKA………………..". THEN AMMA GAVE DARSHAN WITH

UGRA ROOPAM AND KILL ALL THOSE DEVILS. AND LATER ON BABA TOLD ME

THOSE ARE MY KARMAS AND COMING TO EAT ME. HE ASKED ME TO GIVE

MANAGALA HARATHI TO AMMA. I GAVE TO HER AND SHE GAVE PADA NAMASKARA

TO ME AND BLESSED ME. I ASKED AMMA I AM NOT GETTING AFRAID BY SEEING

HER UGRA ROOPA. THEN SHE REPLIED YOU CAN NOT SEE MY UGRA ROOPA SO I

AM SHOWING YOU THE PARTIAL ONE.". like this I used to get all

time.

 

 

I performed poojas in Srisailam for Ganesha and Amma. There after I

performed homam for Ganesha, after completing that one, Ganesha gave

darshan and told me "NO PROBLEMS WILL COME TO YOU" and gave

MANAGALASUTHRA for me. And as per amma's direction I took one sari,

blouse, kumkuma and pasupu. There I noticed that people are not

allowing anything near to amma. I asked her what can I do. She told

me that "THEY WILL TAKE. YOU JUST TAKE OVER THERE". And there I gave

it to priest then he accepted and just throwed those things near to

amma's feet. And I felt very happy. But I saw that he never accepted

the other people saris.

 

 

And then amma gave one more vision and told that "I GAVE MY BREAST

MILK TO YOU. YOU DID NOT REMEMBER THAT. BUT I REMEMBERED. I WILL DO

EVERYTHING FOR YOU AS MOM. I WILL DO YOUR MARRIAGE." And she hugged

me and gave kiss. And she put kumkuma on my face and on the line in

head and pasupu she put that on my feet and also gave managaluthra

with pasupu, kumkuma on it. And then Swami and Shirdi baba also gave

darshans and gave mangalasuthra with kumkuma and pasupu.

 

 

Like these so many things happened and so many things they did and

so many things told to me.

 

 

One and more important thing that swami showed me. That is "SWAMI IS

SITTING IN SIMHASANA. I JUST TOOK PADA NAMASKARA. AND RIGHT AWAY I

SAW THAT WE ARE IN MIDDLE OF THE HALL. THE HALL IS VERY BIG. I

DIDN'T SEE ANY ENDING WALLS FOR THAT HALL. BUT I SAW SEALING FOR

THAT. IN THAT BIG HALL THERE IS ONLY ONE SMALL UPSTAIR IS THERE.

OTHER THAN THAT NOTHING I SAW. AND I THOUGHT THAT IS DEVENDRA

BHAVANAM. AND SWAMI SIMHASANA ALSO STRETCHED THAT I CAN ALSO SIT

ALONG WITH SWAMI. SWAMI ASKED ME TO SIT ON SIMHASANA. I SAT ON

SIMHASANA OPPOSITE TO SWAMI. AND HE PUT HIS ABHAYA HASTHA ON MY HEAD

AND STARTED READING SOME MANTHRAS. I THOUGHT THOSE ARE VEDAS. AFTER

PERFORMED THOSE AND I SAW EVERYBODY LIKE VISHNU,BRAHMA,SIVA,LAKSHMI,

SARASWATHI, DEVATHAS,ANGELS, MAHARSHIS, DEVATHALA GURUVU AND ETC………

BUT I DIDN'T SEE PARVATHI WITH THEM. THEY

CAME AND POURING FLOWERS, AKSHINTHALU ON ME AND SWAMI WHEN SWAMI

PERFORMING THE MANTHRAS. SWAMI ASKED TO TAKE PADA NAMASKARA FROM ALL

THOSE. UP TO THAT I AM SEEING THEM IN AIR. THEY CAME ON FLOOR OF

HALL AND I TOOK PADA NAMASJARA FROM EACH AND EVERY BODY. SWAMI TOLD

TO ME THIS IS PERFORMED IN YOUR TIME UP TO 45 MINUTES BUT IN

SPIRITUAL TIME 8 HOURS I PERFORMED THIS. SWAMI TOLD THAT YOU ARE MY

CHILD. IN LAST BIRTH ALSO YOU ARE MY CHILD ONLY. YOU HAVE TO DO SO

MANY THINGS FOR ME. FOR THAT I SELECTED YOU. NOW ONWARDS YOU HAVE TO

LIVE AS SAI'S CHILD. I WILL TELL YOU WHEN AND WHERE YOU HAVE TO

START MY COMMANDS. BUT BEFORE THAT YOU HAVE TO MOULD YOURSELF IN TO

MY WAY. IF PEOPLE SAW YOU, THEN RIGHT AWAY THEY WILL GET THOUGHT, YA

SHE IS BABA'S CHILD. LIKE THAT YOU HAVE TO MOULD YOURSELF. SO MANY

PEOPLE ARE THERE. I DIDN'T SELECTED THEM AS MY CHILD. BUT WITH YOU

MY RELATION IS DIFFERENT. SO I GAVE AN OPPORTUNITY TO YOU THAT YOU

CAN OBLIGE MY COMMANDS AND DO THE THINGS ACCORDINGLY. I AM WAITING

FOR YOU FROM SO LONG TIME. YOU DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH I WAITED FOR YOU.

NOW YOU CAME. STILL I AM WAITING FOR YOU. COME IN TO ME. COME IN TO

ME. YOU HAVE TO STAY SOME MORE TIME IN NORMAL LIFE. YOU HAVE TO TAKE

CARE OF SOMETHINGS IN REAL LIFE, THEN ONLY I WILL CALL YOU. UP TO

THAT YOU HAVE TO LEAD NORMAL LIFE. ONE DAY I WILL ANOUNCE YOU THAT

YOU ARE MY CHILD. DON'T FEEL BAD THAT I AM NOT GIVING ANY PADA

NAMASKARA AND NOT GIVING INTERVIEWS PHYSICALLY. MORE THAN THAT YOU

HAD THIS OPPORTUNITY. THIS IS IMPORTANT. NOT THE PHYSICAL THINGS.

NOW SATISFY WITH THESE THINGS. AFTER THAT AS YOUR HEART HAD DESIRE

THAT YOU WANT TO LIVE WITH ME AND YOU WANT INTERVIEWS AND PADA

NAMASKARA……..I WILL GIVE EVERYTHING. BUT YOU HAVE TO WAIT FOR RIGHT

TIME. OUT SIDE PEOPLE THEY HAVE TO COME HERE AND THEN ONLY THEY CAN

SEE ME. IN YOUR CASE THAT IS DIFFERENT , WHEN EVER YOU WANT AND

WHERE EVER YOU WANT I AM COMING IN TO YOUR PICTURE. IF I WISH ONLY

THEN YOU CAN GET A CHANCE TO SEE ME OTHERWISE NO. SO UTILISE IT."

like this swami told me lot of things. And he gave kiss on my fore

head with love.

 

 

After all the things over, my dad sent me to Bangalore to get job

over here in Feb 2003 . As I came and I am trying job here. I missed

swami so much and he called me to puttaparthi. I went and got

darshan. Her also he is the only one who is giving direction. Here

some things are went wrong. In my visions once "SWAMI, AMMA, SHIRID

SAI, ALL DEVATHAS, ALL MAHARSHIS AND ALL GODS AND GODESS ALONG WITH

THRIMURTHI. BUT STILL ABSENCE OF PARVATHI HERE ALSO. AMMA TOOK ME

INSIDE AND SHE GAVE ABHYANGANA SNANA WITH HER OWN HANDS AND DID

ALANKARA. I AM LOOKING LIKE AS A BRIDE. BEFORE I CAM INSIDE, I SAW

ONE KALAYANA MANTAPA WHERE ONE GUY SAT AND IN FRONT OF HIM ONE

PRIEST. BELOW THE DIAS SWAMI, SHIRDI SAI, GANESHA, THRIMURTHI TOOK

SEATS ALONG WITH AMMA. AND AFTER THAT ALL ASSEMEBLED IN THE HALL.

THIS HALL SAME AS I GOT IN ANOTHER VISION AS ABOVE. WITH EVERYTHING

AMMA CAME WITH INTO HALL AND TO SIT BESIDES OF ONE PERSON. I SAT ON

DIAS. THEY ARE PERFORMING MY MARRIAGE. THAT I CAN UNDERSTAND. I AM

SURPRISINGLY SEEING EVERYTHING. SWAMI TOLD ME THAT DEVATHALA GURUVU

IS PERFORMING YOUR MARRIAGE. AFTER THEY PERFORMED EVERYTHING THEY

TOLD ME TO TAKE PADA NAMASKARA FROM EVERY BODY. I WENT TO TAKE

SWAMI'S PADA NAMASKARAM FIRST. BUT SWAMI REFUSED AND TOLD ME TO TAKE

GANESH PADA NAMASKARAM FIRST. HE BLESSED ME "DEERGA SUMANGALI BHAVA".

AND THEN I TOOK AMMA'S, SHE BLESSED ME WITH "DEERGA

SUMANGALI BHAVA". AND TOLD ME THAT YOU ARE MY CHILD SO I AM DOING

EVERYTHING FOR YOU. I WILL SEND YOU TO YOUR HOME WITH EVERYTHING

THAT ONE INDIAN GIRL NEEDS IN HUSBANDS HOME. I WILL GIVE PASUPU,

KUMKUMA, SARE EVERYTHING. AND AMMA HUGGED ME AND I SAW TEARS IN HER

EYES. AND THEN I TOOK SHIRDI SAI'S PADA NAMASKARA, BABA HUGGED ME

WITH GREAT LOVE AND CRYING VERY MUCH THAT "ARE YOU LEAVING ME NOW".

THEN I GOT TEARS IN MY EYES. AND THEN I WENT TO TAKE SWAMI'S PADA

NAMASKARAM. HE DIDN'T SHOW ANY FACE FEELING. AND I GOT ASTONISHED.

BUT I SAW INE THING THAT HIS EYES ARE LITTLE BIT WET. HE IS GETTING

VERY PAIN IN HIS HEART. AND THEN I TOOK FROM EVERY BODY'S PADA

NAMASKARAM AND AFTER THAT AMMA PERFORMED SO MANY POOJAS IN PRESENCE

OF ALL AND THEY SENT ME TO MY HUSBANDS HOUSE. AMMA GAVE ME EVRYTHING.

 

 

After these two major scenes I am getting every day swami in my

visions he is telling me what I can do. If I am not listening

anything then right away he is giving punishment then I can mould

myself totally into his way. And I had an habit of not listening

some things from my parents. I had so much affection and love on

them. but still some times I wont listen. Swami made me to listen

their words. For some time, like almost 3 or 4 months swami rarely

came into my visions. At that time he didn't give any help. I am

going through the hard time at that period. So I used to take my

dad's decisions in that. After went through all I got angry on swami

and told him "you are not seeing me. If I made mistake and gave pain

to them also, my parents are doing help for me. So I am going to

give everything first to them and then only you. I will give respect

first to them and then only you". In angry I told to him like this.

But in reality swami made me to give everything to my parents first

and then only him. After that he gave vision in that he told me "NOW

YOU ARE MY CHILD. NOW I AM SO HAPPY. YOU ARE SAI'S CHILD.". He told

me like this why because, I decided that I will give all rights on

me to my parents in all aspects, means my desire now is what ever

they are thinking and want that come in to true in their lives.

Their goal is obviously me. So I decided that to give all happiness

to them. so swami told me like that.

 

 

When he is in White field, I went for darshan. At that time i got

selected in one big MNC company but they are delaying to send my

offer letter to me. I asked swami in vision about that. He told me

that "YOU WILL GET OFFER FROM THAT COMPANY ONLY. YOU ARE NOT GOING

TO ANY OTHER COMPANY. IT IS GOING TO HAPPEN. JUST BE WITH PATIENCE."

After that the same company gave offer letter and now I

am working for that company only. And on Eshwaramma's day he told to

come to White Field. I went there with my friend. And I am in very

much pain on that day and asked swami, you are not seeing me from

past few days. You forgotten me. If I am your girl then give a look

at me today. And then I am in darshan line swami came with injured

hand on terrous and gave straight look at me. My friend is asking he

knows you or what? (she don't have belief on him). I felt happy. And

swami gave vision and told to me that "YOU ARE GOING TO GET OFFER

LETTER FROM THAT COMPANY. BUT SHE IS NOT(my friend)". She also

selected to the same company where I got selected. As swami said it

happened. I am in this company only. But she is not.

 

 

In another vision swami angryly walking in one room and showing my

friend and told to me that "I WILL TAKE CARE OF HER. I WILL TAKE

CARE OF HER. I WILL SEE HER". I didn't understand at that time. But

after wards I realized that how much she did on back of me. Then I

realized that words importance. Like same vision came in another

friend case also. Then I got realized that person after wards. Like

that swami is telling to me before only. But because of maya I am

not realizing those things.

 

 

If I do any mistakes by knowingly or, not by knowingly also, he used

to come in visions and used to give slaps on my face. Once swami

told me that don't give pain to your parents but I called them up

and screamed on them. They got pain. Right away swami came in to my

visions and gave slaps like left and right on my face. That is not

giving real impact as physical. But it is giving so much of impact

on my heart. Then I am not doing those afterwards. Some times with

very much of love he used to call me and used to beat a lot. He wont

spare if I do anything wrong. if still I am not listening he will

give hard punishment to my life. I dnt give any path to escape from

that. I have to bare that. That's it.

 

 

He had so much of love on me. And at the same time, he is very cruel

in giving punishments.

 

 

But I never saw Shirid sai as angry on me. Shirdi Sai used to tell

very convincingly the things but not swami. I heard that Shirdi Sai

form is with Anger as he is siva and Swami form is love as he is

Shiva Shakthi. But in my case it is just opposite. Shirdi Sai used

to give lot of love to me and Swami used to beat me in many things.

 

 

Some times if I want to cry just I will go to Swami and put my head

on his lap and holding his legs with my two arms tightly and used to

cry. Swami used to put his hand on head with great affection.

 

 

All of the things above swami is commanding to go and fullfill my

parents wish. Swami is telling first give everything to your parents

and then to me. They are ordent devotees of baba. Particularly my

mom is very much follower of baba. Oneday swami came into my vision

and told me "First full fill your parents wish. You have to follow

what they are saying. You have to take care of them. I am not going

to full fill your wishes. There is no space of your wish. Whatever

your parents wish will then i will do their wish not yours. So

listen and follow their words. If you don't follow thier words i

won't be with you. If you follow, whatever you pray for, i will do

that."..........so on.........In this way swami mould me into my

parents path. Now they are happy. Previously also they don't have

any unbelief on me. But in some cases i wont listen their words. Now

swami made me to listen their words in all ways. My parents are very

happy now and they very very much thankful to swami.

 

 

And in so many forms swami gave darshans. But I am stopping here. If

want to tell about them but i took lot of space.

 

 

SO MANY THINGS ARE THERE ABOUT SWAMI IN MY LIFE. HE IS WITH ME, IN

ME, BESIDE ME, TOP OF ME. HE IS TAKING CARE OF EACH AND EVERYTHING.

I DID SO MANY MISTAKES IN MY LIFE. HE GAVE PUNISHMENT AND STILL

GIVING PUNISHMENTS. BUT THOSE ARE NOT PHYSCIAL THINGS. HE IS GIVING

PUNISHMENTS TO MY "HEART". AND IS GIVING OPPORTUNITY AND HELPING ME

TO REALIZE MYSELF INNERLY. BECAUSE OF HIM ONLY I AM GETTING SELF

REALIZATION. MY PARENTS ALSO CAN NOT TAKE CARE OF ME LIKE THIS. ONLY

SWAMI WILL DO. I AM WAIITNG A CALL FROM HIM. THEN I CAN JUMP IN TO

HIM AND SERVE HIM WITH MY SMALL LIFE.

 

 

Thanks for Swami by giving an opportunity that I can share my

experiences with some body else's. And they can enjoy. Probably they

can see Swami's path differently in my case.

 

 

Thanking You

 

Sai Devotee

[Guest guest]

Sairam dear sister,

 

It was a great delight reading your love story with Swami. It is

absolutely true that the sweetness of Swami's Leelas is beyond

description. One can try to share the bliss they experienced with

others but the exact feeling of love is known only to the heart that

experiences His Love.

 

One can feel happy by listening to others' experiences but only when

one realizes how much Swami has done for him/her....that

experience.....that one moment of bliss, feeling His closeness....is

worth the labour of thousand births!

 

Thank you so much sister, for your wonderful lovestory. Your innocent

narration has deeply touched my heart. How blessed is to be a daughter

of pure heart to our most beloved Father! You are blessed, sister! I

also try my best to be His boy! A Swami's boy. Its my dream which I

strive to realize every moment. A Swami's boy with pure heart. With

just one space in it....For Swami's Chair :-) Nothing else. Just to be

attached day and night to Swami and Swami alone!

 

It is only when one really gets frustrated with the world, only when

one sees the imperfections in the human beings and human relations,

that the "Vairaagya" arises in the mind and one realizes the sweetness

of Divine Love that is available only with Bhagavan Sri Sathya Sai

Baba.

 

And Swami has physically told the devotees so many times that His

mental Darshan and mental closeness is more desirable than His

physical nearness. Your visions, your dreams, your chats and fightings

with Swami are sweet. You only know their sweetness, their beauty!

This is true with everyone. Everyone of us has a speacial personal

relationship with Swami...

 

Swami is Lord Sai Krishna who has a private Divine romantic

relationship with each and everyone of us, irrespective of age, caste,

creed and sex. And there would be definitely those moments in the

lives of each one of us, when we realize no other relationship in the

world that we maintain is as worthy as the one we have with

Swami.....The moment when we realize there was none who loved us as

much as He did...and there is none who is really worth shedding tears

for other than Him!

 

Towards the end of your email, you wrote this sentence: "MY PARENTS

ALSO CAN NOT TAKE CARE OF ME LIKE THIS. ONLY SWAMI WILL DO."

 

This is what exactly Swami told in His Discourse on last-to-last

MahaSivarathri. It is very much unjustified to call it a Discourse. It

was a shower of LOVE. It is a cascade of Love, a hurriacane, thoofaan

of Love. His words would sweep you off your feet and you will get lost

in the force of His Love....

 

He said, "Even your parents cannot understand your feelings...I only

know what you think...your hopes and aspirations...I shall take care

of you...."

 

Oh God!!!! What are these words? In the past two decades I have lived

on earth, I have never seen some one who spoke these words to me...I

have never heard someone telling me...."I shall take care of

you...."....May be somebody has told me...but I know their physical

and mental limitations....But these words are spoken by GOD, The

CREATOR Himself...

 

I jumped up and ran outside shouting....."Rejoice, guys! Its party

time! God told me He will come with me always...."

 

hahaha....

 

Sweet are those moments....Sweet is this life, blessed is this body

which can see the Love Embodied in the Form of Bhagavan Sri Sathya Sai

BABA.

 

JAI SAIRAM

Enjoy!

 

 

 

 

On Apr 1, 2005 2:09 PM, nprg_2004 <nprg_2004 wrote:

>

> Today I got chance to visit swami pages

> again on internet. This is just Swami's grace only. And happened

> to see the link to send experiences in mail then by swami's grace I

> got thought of giving mail to you people.

[Guest guest]

Sai Ram Sister,

 

Really you are GODs child. Swami will never ever leave you.

 

P kumar

 

 

 

On Fri, 01 Apr 2005 11:09:14 -0000, nprg_2004 <nprg_2004 wrote:

 

> Today I got chance to visit swami pages

> again on internet. This is just Swami's grace only. And happened

> to see the link to send experiences in mail then by swami's grace I

> got thought of giving mail to you people.

[Guest guest]

Thank you for sharing your personal experiences with Swamy. Its a great joy to

read on. Hope Swamy bless all of us in the way he pleases. Thank you again.

 

Sai Devotee

[Guest guest]

What a wonderful experience.... Its a great feeling to read to such experience.

sairam.

Sheela.K.Rao.

[Guest guest]

Hi

 

Ya. whatever u wrote is true. One can know the joy of leelas of

swami when he gave an experience to that devotee particularly. We

can not narrate. I am so so happy that i had swami's anugraham in

all aspects. I can not tell that how much i am lucky. Still today

also i am getting so many visions.

 

I wish all people will have swami's grace and fullfill

their wishes and also wish all will follow swami's path.

 

Jai Sairam

 

Sai Devotee