Guest guest Posted September 14, 2005 Report Share Posted September 14, 2005 Something to break up all the seriousness around here. Have a good laugh. _________________________________ BECOME A TANTRIK AT YOUR OWN LEISURE Have you been amazed by the siddhis of tantriks? Precognition, Telepathy, fight the spirits.....This is no "Tomb Raider" - This is for real. Learn how to become a tantrik in 10 easy steps, as easy as A, B, C..... No, not 26 as in alphabets but only 10 steps. Hindu astrology is the most powerful tool in deciding what course of action is suitable for each individual. All you have to do is to send your date, time and place of birth. We will do your horoscope by the most advanced software and give you diksha in a mantra for attaining tantrik powers (siddhis) based on your horoscope. You will be given a PERSONALIZED diksha by a powerful tantrik, HH Dubagooraanandha. HH Dubagooraanandha spent 32 years in Himalayas, performing tapas to attain great tantrik powers. He chased away an evil spirit haunting a princess of a Royal family in Europe. He also predicted the fall of Communism in the Soviet Union. He not only predicted, but hastened the event by telepathically modifiying the minds of the leaders of former Soviet Union. No other nation in the World could read the changes in the country as His Holiness had clouded the data gathering abilities of rivals. His Holiness has decided that it is time the World needs an army of people who can wield the tantrik powers and change the mankind. His Holiness will personally chant diksha mantra which will be recorded into a DVD/VHF tape. He will specifically give diksha to the particular initiate who had placed an order. Tantrik in 10 Steps: Step 1. Move your TV so it faces North. Step 2. Position yourself so you sit facing East. Step 3. Switch on your TV and Video/DVD player. Step 4. Insert the DVD/Tape. Step 5. Press Play button. Step 6. Watch and Listen intently. Step 7. His Holiness will look at you and the camera will zoom in on his lips, at that point, close your eyes and face east. (This you will do naturally as his teeth are rotten. He had not brushed his teeth in 32 years) Step 8. Listen with rapt attention (more intense than Step 6). Step 9. Recite the mantra 9 times in your mind. Step 10. Do a pranaam. After this, all you have to do is to chant the specific mantra 108 times daily for 40 days continously, in SECRECY. If you are a "GOLD" tantrik, you have to chant it for only 20 days. If you are a "Platinum" tantrik you can chant for only 7 days. This is not a gimmick. "Gold" and "Platinum" customers are by selection only. They are given those ratings based on the postion of the planets in their horoscopes. To become a "Gold" or "Platinum" tantrik, please see our special, enhanced initiation rates. [ ;-) ] Secrecy is very important. The mantra is very powerful. If you reveal even the diksha to others, it will invite jealousy which will negatively affect your tapas at the intial stages. Once you have become a full fledged tantrik after doing tapas for 40 days (20 days for "Gold" tantriks and 7 days for "Platinum" tantriks), these negative energies will not affect you. [if you tell someone to keep it a secret, it seldom is, and we can skim more money from other idiots as well] You will see those people will heed your bid and call. You can control their minds. You can see the future. You can see the evil spirits and control them.* * This requires a special diksha available only through further evaluation of spiritual purity through phone interview. Register for a evaluation. You will receive an email/snail mail informing you to call 1800-DUMB ASS for an interview. True Statements from Customers: I being parteeing and chasing gurls in skool. Vith midn kontral tekniks on techurs i get streit A in all my sabjukts - Formerly F minus student. I wanted to date the hunk at the gym. With my tantrik powers I seduced him and now he is my slave - Ugly step sister of Cinderella. My dog was always peeing on the sofa. I changed his behaviour with only 7 days of chanting. Now he pees in the toilet. Puts the seat down after finishing and flushes the toilet as well - Dog lover. I was able to foresee the lotto numbers after only 40 days of chanting. Bought a ticket and won millions of dollars - Lady X, formerly poor, old hag. I saw an evil spirit which was hauting a hollywood actress. It was making her films tank at the box office. I chased it away. Her films are big hits now. She is now my wife - Happy Pool Boy. -- a.. Visit your group "" on the web. b.. c.. -- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 14, 2005 Report Share Posted September 14, 2005 This is hilarious! Did you write it? I love the part where "no other nation in the World could read the changes in the (Soviet Union) as His Holiness had clouded the data gathering abilities of his rivals." Those tantric sadhus... always out to spoil everything for everyone else! On Sep 14, 2005, at 7:04 PM, Mahamuni wrote: > Something to break up all the seriousness around here. Have a good > laugh. > > _________________________________ > > BECOME A TANTRIK AT YOUR OWN LEISURE > > Have you been amazed by the siddhis of tantriks? Precognition, > Telepathy, fight the spirits.....This is no "Tomb Raider" - This is > for real. > > Learn how to become a tantrik in 10 easy steps, as easy as A, B, > C..... No, not 26 as in alphabets but only 10 steps. > > Hindu astrology is the most powerful tool in deciding what course of > action is suitable for each individual. > All you have to do is to send your date, time and place of birth. We > will do your horoscope by the most advanced software and give you > diksha in a mantra for attaining tantrik powers (siddhis) based on > your horoscope. > > You will be given a PERSONALIZED diksha by a powerful tantrik, HH > Dubagooraanandha. HH Dubagooraanandha spent 32 years in Himalayas, > performing tapas to attain great tantrik powers. He chased away an > evil spirit haunting a princess of a Royal family in Europe. He also > predicted the fall of Communism in the Soviet Union. He not only > predicted, but hastened the event by telepathically modifiying the > minds of the leaders of former Soviet Union. No other nation in the > World could read the changes in the country as His Holiness had > clouded the data gathering abilities of rivals. > > His Holiness has decided that it is time the World needs an army of > people who can wield the tantrik powers and change the mankind. > > His Holiness will personally chant diksha mantra which will be > recorded into a DVD/VHF tape. He will specifically give diksha to > the particular initiate who had placed an order. > > Tantrik in 10 Steps: > > Step 1. Move your TV so it faces North. > Step 2. Position yourself so you sit facing East. > Step 3. Switch on your TV and Video/DVD player. > Step 4. Insert the DVD/Tape. > Step 5. Press Play button. > Step 6. Watch and Listen intently. > Step 7. His Holiness will look at you and the camera will zoom in on > his lips, at that point, close your eyes and face east. (This you > will do naturally as his teeth are rotten. He had not brushed his > teeth in 32 years) > Step 8. Listen with rapt attention (more intense than Step 6). > Step 9. Recite the mantra 9 times in your mind. > Step 10. Do a pranaam. > > After this, all you have to do is to chant the specific mantra 108 > times daily for 40 days continously, in SECRECY. If you are a "GOLD" > tantrik, you have to chant it for only 20 days. If you are > a "Platinum" tantrik you can chant for only 7 days. > > This is not a gimmick. "Gold" and "Platinum" customers are by > selection only. They are given those ratings based on the postion of > the planets in their horoscopes. To become a "Gold" or "Platinum" > tantrik, please see our special, enhanced initiation rates. [ ;-) ] > > Secrecy is very important. The mantra is very powerful. If you > reveal even the diksha to others, it will invite jealousy which will > negatively affect your tapas at the intial stages. Once you have > become a full fledged tantrik after doing tapas for 40 days (20 days > for "Gold" tantriks and 7 days for "Platinum" tantriks), these > negative energies will not affect you. [if you tell someone to keep > it a secret, it seldom is, and we can skim more money from other > idiots as well] > > You will see those people will heed your bid and call. You can > control their minds. You can see the future. You can see the evil > spirits and control them.* > > * This requires a special diksha available only through further > evaluation of spiritual purity through phone interview. Register for > a evaluation. You will receive an email/snail mail informing you to > call 1800-DUMB ASS for an interview. > > True Statements from Customers: > > I being parteeing and chasing gurls in skool. Vith midn kontral > tekniks on techurs i get streit A in all my sabjukts - Formerly F > minus student. > > I wanted to date the hunk at the gym. With my tantrik powers I > seduced him and now he is my slave - Ugly step sister of Cinderella. > > My dog was always peeing on the sofa. I changed his behaviour with > only 7 days of chanting. Now he pees in the toilet. Puts the seat > down after finishing and flushes the toilet as well - Dog lover. > > I was able to foresee the lotto numbers after only 40 days of > chanting. Bought a ticket and won millions of dollars - Lady X, > formerly poor, old hag. > > I saw an evil spirit which was hauting a hollywood actress. It was > making her films tank at the box office. I chased it away. Her films > are big hits now. She is now my wife - Happy Pool Boy. > > > > ----- > --------- > > > >  a.. Visit your group "" on the web. >    >  b.. >   >    >  c.. Terms of > Service. > > > > ----- > --------- > > > > > > > > Aum Amriteswarayai Namaha! > > > > > > > Hinduism religion > Different religions beliefs > Mata amritanandamayi > > > > > > ▪  Visit your group "Ammachi" on the web. >  > ▪  >  Ammachi >  > ▪  Terms of > Service. > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 14, 2005 Report Share Posted September 14, 2005 ha ha ha ha ha thanks that was hilarious... Mahamuni <mahamuni wrote: Something to break up all the seriousness around here. Have a good laugh. _________________________________ BECOME A TANTRIK AT YOUR OWN LEISURE Have you been amazed by the siddhis of tantriks? Precognition, Telepathy, fight the spirits.....This is no "Tomb Raider" - This is for real. Learn how to become a tantrik in 10 easy steps, as easy as A, B, C..... No, not 26 as in alphabets but only 10 steps. Hindu astrology is the most powerful tool in deciding what course of action is suitable for each individual. All you have to do is to send your date, time and place of birth. We will do your horoscope by the most advanced software and give you diksha in a mantra for attaining tantrik powers (siddhis) based on your horoscope. You will be given a PERSONALIZED diksha by a powerful tantrik, HH Dubagooraanandha. HH Dubagooraanandha spent 32 years in Himalayas, performing tapas to attain great tantrik powers. He chased away an evil spirit haunting a princess of a Royal family in Europe. He also predicted the fall of Communism in the Soviet Union. He not only predicted, but hastened the event by telepathically modifiying the minds of the leaders of former Soviet Union. No other nation in the World could read the changes in the country as His Holiness had clouded the data gathering abilities of rivals. His Holiness has decided that it is time the World needs an army of people who can wield the tantrik powers and change the mankind. His Holiness will personally chant diksha mantra which will be recorded into a DVD/VHF tape. He will specifically give diksha to the particular initiate who had placed an order. Tantrik in 10 Steps: Step 1. Move your TV so it faces North. Step 2. Position yourself so you sit facing East. Step 3. Switch on your TV and Video/DVD player. Step 4. Insert the DVD/Tape. Step 5. Press Play button. Step 6. Watch and Listen intently. Step 7. His Holiness will look at you and the camera will zoom in on his lips, at that point, close your eyes and face east. (This you will do naturally as his teeth are rotten. He had not brushed his teeth in 32 years) Step 8. Listen with rapt attention (more intense than Step 6). Step 9. Recite the mantra 9 times in your mind. Step 10. Do a pranaam. After this, all you have to do is to chant the specific mantra 108 times daily for 40 days continously, in SECRECY. If you are a "GOLD" tantrik, you have to chant it for only 20 days. If you are a "Platinum" tantrik you can chant for only 7 days. This is not a gimmick. "Gold" and "Platinum" customers are by selection only. They are given those ratings based on the postion of the planets in their horoscopes. To become a "Gold" or "Platinum" tantrik, please see our special, enhanced initiation rates. [ ;-) ] Secrecy is very important. The mantra is very powerful. If you reveal even the diksha to others, it will invite jealousy which will negatively affect your tapas at the intial stages. Once you have become a full fledged tantrik after doing tapas for 40 days (20 days for "Gold" tantriks and 7 days for "Platinum" tantriks), these negative energies will not affect you. [if you tell someone to keep it a secret, it seldom is, and we can skim more money from other idiots as well] You will see those people will heed your bid and call. You can control their minds. You can see the future. You can see the evil spirits and control them.* * This requires a special diksha available only through further evaluation of spiritual purity through phone interview. Register for a evaluation. You will receive an email/snail mail informing you to call 1800-DUMB ASS for an interview. True Statements from Customers: I being parteeing and chasing gurls in skool. Vith midn kontral tekniks on techurs i get streit A in all my sabjukts - Formerly F minus student. I wanted to date the hunk at the gym. With my tantrik powers I seduced him and now he is my slave - Ugly step sister of Cinderella. My dog was always peeing on the sofa. I changed his behaviour with only 7 days of chanting. Now he pees in the toilet. Puts the seat down after finishing and flushes the toilet as well - Dog lover. I was able to foresee the lotto numbers after only 40 days of chanting. Bought a ticket and won millions of dollars - Lady X, formerly poor, old hag. I saw an evil spirit which was hauting a hollywood actress. It was making her films tank at the box office. I chased it away. Her films are big hits now. She is now my wife - Happy Pool Boy. -- a.. Visit your group "" on the web. b.. c.. -- Aum Amriteswarayai Namaha! Hinduism religion Different religions beliefs Mata amritanandamayi Visit your group "Ammachi" on the web. Ammachi for Good Click here to donate to the Hurricane Katrina relief effort. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 14, 2005 Report Share Posted September 14, 2005 THANK YOU FOR THE FUNNY MATERIAL. THIS IS SATIRE AT ITS BEST. I SALUTE THE AUTHOR. WITH A GRIN, GEORGESON Ammachi, balakrishnan Shankar <balakrishnan_sh> wrote: > ha ha ha ha ha > > thanks > > that was hilarious... > > > Mahamuni <mahamuni@c...> wrote: > Something to break up all the seriousness around here. Have a good laugh. > > _________________________________ > > BECOME A TANTRIK AT YOUR OWN LEISURE > > Have you been amazed by the siddhis of tantriks? Precognition, > Telepathy, fight the spirits.....This is no "Tomb Raider" - This is > for real. > > Learn how to become a tantrik in 10 easy steps, as easy as A, B, > C..... No, not 26 as in alphabets but only 10 steps. > > Hindu astrology is the most powerful tool in deciding what course of > action is suitable for each individual. > All you have to do is to send your date, time and place of birth. We > will do your horoscope by the most advanced software and give you > diksha in a mantra for attaining tantrik powers (siddhis) based on > your horoscope. > > You will be given a PERSONALIZED diksha by a powerful tantrik, HH > Dubagooraanandha. HH Dubagooraanandha spent 32 years in Himalayas, > performing tapas to attain great tantrik powers. He chased away an > evil spirit haunting a princess of a Royal family in Europe. He also > predicted the fall of Communism in the Soviet Union. He not only > predicted, but hastened the event by telepathically modifiying the > minds of the leaders of former Soviet Union. No other nation in the > World could read the changes in the country as His Holiness had > clouded the data gathering abilities of rivals. > > His Holiness has decided that it is time the World needs an army of > people who can wield the tantrik powers and change the mankind. > > His Holiness will personally chant diksha mantra which will be > recorded into a DVD/VHF tape. He will specifically give diksha to > the particular initiate who had placed an order. > > Tantrik in 10 Steps: > > Step 1. Move your TV so it faces North. > Step 2. Position yourself so you sit facing East. > Step 3. Switch on your TV and Video/DVD player. > Step 4. Insert the DVD/Tape. > Step 5. Press Play button. > Step 6. Watch and Listen intently. > Step 7. His Holiness will look at you and the camera will zoom in on > his lips, at that point, close your eyes and face east. (This you > will do naturally as his teeth are rotten. He had not brushed his > teeth in 32 years) > Step 8. Listen with rapt attention (more intense than Step 6). > Step 9. Recite the mantra 9 times in your mind. > Step 10. Do a pranaam. > > After this, all you have to do is to chant the specific mantra 108 > times daily for 40 days continously, in SECRECY. If you are a "GOLD" > tantrik, you have to chant it for only 20 days. If you are > a "Platinum" tantrik you can chant for only 7 days. > > This is not a gimmick. "Gold" and "Platinum" customers are by > selection only. They are given those ratings based on the postion of > the planets in their horoscopes. To become a "Gold" or "Platinum" > tantrik, please see our special, enhanced initiation rates. [ ;-) ] > > Secrecy is very important. The mantra is very powerful. If you > reveal even the diksha to others, it will invite jealousy which will > negatively affect your tapas at the intial stages. Once you have > become a full fledged tantrik after doing tapas for 40 days (20 days > for "Gold" tantriks and 7 days for "Platinum" tantriks), these > negative energies will not affect you. [if you tell someone to keep > it a secret, it seldom is, and we can skim more money from other > idiots as well] > > You will see those people will heed your bid and call. You can > control their minds. You can see the future. You can see the evil > spirits and control them.* > > * This requires a special diksha available only through further > evaluation of spiritual purity through phone interview. Register for > a evaluation. You will receive an email/snail mail informing you to > call 1800-DUMB ASS for an interview. > > True Statements from Customers: > > I being parteeing and chasing gurls in skool. Vith midn kontral > tekniks on techurs i get streit A in all my sabjukts - Formerly F > minus student. > > I wanted to date the hunk at the gym. With my tantrik powers I > seduced him and now he is my slave - Ugly step sister of Cinderella. > > My dog was always peeing on the sofa. I changed his behaviour with > only 7 days of chanting. Now he pees in the toilet. Puts the seat > down after finishing and flushes the toilet as well - Dog lover. > > I was able to foresee the lotto numbers after only 40 days of > chanting. Bought a ticket and won millions of dollars - Lady X, > formerly poor, old hag. > > I saw an evil spirit which was hauting a hollywood actress. It was > making her films tank at the box office. I chased it away. Her films > are big hits now. She is now my wife - Happy Pool Boy. > > > -- ------------ > > > > a.. Visit your group "" on the web. > > b.. > > > c.. Terms of Service. > > > -- ------------ > > > > > > > > Aum Amriteswarayai Namaha! > > > > > Hinduism religion Different religions beliefs Mata amritanandamayi > > > > > > Visit your group "Ammachi" on the web. > > > Ammachi > > Terms of Service. > > > > > > > > > for Good > Click here to donate to the Hurricane Katrina relief effort. > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 14, 2005 Report Share Posted September 14, 2005 Oh man this was hilarious, LOL. I nearly woke my son, I was laughing so hard **smiles**. ¸... ´¨¨)) -:¦:- ¸..´ ..´¨¨)) ((¸¸..´ ...´ -:¦:- ..::Brightest Blessings::.. -:¦:- ((¸¸..´.¸...` ..::Bela::.. - Mahamuni Ammachi ; ammachi_free_speech_zone Wednesday, September 14, 2005 10:04 PM Fw: Become a Tantrik - A Mail order Course :-) Something to break up all the seriousness around here. Have a good laugh. _________________________________ BECOME A TANTRIK AT YOUR OWN LEISURE <snipped> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 15, 2005 Report Share Posted September 15, 2005 No, I didn't write it. Got it from another group I"m involved in. - Ardis Jackson Ammachi Wednesday, September 14, 2005 7:41 PM Re: Fw: Become a Tantrik - A Mail order Course :-) This is hilarious! Did you write it? I love the part where "no other nation in the World could read the changes in the (Soviet Union) as His Holiness had clouded the data gathering abilities of his rivals." Those tantric sadhus... always out to spoil everything for everyone else! On Sep 14, 2005, at 7:04 PM, Mahamuni wrote: > Something to break up all the seriousness around here. Have a good > laugh. > > _________________________________ > > BECOME A TANTRIK AT YOUR OWN LEISURE > > Have you been amazed by the siddhis of tantriks? Precognition, > Telepathy, fight the spirits.....This is no "Tomb Raider" - This is > for real. > > Learn how to become a tantrik in 10 easy steps, as easy as A, B, > C..... No, not 26 as in alphabets but only 10 steps. > > Hindu astrology is the most powerful tool in deciding what course of > action is suitable for each individual. > All you have to do is to send your date, time and place of birth. We > will do your horoscope by the most advanced software and give you > diksha in a mantra for attaining tantrik powers (siddhis) based on > your horoscope. > > You will be given a PERSONALIZED diksha by a powerful tantrik, HH > Dubagooraanandha. HH Dubagooraanandha spent 32 years in Himalayas, > performing tapas to attain great tantrik powers. He chased away an > evil spirit haunting a princess of a Royal family in Europe. He also > predicted the fall of Communism in the Soviet Union. He not only > predicted, but hastened the event by telepathically modifiying the > minds of the leaders of former Soviet Union. No other nation in the > World could read the changes in the country as His Holiness had > clouded the data gathering abilities of rivals. > > His Holiness has decided that it is time the World needs an army of > people who can wield the tantrik powers and change the mankind. > > His Holiness will personally chant diksha mantra which will be > recorded into a DVD/VHF tape. He will specifically give diksha to > the particular initiate who had placed an order. > > Tantrik in 10 Steps: > > Step 1. Move your TV so it faces North. > Step 2. Position yourself so you sit facing East. > Step 3. Switch on your TV and Video/DVD player. > Step 4. Insert the DVD/Tape. > Step 5. Press Play button. > Step 6. Watch and Listen intently. > Step 7. His Holiness will look at you and the camera will zoom in on > his lips, at that point, close your eyes and face east. (This you > will do naturally as his teeth are rotten. He had not brushed his > teeth in 32 years) > Step 8. Listen with rapt attention (more intense than Step 6). > Step 9. Recite the mantra 9 times in your mind. > Step 10. Do a pranaam. > > After this, all you have to do is to chant the specific mantra 108 > times daily for 40 days continously, in SECRECY. If you are a "GOLD" > tantrik, you have to chant it for only 20 days. If you are > a "Platinum" tantrik you can chant for only 7 days. > > This is not a gimmick. "Gold" and "Platinum" customers are by > selection only. They are given those ratings based on the postion of > the planets in their horoscopes. To become a "Gold" or "Platinum" > tantrik, please see our special, enhanced initiation rates. [ ;-) ] > > Secrecy is very important. The mantra is very powerful. If you > reveal even the diksha to others, it will invite jealousy which will > negatively affect your tapas at the intial stages. Once you have > become a full fledged tantrik after doing tapas for 40 days (20 days > for "Gold" tantriks and 7 days for "Platinum" tantriks), these > negative energies will not affect you. [if you tell someone to keep > it a secret, it seldom is, and we can skim more money from other > idiots as well] > > You will see those people will heed your bid and call. You can > control their minds. You can see the future. You can see the evil > spirits and control them.* > > * This requires a special diksha available only through further > evaluation of spiritual purity through phone interview. Register for > a evaluation. You will receive an email/snail mail informing you to > call 1800-DUMB ASS for an interview. > > True Statements from Customers: > > I being parteeing and chasing gurls in skool. Vith midn kontral > tekniks on techurs i get streit A in all my sabjukts - Formerly F > minus student. > > I wanted to date the hunk at the gym. With my tantrik powers I > seduced him and now he is my slave - Ugly step sister of Cinderella. > > My dog was always peeing on the sofa. I changed his behaviour with > only 7 days of chanting. Now he pees in the toilet. Puts the seat > down after finishing and flushes the toilet as well - Dog lover. > > I was able to foresee the lotto numbers after only 40 days of > chanting. Bought a ticket and won millions of dollars - Lady X, > formerly poor, old hag. > > I saw an evil spirit which was hauting a hollywood actress. It was > making her films tank at the box office. I chased it away. Her films > are big hits now. She is now my wife - Happy Pool Boy. > > > > > > > > > > > ----- > --------- > > > > a.. Visit your group "" on the web. > > b.. > > > c.. Terms of > Service. > > > > ----- > --------- > > > > > > > > Aum Amriteswarayai Namaha! > > > > > > > Hinduism religion > Different religions beliefs > Mata amritanandamayi > > > > > > â–ª Visit your group "Ammachi" on the web. > > â–ª > Ammachi > > â–ª Terms of > Service. > > > > Aum Amriteswarayai Namaha! a.. Visit your group "Ammachi" on the web. b.. Ammachi c.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 15, 2005 Report Share Posted September 15, 2005 Glad I could make you and others laugh. I loved the part about him not brushing his teeth for 32 years. - Bela Gaytán Ammachi Wednesday, September 14, 2005 8:15 PM Re: Fw: Become a Tantrik - A Mail order Course :-) Oh man this was hilarious, LOL. I nearly woke my son, I was laughing so hard **smiles**. ¸... ´¨¨)) -:¦:- ¸..´ ..´¨¨)) ((¸¸..´ ...´ -:¦:- ..::Brightest Blessings::.. -:¦:- ((¸¸..´.¸...` ..::Bela::.. - Mahamuni Ammachi ; ammachi_free_speech_zone Wednesday, September 14, 2005 10:04 PM Fw: Become a Tantrik - A Mail order Course :-) Something to break up all the seriousness around here. Have a good laugh. _________________________________ BECOME A TANTRIK AT YOUR OWN LEISURE <snipped> Aum Amriteswarayai Namaha! a.. Visit your group "Ammachi" on the web. b.. Ammachi c.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 15, 2005 Report Share Posted September 15, 2005 he he he sitting at my desk laughing. I especially like the testimonials at the end! Thanks Surya. ~angela. Ammachi, "Mahamuni" <mahamuni@c...> wrote: > Something to break up all the seriousness around here. Have a good laugh. > > _________________________________ > > BECOME A TANTRIK AT YOUR OWN LEISURE > > Have you been amazed by the siddhis of tantriks? Precognition, > Telepathy, fight the spirits.....This is no "Tomb Raider" - This is > for real. > > Learn how to become a tantrik in 10 easy steps, as easy as A, B, > C..... No, not 26 as in alphabets but only 10 steps. > > Hindu astrology is the most powerful tool in deciding what course of > action is suitable for each individual. > All you have to do is to send your date, time and place of birth. We > will do your horoscope by the most advanced software and give you > diksha in a mantra for attaining tantrik powers (siddhis) based on > your horoscope. > > You will be given a PERSONALIZED diksha by a powerful tantrik, HH > Dubagooraanandha. HH Dubagooraanandha spent 32 years in Himalayas, > performing tapas to attain great tantrik powers. He chased away an > evil spirit haunting a princess of a Royal family in Europe. He also > predicted the fall of Communism in the Soviet Union. He not only > predicted, but hastened the event by telepathically modifiying the > minds of the leaders of former Soviet Union. No other nation in the > World could read the changes in the country as His Holiness had > clouded the data gathering abilities of rivals. > > His Holiness has decided that it is time the World needs an army of > people who can wield the tantrik powers and change the mankind. > > His Holiness will personally chant diksha mantra which will be > recorded into a DVD/VHF tape. He will specifically give diksha to > the particular initiate who had placed an order. > > Tantrik in 10 Steps: > > Step 1. Move your TV so it faces North. > Step 2. Position yourself so you sit facing East. > Step 3. Switch on your TV and Video/DVD player. > Step 4. Insert the DVD/Tape. > Step 5. Press Play button. > Step 6. Watch and Listen intently. > Step 7. His Holiness will look at you and the camera will zoom in on > his lips, at that point, close your eyes and face east. (This you > will do naturally as his teeth are rotten. He had not brushed his > teeth in 32 years) > Step 8. Listen with rapt attention (more intense than Step 6). > Step 9. Recite the mantra 9 times in your mind. > Step 10. Do a pranaam. > > After this, all you have to do is to chant the specific mantra 108 > times daily for 40 days continously, in SECRECY. If you are a "GOLD" > tantrik, you have to chant it for only 20 days. If you are > a "Platinum" tantrik you can chant for only 7 days. > > This is not a gimmick. "Gold" and "Platinum" customers are by > selection only. They are given those ratings based on the postion of > the planets in their horoscopes. To become a "Gold" or "Platinum" > tantrik, please see our special, enhanced initiation rates. [ ;-) ] > > Secrecy is very important. The mantra is very powerful. If you > reveal even the diksha to others, it will invite jealousy which will > negatively affect your tapas at the intial stages. Once you have > become a full fledged tantrik after doing tapas for 40 days (20 days > for "Gold" tantriks and 7 days for "Platinum" tantriks), these > negative energies will not affect you. [if you tell someone to keep > it a secret, it seldom is, and we can skim more money from other > idiots as well] > > You will see those people will heed your bid and call. You can > control their minds. You can see the future. You can see the evil > spirits and control them.* > > * This requires a special diksha available only through further > evaluation of spiritual purity through phone interview. Register for > a evaluation. You will receive an email/snail mail informing you to > call 1800-DUMB ASS for an interview. > > True Statements from Customers: > > I being parteeing and chasing gurls in skool. Vith midn kontral > tekniks on techurs i get streit A in all my sabjukts - Formerly F > minus student. > > I wanted to date the hunk at the gym. With my tantrik powers I > seduced him and now he is my slave - Ugly step sister of Cinderella. > > My dog was always peeing on the sofa. I changed his behaviour with > only 7 days of chanting. Now he pees in the toilet. Puts the seat > down after finishing and flushes the toilet as well - Dog lover. > > I was able to foresee the lotto numbers after only 40 days of > chanting. Bought a ticket and won millions of dollars - Lady X, > formerly poor, old hag. > > I saw an evil spirit which was hauting a hollywood actress. It was > making her films tank at the box office. I chased it away. Her films > are big hits now. She is now my wife - Happy Pool Boy. > > > -- ------------ > > > > a.. Visit your group "" on the web. > > b.. > > > c.. Terms of Service. > > > -- ------------ > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.