To Bala ~ good to see you again

[Guest guest]

Bala wrote:

 

....My return to her is a joyous one! But it is also a difficult one - I will

 

still deal with depression, financial problems, and the issues with my

health. (Unfortunately it has been deteriorating.) But I know that I can

handle this with Amma in my life, in my heart, and carrying me when I am

weak. There is a huge difference, in my opinion, in suffering alone, and

suffering, yet knowing that you are cared for, you are loved, and that you

do matter, and having the knowledge to realize what's going on, and the

strength to carry the load...

Dear Bala ~ it is good to "see" you again. I relate very much to what you

have written, thought even now as I deal with health problems, family turning

away from me in a time of need, problems with my partner, it has been Amma, and

to some extent, this group, which to me is an extension of Amma, like

tendrils of beautiful flowing light emanating from our Amma/Star. (I still have

this image in my mind that I want to draw or paint, of Mother as a Star with

tendrils of Light that become a rainbow.)

 

It sounds as if you have been through what St. John of the Cross called the

"dark night of the soul," and it often preceeds a return to the Light, to

Oneness, to Divinity within and without. Even in reading "On the Road to

Freedom," by Swami Paramatmananda (okay, I'm almost finished with the first

book),

Swami P. had periods of deep inner doubt and despair. He was also very ill,

but I am just at the part of the book where Amma finally healed him (after

telling him that his illness was burning away some karma).

 

Anyway, dear brother ~ it is good to have you among us again, and I am very

glad those COL letters reached you and lifted up your heart. Hugs ~ Jai Ma ~

Linda