Guest guest Posted August 28, 2005 Report Share Posted August 28, 2005 Sweta wrote: This is one of the similarities from our childhood, that we share. You are right, Amma is the one & only therapist who can REALLY help. She's helped me with a problem stemming from my childhood, about which I cried out to God years ago & could not make even a dent in it. After meeting Amma, it came up around Her like crazy, then She partially re-enacted a traumatic scene right before my eyes, just before one Devi Bhava darshan. Since then, it's noticably lessened, so it's coming under my control. Amma must've then taken something from me ... karma? For me, this is nothing short of a miracle... Dear Sweta ~ you are so right, and this isn't exactly related, but I think it is. I have been stressing out so much over getting ready for this art fair our group is having. I've been very involved, doing the pr, dealing with ad people, helping to coordinate, etc. Yesterday, I had to leave the gallery because I am still detoxing from this medicine I was on. I had to go to bed; I was in so much pain. And I was feeling very angry with my mother again. Then later in the evening, I was basically doing nothing, but I was feeling much more open. I "heard" Amma's voice. She said, "Linda, play with your voice, just play with it, and you will learn how to sing again. Play with your art. Don't worry so much about it being right. Just play, and you will rediscover your art. Play with your spirituality. Have fun. Enjoy it. Just Play." I started crying because this was the best and most significant thing anyone could have said to me. I said, like a petulant child, "How can You say such nice things to me.Because I am your Mother," She said. And I thought, oh! yes! You ARE my mother. And I felt much of my pain and resentment toward my mother drop away. Because I didn't have a normal childhood and was terrified all the time, I have always taken everything very seriously. Everything had to be perfect. I never really learned how to play. When I was in art school, my teachers would invariably say, "just play with it." And I felt like I just couldn't even understand what they were talking about. And now my Mother has spoken, and I understand, for is She not the very model of joy, of playfulness. Yes, She is serious too, but I will never forget the scene in one of the movies where the elephant comes over to the table where She is sitting. She gives him some food. Then he spews water all over everyone. She rolls back in Her chair and just laughs and laughs. I have not seen Mother in years, and yet She knew exactly the right message to send me at exactly the time I needed to hear it. What a dear, beloved Mother. Jai Jai Ma ~ Linda Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 28, 2005 Report Share Posted August 28, 2005 Dearest Sister Linda, Your description of your childhood sounds so much like mine. I also never learned to play. I was afraid so much of the time. I had to be perfect to be accepted at all. "Perfection" was my ticket to avoid being slapped and beaten and locked in a closet. I was very serious about everything I did. I still can't really "do art" or play instruments or speak foreign languages because I am so afraid of making mistakes. I still have issues with my mother. The saving grace of my childhood was my sweet father. When he was home I was safe. He gave unconditional love and taught me many valuable things. I am new to Amma and I haven't really learned to talk to her yet. I want so much to "know" Her. Pahari Maa > Dear Sweta ~ you are so right, and this isn't exactly related, but I > think > it is. I have been stressing out so much over getting ready for this > art fair > our group is having. I've been very involved, doing the pr, dealing > with ad > people, helping to coordinate, etc. Yesterday, I had to leave the > gallery > because I am still detoxing from this medicine I was on. I had to go > to bed; I > was in so much pain. And I was feeling very angry with my mother > again. > > Then later in the evening, I was basically doing nothing, but I was > feeling > much more open. I "heard" Amma's voice. She said, "Linda, play with > your > voice, just play with it, and you will learn how to sing again. Play > with your > art. Don't worry so much about it being right. Just play, and you > will > rediscover your art. Play with your spirituality. Have fun. Enjoy > it. Just Play." I > started crying because this was the best and most significant thing > anyone > could have said to me. I said, like a petulant child, "How can You > say such nice > things to me.Because I am your Mother," She said. And I thought, > oh! yes! > You ARE my mother. And I felt much of my pain and resentment toward > my > mother drop away. > > Because I didn't have a normal childhood and was terrified all the > time, I > have always taken everything very seriously. Everything had to be > perfect. I > never really learned how to play. When I was in art school, my > teachers would > invariably say, "just play with it." And I felt like I just couldn't > even > understand what they were talking about. > > And now my Mother has spoken, and I understand, for is She not the > very > model of joy, of playfulness. Yes, She is serious too, but I will > never forget > the scene in one of the movies where the elephant comes over to the > table where > She is sitting. She gives him some food. Then he spews water all over > everyone. She rolls back in Her chair and just laughs and laughs. > > I have not seen Mother in years, and yet She knew exactly the right > message > to send me at exactly the time I needed to hear it. What a dear, > beloved > Mother. Jai Jai Ma ~ Linda > > > > > > > Aum Amriteswarayai Namaha! > > > > > > > Hinduism religion > Different religions beliefs > Mata amritanandamayi > > > > > > ▪  Visit your group "Ammachi" on the web. >  > ▪  >  Ammachi >  > ▪  Terms of > Service. > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 28, 2005 Report Share Posted August 28, 2005 i can echo that similar childhood, too. maybe there are many of us. Ardis Jackson wrote: >Dearest Sister Linda, > >Your description of your childhood sounds so much like mine. I also >never learned to play. I was afraid so much of the time. I had to be >perfect to be accepted at all. "Perfection" was my ticket to avoid >being slapped and beaten and locked in a closet. I was very serious >about everything I did. I still can't really "do art" or play >instruments or speak foreign languages because I am so afraid of making >mistakes. I still have issues with my mother. > >The saving grace of my childhood was my sweet father. When he was home >I was safe. He gave unconditional love and taught me many valuable >things. > >I am new to Amma and I haven't really learned to talk to her yet. I >want so much to "know" Her. > >Pahari Maa > -- "Naan Amme Snehikkunnu" Be Love, Egyirba (Berijoy) http://www.egyirba.net Let love transform your life. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 29, 2005 Report Share Posted August 29, 2005 Darling Devi's Daughter, Perhaps that is why we turn to God... why we dedicate our lives to God. Pahari Maa On Aug 28, 2005, at 8:54 PM, Devi's Daughter wrote: > i can echo that similar childhood, too. maybe there are many of us. > > Ardis Jackson wrote: > > >Dearest Sister Linda, > > > >Your description of your childhood sounds so much like mine. I also > >never learned to play. I was afraid so much of the time. I had to > be > >perfect to be accepted at all. "Perfection" was my ticket to avoid > >being slapped and beaten and locked in a closet. I was very serious > >about everything I did. I still can't really "do art" or play > >instruments or speak foreign languages because I am so afraid of > making > >mistakes. I still have issues with my mother. > > > >The saving grace of my childhood was my sweet father. When he was > home > >I was safe. He gave unconditional love and taught me many valuable > >things. > > > >I am new to Amma and I haven't really learned to talk to her yet. I > >want so much to "know" Her. > > > >Pahari Maa > > > > -- > "Naan Amme Snehikkunnu"  > > Be Love, > Egyirba (Berijoy) > http://www.egyirba.net > > Let love transform your life. > > > Aum Amriteswarayai Namaha! > > > > > > > Hinduism religion > Different religions beliefs > Mata amritanandamayi > > > > > > ▪  Visit your group "Ammachi" on the web. >  > ▪  >  Ammachi >  > ▪  Terms of > Service. > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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