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OM NAMAH SIVAYA

 

first of all, hi back to you Ardis(west side in the house!). while

i can't speak for others, i, for one, am glad that your post was

posted to the whole group. while i never like to hear of others

suffering, for me it serves as a great reminder that no matter the

hardships one may endure, has endured, is enduring we don't have the

benefit of knowing the whole story. we don't know the purpose of

the experience. and like you said in your post, everything that

happens to us is for a reason, to move along the path towards Home.

there are no coincidences. your story is inspirational in that it

has led you to a better place and even more than that has helped you

towards our goal. one that Amma has reached and is leading us all to.

 

JAI MA

 

Ammachi, Ardis Jackson <ardis1@v...> wrote:

> Excuse me I thought that this long response was going directly to

> Linda's private email. I didn't mean to share it with the entire

> group.

>

> Namaste

>

> Pahari Maa

>

> On Aug 4, 2005, at 1:23 PM, Ardis Jackson wrote:

>

> >

> > > Dear sweet sister Linda,

> >

> > I really felt the "need" to respond to this post.

> > >  Dear Ananthasree ~ me either; what a wonderful story of

Amma's

> > > omniscience. 

> > >  I hope this doesn't start another thread of people writing

back and

> > > forth in 

> > >  support of or in dispute of Amma's omniscience. I have read

too

> > many

> > > stories

> > >  not  to believe in both Her omniscience and omnipresence.

How

> > > wonderful for

> > >  your  partner.

> > The first time I met Swami Satyananda Saraswati he told

me  "at last

> > you have come."  I have never been able to get him to explain

to me

> > when we had been together in the past, but he made it very

clear that

> > we had been.  Another time he was giving a class and he looked

right

> > at

> > me and said "Oh yes, you saw me.  You saw me meditating in a

cave in

> > India and recognized your devotee.  You were Durga then and

you were

> > flying over the Himalayas." Then he bowed to me.

> > >

> > >

> > >  I sometimes feel, Amma is like Glenda, the Good Witch in

the Wizard

> > > of  Oz,

> > >  floating around in Her cosmic bubble with Her magic wand,

sprinking

> > > Divine 

> > >  Love Dust here and there. And no kidding, this recently

came up

> > in  a

> > > pyschic

> > >  reading I had done. A  Glenda-type great soul appeared 

to me in a

> > > cave and did a

> > >  healing on me. She told me I had agreed to come to  this

Earth and

> > > take on

> > >  these difficulties for the benefit of "my people."

> >

> > In the 1950's I saw a copy of  Life Magazine that included an

article

> > about Sikkim and Hope Cooke, the American socialite who married

the

> > Crown Prince of Sikkim. When I saw the pictures of the land,

I "knew"

> > that I had been there.  When I went to Sikkim in 1992, I felt

that the

> > Sikkimese people were "my people". I felt such a oneness with

them. 

> > Much more than I usually feel with Americans.  When I had to

leave, a

> > Sikkimese woman washed my hands with her tears.  She did not

want me

> > to

> > leave.  It was a very powerful moment.  I told her that that

was the

> > only visit "home" that I would make this lifetime.

> > >

> > >  When she left, I was on a grassy hillside with a beautiful

but

> > simple 

> > >  village below. Everyone was rushing to greet me and say how

happy

> > > they were to  see

> > >  me. I spent a little time there, and then I said I had to

go; I

> > > wasn't done.

> > >

> > >  Since then, I have since visited this place again and

spoken with

> > "my 

> > >  people" some more. Now that I know where they are, I told

them, I

> > can

> > > come back  for

> > >  visits. They took me to a beautiful lake on the other side

of the

> > > simple, 

> > >  but beautiful village, and led me to a gorgeous huge lake

with a

> > > white bridge 

> > >  crossing it (no railings). The lake and bridge had not been

there

> > > before, and I

> > >  asked them when they had made it. They said, "We just

decided," and

> > > let me

> > >  see  that just by choosing something, so it is. Two of

them led me

> > to

> > > the

> > >  center of  the bridge, and I could see everything. I was

somewhat

> > > overwhelmed by

> > >  the beauty  of it all. I said, "Oh I wish I could fly."

Without a

> > > word or a

> > >  warning, my  companions pushed me off the bridge and I

took what

> > was

> > > like a long

> > >  flying glide  into the lake. It was wonderful. They

reminded me

> > > before I left,

> > >  "It is always  only a matter of choosing."

> >

> > My father and I were always very close.  I consider him to be

my first

> > guru.  (in this lifetime)  He taught me the value of silence

and

> > simplicity, of peace and unconditional love and service.  In

1968 he

> > had a dream.  In this dream he was told that if he took a

certain trip

> > with my mother to British Columbia and Washington state that

there

> > would be a terrible accident and he would die.  He came to me

and

> > asked

> > me what I thought.  I told him that I thought some dreams were

> > predictions of the future but that some were not.  Only he

could

> > discern the significance of the dream.  He told my mother

about the

> > dream.  She reacted in a very selfish way "oh no, you are not

going to

> > use a stupid dream to get out of this trip!  I have wanted to

take

> > this

> > trip for 40 years. There is NO WAY I will let you cancel this

trip." 

> > In a strange way, both my mother and I "forgot" about the

dream.  My

> > father spent the last six months of his life happier than I had

ever

> > seen him... walking on the beach... sitting under the apple

tree...

> > not

> > letting my volatile (bipolar) mother get to him...no worries. 

Then

> > they went on their trip.  My husband and I also were away on a

trip to

> > the Grand Canyon.  When we got home the first call we got was

from a

> > hospital in Washington saying that there had been a terrible

accident

> > and both of my parents were in critical condition.  My father

passed

> > away the next morning.  I was en route to see him when he

passed.  To

> > this day my mother swears that there was "no dream".  My

father was 61

> > years old.  My mother is now 90 and still in excellent health.

> >

> > A couple of years after my dad died, my husband, baby and I were

> > visiting an acquaintance in Santa Fe.  It turned out that she

was a

> > psychic and performed seances.  She asked us if there was

anyone on

> > the

> > other side that we wanted to contact.  At first we said "no"

but then

> > I

> > thought of my father. I had always had doubts about the way he

left. 

> > Our friend spoke saying "Is there anyone who wishes to speak to

> > Ardis?"

> >   "Is Charles Daniel O'Brien Jackson there?  After a pause,

she said

> > "he

> > is here Ardis, ask your question."  I said "Daddy, why did you

commit

> > suicide?"  She said "He's laughing.  He says ' Is that what

you

> > thought'"?  I said "well you had warning and you still went on

the

> > trip."  He said "I had used up my last extension.  I was

needed here.

> > Couldn't you tell that I was happy to return Home? Oh, Ardie,

it is

> > soooooo beautiful here.  You can't imagine it.  It is so far

beyond

> > any

> > of the beauty on Earth.  I never dreamed that I would be able

to go to

> > such a place."  I started crying and said "Oh Daddy, if you

didn't

> > believe that you would go to such a beautiful place, you were

the only

> > one!  Everyone who knew you knew that you would go to the best

place

> > in

> > creation."  Then my dad said "well Ardie I enjoyed this visit

but I

> > have to get going.  We have lots of work to do here."

> >

> > He came to me once again in 1992 when I was planning my trip to

> > India. 

> > He told me that I was going to be in danger.  If I wished to

do so he

> > would set up a daily appointment with me at 5:30 pm.  I could

ask any

> > questions or share any feelings and he would respond through

automatic

> > writing.  My daily visits with him had a lot to do with

my "surviving"

> > the danger in Nepal.  At age 51, in the midst of a biiss-filled

> > pilgrimage, I was raped by a "high Tibetan rimpoche". My father

> > couldn't warn me specifically of the danger or prevent it, but

his

> > loving presence surrounded me and was more "real" than the

rape.  When

> > I read about your abuse and illness I wish that you had a pure

father

> > to guide you and surround you with love.  But you have Amma and

> > Swamiji.  Amma did not want you to be abused or ill.  She

does not

> > want

> > that for any of her children.  We come in with vasanas.  They

need to

> > be lived through.

> >

> > When I was 18 I told my first formal spiritual teacher that I

wanted

> > to

> > be fully enlightened by the time I was 21 or at the very latest

25. 

> > She got a shocked look on her face.   She knew how very

difficult it

> > would be (if not impossible) to clear all the vasanas in such a

short

> > time.  I certainly set the bar high for myself.  She started

talking

> > about the Golden Years, the time after 50 when all of one's

spiritual

> > work starts to pay off.  She made it sound so beautiful.  She

also

> > said

> > how wonderful it was that I was already on a serious spiritual

path at

> > such a young age.  I am in the Golden Years now and they are

truly

> > beautiful.  I have had lots of suffering in my life ... an

abusive

> > mother... a terrible faithless marriage of 12 yrs... being a

single

> > parent and sole support of my daughter... a lifelong struggle

with

> > mental illness including many hospitalizations.  But it is all

so

> > beautiful now.  It has all been worth it.  As Swamiji

says "if you

> > like

> > where you are now... thank the ancestors... thank all the

teachers...

> > thank all the experiences.  Just be here now. "

> >

> > I know that it may seem easy for me to say.  I do not have your

> > physical situation.  I pray that these difficulties will be

lifted. 

> > Don't ever think that Amma wants you to suffer.  If she did,

She would

> > not be the Avatar that She is.  I wonder if your abuses and

illnesses

> > are because as a very young child you placed the bar very high

for

> > yourself.  My intuition is that you, gorgeous sister, have

always been

> > on the "right" path and have always kept the light in sight.

> >

> > Blessings,

> >

> > Pahari Maa

> > >

> > >  So, first I will remind everyone that this was a visionary

> > > experience, but  I

> > >  do feel it is connected in some way to Amma. I would love

to ask

> > Her

> > > about

> > >  it.  I know there are other planes of existence and beings

living

> > on

> > > other

> > >  planets  (okay, now you all know I am certifiably nuts). I

thought

> > > this experience

> > >  might  be taking place on the astral plane where thoughts

become

> > > reality ever

> > >  so much  more quickly than they do here. Interestingly,

this

> > reading

> > > and

> > >  vision connect  back to a "memory" I had when I was very

little

> > > (around 5 or so).

> > >  I remembered a place, beautiful and simple, with green

grass and

> > > trees, 

> > >  fountains spraying water into the air, and the most loving

beings

> > > walking around 

> > >  conversing. I remember something about 7 levels ... and

that is

> > all I 

> > >  remember.

> > >

> > >  If it is Amma's will that I grew up abused and that I now

struggle

> > > daily 

> > >  with this illness, for the sake of any others, then I

gladly offer

> > it

> > > to Her 

> > >  Lotus Feet. Amma, Amma, Amma, Ma, Ma, Ma ~ Linda

> > >

> > >

> > > 

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > > Aum Amriteswarayai Namaha!

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >       ▪        Visit your group "Ammachi" on the

web.

> > >  

> > >       ▪        To from this group,

send an email to:

> > >  Ammachi

> > >  

> > >       ▪        Your use of is

subject to the

> > Terms of

> > > Service.

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > > 

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> > Aum Amriteswarayai Namaha!

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> > ▪  Visit your group "Ammachi" on the web.

> >  

> > ▪  

> >  Ammachi

> >  

> > ▪  

Terms of

> > Service.

> >

> >

> >

> >

>

>

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i second that, ecjensen! she always has the best stories!

 

 

ecjensen_us wrote:

 

>OM NAMAH SIVAYA

>

>first of all, hi back to you Ardis(west side in the house!). while

>i can't speak for others, i, for one, am glad that your post was

>posted to the whole group. while i never like to hear of others

>suffering, for me it serves as a great reminder that no matter the

>hardships one may endure, has endured, is enduring we don't have the

>benefit of knowing the whole story. we don't know the purpose of

>the experience. and like you said in your post, everything that

>happens to us is for a reason, to move along the path towards Home.

>there are no coincidences. your story is inspirational in that it

>has led you to a better place and even more than that has helped you

>towards our goal. one that Amma has reached and is leading us all to.

>

>JAI MA

>

 

--

"Naan Amme Snehikkunnu"

 

Be Love,

Egyirba (Berijoy)

http://www.egyirba.net

 

The Lord of Love is before and behind. He extends to the right and to

the left. He extends above; he extends below. There is no one here but

the Lord of Love.

He alone is; in truth, he alone is.-Mundaka Upanishad Excerpted from The

Upanishads, translated by Eknath Easwaran, copyright 1987.

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