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Namaste Everyone,

 

 

I am sorry it has taken so long to tell you how our Christmas was. It seems

that I have less and less time on my computer these past weeks and even months.

In any case the girls had a very blessed Christmas. They were very happy about

all of the things they received, which I might add you all spoiled them! I would

like to tell everyone a big THANK YOU for everyone's donations and prayers.

Things are going well these days. I am starting to receive checks from the state

now. Hopefully this will pull me up out of the water. I don't think I have ever

been so stressed and worried than I was a couple of months ago. It was VERY

scary to have two girls depending on you and you not knowing which way things

were going to go. I was humbled by the experience to say the least. And only

survived by Amma's Angels. :-)

 

I have been a little blue since the tsunami hit. At first I was like "oh wow

a big title wave hit somewhere"...then I started to hear the whereabouts a few

days later and it started to dawn on me that Amma might be affected by this.

Then I heard HOW much was affected a few more days later and was just FLOORED

that this happened. I saw a picture of Amma never looking more sad. It brought

me to tears, reflections of peoples sorrows in her face. I still cry now

thinking of it. So many people. I hear stories here and there. Stories of a

woman who had two of her children and went under the water so she had to make a

choice to let one go or they would all die. I thought about my girls and about

if I had to choose. It brought me to tears for this woman's sorrows. Luckily

another women grabbed the older boy but lost him seconds later. Somehow this boy

clung to a tree for two days and survived. Another story was of a woman who was

having breakfast with her husband and two children and when

the tsunami hit they grabbed them but couldn't hang on to them. She ended up

loosing her children. It pains me to think of the grief these people are feeling

over there. That they have lost everything, including there loved ones. At first

I couldn't pray to Amma I felt that she was "too busy" to hear my prayers or

that I didn't want to bother her. I realize that she is infinite and that it

doesn't work this way but my mind was trying to "rationalize". All I could do

was pray for the people who were affected, I could not say personal prayers for

myself or family. I still pray for them. I could never have enough strength to

go through something like this. I wish that I could do something hands on to

help. At the time I felt guilt for having a nice Christmas holiday while this

colossal catastrophe happened. Right now I just feel lucky that it didn't happen

to me. Lucky that I have my family, my home, and my job.

 

I do not pretend to know how Amma operates. At first it stuck an interest to

here stories of this or that when the tsunami hit, but nothing more. What was

her reaction? Why didn't she see this? How could this happen? The best reasoning

I could come up with is that this was meant to happen, it was inevitable. It was

the karma of the world. Cause and effect. If God intervened with all natural or

unnatural catastrophes then there would be none. I do know that most of us that

know Amma have had one or more personal experiences to know that she is more

real than the air we breathe. She has touched us in ways that are unexplainable.

And some things just don't need to be explained. They just are.

 

 

Amma dragging me by the hand. :-)

Robin

 

 

PS. There is so much I would love to wright I just don't have the time. I will

try to write soon. I will also send some picture of the girls at Christmas when

I get them developed. It will be a little while on that.

 

 

 

 

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