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Digest Number 1285

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Hello brothers and sisters,

 

I am wishing someone would say "Supriti where are you, we haven't heard from you

in so long?"

 

I have been catching up after being in a funk. Wishing the world would go away

so I can just be with Mother and not have to work on my vasanas and fears.

 

Anyway, I am here, some wonderful gains and some serious setbacks. One funny

thing happened this Saturday (26th Sep). We were having the monthly Satya

Narayana Puja at the ashram and I got up to help someone and I was returning to

my seat and my punjabi's suddenly fell down around my ankles and I had to hop

out of the room, right in the middle of the puja. I wanted to lay on the floor

and laugh out loud, but I couldn't because we were doing the puja. I had to

snort quietly and pull my pants up and go back to the puja - many shades of red

and trying not to laugh. Then later in the satsang that evening, I was ringing

the bell during Arati and those stupid pants fell down again. It just wasn't my

day. LOL Funny the things Amma does to make us humble... :)

 

Noticed some notes about fearing meditation and appreciate those comments. I

reada post about a childhood experience that when it was quiet it was because

there was punishment coming. I too had that experience, having to wait for the

man to come with the belt, sitting on a bed waiting for what seemed like hours,

listening intently for hours for the door to open, and the beating to begin.

Thanks for that story because now I can erase that video/tape and put something

good in there.

 

The recent victory for me has been with food. I am finally able to eat what I

need and not eat what I want as much as I want when I want. I have been losing

weight and my big fear around that was that "if I lose weight I will get sick" -

so I am having a bear of a cold for two weeks now, and yet the urge to binge and

eat what I want when I want as much as I want has not returned. I am sure that

the toxins I had stored in the fat I am losing are being released and I am not

afraid of this anymore. YAY. What a great feeling it is to not be addicted to

food and the comfort of food. I feel really happy and peaceful about food now.

And the bigger truth is that I have all the comfort I need because I am Amma's

girl, Amma loves me, I love Amma, I have what I need and so much more. What a

relief. For the first time in this life, I am free of that addiction and also

sober for over 6 years now. I still have a problem with chocolate, I will work

on that later... :)

 

I moved back to my own apartment last week, alone again, just me and Amma - I

don't feel lonely or afraid of loneliness. Peaceful here.

 

Robin, love you, miss you, coming in November?

 

Sitting amongst my detritus here in Michigan waiting for the snow to come.

 

By the way, the ashram in Michigan is open at 545am every weekday and 7am on the

weekends for the 108/1000 names chants to pray for peace. Stop by if you are in

the neighborhood.

 

Amma will be here soon!!!!!

 

Jai Ma!

 

 

 

 

Om Namashivaya - In Amma's service,

 

Supriti Omenka Nnadi

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Hi Supriti.

I was definitely missing you!

What a great report you send.

So inspiring!

Looking forward to serving Amma with you in Nov.

in Her Amazing grace,

premarupa

Aum Amriteshvaryai Namah

>

 

 

 

 

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