Arranged Marriages Are Popular Among Hindu and Muslim Youth in America

December 2, 2002

.. Arranged Marriages are Popular Among Hindu and Muslim Youth in America

Source: Associated Press

MIAMI, U.S.A., November 16, 2002: Many Hindus and Muslims growing up in

America are following in the footsteps of their parents by having their

marriages arranged. For example, one young couple, Mala Shay Kher who grew

up in Florida and Prashant Kaul who grew up in London, were engaged in

August and plan to marry in January. Parents on both sides knew each other

back in India and asked the couple to consider marriage in 1998. Kher, a

University of Miami medical student says, " We never would have met if our

families didn't arrange our marriage. There was no pressure like we had to

do it. It's like a friend setting you up on a blind date, except it's your

parents. In America and Europe, people have a negative connotation of

arranged marriage." Christine Gudorf, a religious studies professor at

Florida International University says, "In Muslim countries and India,

education has changed the way marriage works. In the past, girls were

married at 12 or 13 and not mature enough to make choices. Forced marriages

at young ages still occur, but they're rare for the middle and upper-classes

that immigrate to the United States." Both Muslim and Hindu families, who

frown on dating, network among friends and relatives to find a potential

suitable mate for their children. Minal Ahson, a 19-year-old Muslim girl,

says, "Avoiding dating helped me concentrate on my schoolwork. One reason

why parents are involved in marriage is because you tend to get stars in

your eyes when you fall in love. You might overlook bad qualities of the

person." Loretta Ross, executive director of National Center for Human

Rights Education in Atlanta says, "Young immigrant women are vulnerable to

being coerced into marriage. People you love can pressure you to do a lot of

things, especially family members." Saba Khan, a 19-year-old Muslim girl who

attends the University of Miami adds, "My parents plan to give me the final

say on anyone they recommend to me," and blames the media for the

misconceptions. "It's rare that people are forced into marriages. A happy

family just isn't news."

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