Know Who You Are !

August 2, 2002

Know Who You Are !

It was in 1919 that I first came to Sri Bhagavan. He was then living at

Skandasramam on the slope of the Hill Arunachala. His mother and brother lived

with him. Palaniswami used to attend to his few personal wants. Plague had

driven away most of the inhabitants of the town and consequently visitors to Sri

Bhagavan were few. I was, therefore, left alone with Sri Bhagavan most of the

time. I related to him all the spiritual practices I had been doing, what I had

been studying, and what experiences I had. At that time I was very unhappy

because in spite of all I had done I was unable to experience samadhi. After

patiently hearing me out, Bhagavan quoted from Kaivalya Navaneet

"If you realize who you are, there is no cause for sorrow."

"So if you come to understand who you are, then there is peace," said Bhagavan.

Well, I did not know what was meant by "know who you are." Bhagavan went on to

explain that the mind is only a bundle of thoughts and that if I seek the source

of all thoughts I would be drawn into the Heart. He simultaneously pointed to

his Heart. Bhagavan was looking at me intently and I focused my attention in the

manner he instructed me and within a few minutes I was led into samadhi. I was

thrilled. Coming to my senses we went for lunch. Then again, I sat before him

and by a single look he put me into that blissful state. This experience

occurred again and again-during all seventeen days that I stayed with Bhagavan.

I was like one intoxicated. I was absolutely indifferent to everything. I had no

curiosity to see anything, no desire whatsoever. What I did I did most

mechanically. I would have continued to live in this state if it had not

occurred to me that it was not proper to partake of the food that was offered to

Sri Bhagavan by his devotees without paying anything.

I thought that he had initiated me into the experience of Brahman and that I had

nothing more to gain by staying in his presence. I, therefore, returned to my

native place and began to practise meditation in a room in my house all by

myself. I could succeed to gain and retain that experience only for a few days;

it started to diminish gradually and at last one day it was lost. I could not

regain the experience. I decided to return to Sri Bhagavan. This I did, and

great good fortune awaited me when I came.

Kunju Swami

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