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Hypocrisy

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Sincerity is one of the main characteristic of a Vaishnava.

Sometimes we are scared to say the truth because a devotee could be offended. And we lost time and time talking and talking to try to make the devotee understand what we want to say. Loss of time and effort.

I think that to say the truth right away is right for a devotee, I can be rough but it solves problem right away. If a devotee is offended is a problem of his mind and ego.

An offence is intended to be someting direct and malicious. Sometimes we speak to the back of a devotee to avoid the "offence" of saying it in face, but to speak on the back is an offence. Srila Prabhupada teached us to be pragmatic and direct.

What do you think?

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Recently I have had this problem. I am not a very much practicing devotee, but I am trying to associate with devotees and to chant. There is one devotee lady who lives in my town. I have been associating with her for several years. Our relationship was very good and we have had a lot of great vaishnava association. I remain thankful to her for that until the end of my days. However, later I became irritated, because of what I thought was her too intensive preaching towards me. Of course, this was my materialistic mind who caused the whole problem. But I tried to be nice with her and not show this irritation. I tried to control my mind and suppress this irritation. But sometimes it would come to surface and I feel angry again. But I still tried not to show it to her. I struggled with myself. Struggled with my mind and ego. So, was that hypocrcy? I tried to control myself. It was sincere. I did not hide the irritation, but I tried to get rid of it, because I realized it was bad. However, the day came when this irritation became stronger than me and I revealed it to her. She became very upset. She thought that I had been hypocritical all the time. And I had offended the devotee of the Lord - this was a serious aparadha! Later I appologzed her and tried to do some service to her to redeem my fault against her. But the most terrible thing for me was that she thought that I was a hypocrite! She said: "I would never tolerate hypocricy". Now I am trying to be nice with her and try to work with my mind so that I do not get angry or irritated again. So in conclusion I can say that I feel we should be open and sincere with the other devotees, but when we become angry and irritated (for whatever reason), then we better be not open, because we let out our anger or irritation and this will hurt the other person and after that will hurt ourselves too. This is Vaishnava aparadha and we will have serious reactions for that. Therefore I feel we must be open and tell the truth, but only when we are well disposed towards that other person and want to help him, not when we want to find fault with him.

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Hare Krishna

 

You should have expressed your irritation earlier,

Vaisnavas have feeling too! They are not robots!

She would have understood that you needed a little

time to contemplate whatever, be truthful, and tactful,

in your dealings, that is my view. Hare krishna

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yes! devotes are not robots. but sometime they act like. not considering the PERSONAL interests, the PERSONAL background etc. Mayavadi thoughts are easy to spread trough and are our swore enemy.

returnig to the topic. the problem is that if you say the things right the way your "false ego" is controlling you if you don't say you are hypocrit. No middle way. We have to tollerate and don't think that our experiece is the same and applicable for everyone.

Haribol.

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