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arjun2826

mixed union and religion

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Here is a wellknown topic, but still I canno't get one and definitive answer.

So I will tell you my story :

It is the story of an indian origin guy living abroad and who fall in love with a white catholic girl. His parent refuse absolutely this union because :

- it will bring shame, unhappiness on his indian indian family living abroad too

- their son won't be able to "put fire" on the funeral of his parent (because he is married to a catholic girl, and is no more "pure")

- they worship Ganesh Chaturti in India in the house of the grandparent. Their son is ok to worship Ganesh abroad, in the place where he lives. But according to his parents, he cannot do it outside of the grandparent home in India because of religious or social "rules" (I don't know which exactely). And as in India, he will be excluded of the community, he has no choice to seperate of his white girlfriend to be able to worship Ganesh.

- As he is the only one boy in this family, he has no choice to get married to his girlfriend if he want to worship Ganesh Chaturti

Could you help me please ? Is there anybody of temple who can tell what is right or not. Should he continue his relation with that girl according to these difficulties or these reason are wrong ?

Please bring me your help.

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My friend,

I am reminded of the story of Gauri, who changed from a dark black-blue lotus color into a golden color.

 

By this same story has a mate and companion been cast out by your family, or your assumptions. This woman is as pure as her desire to make you happy and found a family with you.

 

Have you asked her in depth about her faith and willingness to ascribe completely to Hinduism? Where family is concerned, you must provide unity for the children to grow up in a stable and wise household. You may find upon asking her that she is completely capable of adapting her catholic ritual to your shared needs as a hindu family.

 

Check with the temple locally where you live, if they have one. I can almost gaurantee if you are in the US your match can be blessed in Heaven and Earth. Have you asked her to pray with you often?

 

It is natural of your folks to have concerns about keeping the faith alive. Families have a natural cycle of faithfulness meaning that one generation may be devout and the next rebellious, but they always go back and forth instead of being continuously "diluted" into faithlessness. This family at a distance remains important to you of course, but you have to realize that you are bringing new blood and new ideas with your wife that will help your family to be more resilient as time goes by. When your parents see that your children are faithful, their doubt about "purity" will be removed.

 

My generation was not ready to welcome spouses who convert. But I pray the next one will be more accepting.

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This whole thing is depend upon what you believe. There are no rule in Ganesh Upasana. As a matter of fact, our religion is called Sanatan Dharma and also our religion is an universal religion. Swami Vivekanand, and many swamies and yogies came to western countries and they taught foreign followers everything which is getting taught in India by other gurus.

I am also in the same position like you. I married catholic woman since last 16 years. She come to temples as well she goes to church too. We have son and he goes to temple and church. We are accepted by our society in India. We are still related to our community and still part of community and we are always welcome by them. There is no shame or anything wrong. In your case, your parents wrong belief is your obstacle. My cardiologist doctor is Muslim and she married with Marathi Hindu Doctor. Her marathi mother-in-law is running Cardiology Clinic Office and helping her to succeed. Mother-in-law talked to me once and she expressed her disagreements but for the sake of her son's happiness she stopped bothering such differences.

Now, you have to make your own decision based on what you believe. No one can tell you what to do. Now, time is changing. Husband and wife now partners to each other. There is no place for old thoughts. Modern life accepts everything and accommodate everything. Modern life is teaching to open up our mind and heart and accommodate whatever comes to us.

There is no end in discussing this matter so I end it here.

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