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Manaswini

Please analyse my husband chart

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DOB- 16th Dec 1970

time-6 pm( around that)

place - Orissa

 

2000- 1st marriage

2001- 1st divorce

2006 - 2nd marriage

 

His 1st son not with him. Wife will not show the son.

 

Mine:

DOB: 30th May 1973

timw-1:48 am

place- mumbai

 

2001- 1st divorce

1999- birth of daughter

2006- 2nd marriage

 

Went through 3 miscarriage. Husband very frustrated. Lot of arguments.

Trying for child this month. All tests normal. My husband threatens divorce. My daughter also needs constant discipline. I am also frustrated. Feel depressed. But cannot take medication due to pregnancy planning.

I am also short tempered. Have a hard time letting go. Then I get beating. Then is crying.

When will the difficult time end?

 

I do not want to go through another divorce??

 

I enquired sarpa yog shanti. They say in india will be good. No plan to visit .

 

Please help.

Manaswini

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My husband threatens divorce.

 

Wake up. You're husband is beating you and you want to stay in this marriage just because you don't want to go through another divorse? Violence is not okay. If you're husband is threatening you with a divorce then give him the divorse he wants. I think he is making empty threats. If I were you I'd leave him. You don't seem happy and I don't see the point to this relationship. I am sorry if this is something you don't want to hear. Be strong and LEAVE!! My advice is don't have a kid with this man because then it will be too late, you'll be stuck with him forever. What kind of person will dump someone just because they can't have a kid. Doesn't sound like love to me.

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JustRish, it is appropriate to try gentle methods before doing something so drastric. Imagine how the little daughter will feel when the parents get divorced. My parents have gone through some violent periods but I was always against them getting divorced. It is very hard for kids to go with divided love.

 

Manaswini- have you tried to do things together, chanting, walking, sharing some laughter etc.?

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DOB- 16th Dec 1970

time-6 pm( around that)

place - Orissa

 

2000- 1st marriage

2001- 1st divorce

2006 - 2nd marriage

 

His 1st son not with him. Wife will not show the son.

 

Mine:

DOB: 30th May 1973

timw-1:48 am

place- mumbai

 

2001- 1st divorce

1999- birth of daughter

2006- 2nd marriage

 

Went through 3 miscarriage. Husband very frustrated. Lot of arguments.

Trying for child this month. All tests normal. My husband threatens divorce. My daughter also needs constant discipline. I am also frustrated. Feel depressed. But cannot take medication due to pregnancy planning.

I am also short tempered. Have a hard time letting go. Then I get beating. Then is crying.

When will the difficult time end?

 

I do not want to go through another divorce??

 

I enquired sarpa yog shanti. They say in india will be good. No plan to visit .

 

Please help.

Manaswini

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Although Ascendant, Sun, Mercury, Mars of both charts go together, all in harmonizing elements, it is husband's Moon in Lion and Manaswini's Moon in Taurus which don't go together when living together in the same household. Since living quarters is ruled by Moon, the Moon of husband and wife should harmonize - for example, Moon in earth element corresponds with Moon of partner in water element, air element and earth, but not fiery element. However, since both charts have water Ascendant, the temperament of character of both, husband and wife basically go together. Since husband has Venus and Mars in Scorpio, this should explain his violent behavior - although Scorpio is the symbol of monks and ascetics, when not developed it easily becomes the opposite, degraded behaviour. Venus desideratum of both charts, water vs air doesn't correspond either, although this isn't so strong due corresponding Ascendant. Both charts require spiritual discipline to enable partnership, Mars in 12 of Manaswini and Sun squares Pluto, Ascendant sqares Pluto, Moon squares Venus, Mars and Saturn of husband, are somewhat tasks to solve that make it almost incapable of maintaining a relationship, with any partner. In sum, divorce hardly will solve the problem, both will meet similiar problems when getting remarried. Disturbing elements are there in every relationship, we have to learn to tolerate, balance oneself, sleep in separate bedrooms, cultivate friendship with other couples, perform sadhana etc.

Husband's Moon in Lion in field 2 could be that he needs to understand that materialism doesn't make us happy.

 

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JustRish, it is appropriate to try gentle methods before doing something so drastric. Imagine how the little daughter will feel when the parents get divorced. My parents have gone through some violent periods but I was always against them getting divorced. It is very hard for kids to go with divided love.

 

Manaswini- have you tried to do things together, chanting, walking, sharing some laughter etc.?

I know I must have sounded really harsh. But is it wise to stay in a marriage for the sake of kids? My uncle and aunty do not get on and are in constant arguments with each other. They are married but separated. This is what the kid has grown up watching. It does affect the child psychologically. Kids are very clever and they pick these things up. And as they grow up they see these kinds of relationships as the norm. So when they get into a relationship, they think it is alright to be beaten and that it is alright to beat. You can still get the love of your parents while they are separated. It’s completely possible and personally feel it is better. But when parents who hate each other are together, I think it is impossible to get full attention from the parent, especially when they are both so unhappy. Children can sense this unhappiness. Wouldn't the kids want their parents to be happy too? Everyone deserves happiness. I feel that having a kid is not going to solve this ladies problems. This man will continue to treat her in a bad way if she lets him. Sorry if I offended anyone.

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I know I must have sounded really harsh. But is it wise to stay in a marriage for the sake of kids? My uncle and aunty do not get on and are in constant arguments with each other. They are married but separated. This is what the kid has grown up watching. It does affect the child psychologically. Kids are very clever and they pick these things up. And as they grow up they see these kinds of relationships as the norm. So when they get into a relationship, they think it is alright to be beaten and that it is alright to beat. You can still get the love of your parents while they are separated. It’s completely possible and personally feel it is better. But when parents who hate each other are together, I think it is impossible to get full attention from the parent, especially when they are both so unhappy. Children can sense this unhappiness. Wouldn't the kids want their parents to be happy too? Everyone deserves happiness. I feel that having a kid is not going to solve this ladies problems. This man will continue to treat her in a bad way if she lets him. Sorry if I offended anyone.

 

If you read my post again, I said we should try to do gentle methods first. Counseling, etc. Eventually it may end up in divorce anyway, but think how much nicer it would be put an effort to enhance the relationship first. How can you prefer divorce to a happy marriage? I would only go for divorce as a last option.

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If you read my post again, I said we should try to do gentle methods first. Counseling, etc. Eventually it may end up in divorce anyway, but think how much nicer it would be put an effort to enhance the relationship first. How can you prefer divorce to a happy marriage? I would only go for divorce as a last option.

 

Okay, as a last option, which is also true. Why did I not think of counseling because that is a good idea. Absolutely!!

 

Sorry to the lady if I sounded harsh. (I am not married so I don't know much about these things.)

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Sai Ram,

Thank you guys. I am determined to make this work. Life is short. I donot want to be alone.

Just pray for me so that I can be more disciplined with my jaap sadhana, and will have strength and faith to try harder. It is my last birth sins, to have this kind of horoscope. Please wish me luck.

I felt supported by you guys. I will ask for your guidance from time to time. Suchandraji do not forget me. Please bestow your blessings on me.

Hare Krishna,

Regards,

manaswini

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Sai Ram,

Thank you guys. I am determined to make this work. Life is short. I donot want to be alone.

Just pray for me so that I can be more disciplined with my jaap sadhana, and will have strength and faith to try harder. It is my last birth sins, to have this kind of horoscope. Please wish me luck.

I felt supported by you guys. I will ask for your guidance from time to time. Suchandraji do not forget me. Please bestow your blessings on me.

Hare Krishna,

Regards,

manaswini

You're welcome. Just read this new article see below and thought, it is getting more and more difficult to become materially happy in this world. Now we have this situation of the upper class being so rich like never before, but are they happy? No! Instead bestsellers are books like, "Rich Dad, Poor Dad", "Cashflow Quadrant", "If You Want to Be Rich & Happy: Don't Go to School?", pointing out what Prabhupada repeated for years, "we need to teach our kids to be independent and self-sufficient. Our school system doesn't do that".

 

Clayton’s Blog

 

 

Marriage, Anyone?

 

We dont hear anything from the Moonies anymore–back in the 80’s they were always in the headlines for brainwashing this kid or that. I remember those really insipid Moonie singer-songwriters on the street with a guitar, trying to get us to come to a free dinner at their ranch. I never went to one of those–I find the Unification Church to be the most boring religion I have ever encountered in my considerable studies of religion. I understand that when you got to the ranch, you would be given two “buddies” who would try to persuade you to stay–but that is not brainwashing, it’s just sales. Rev.Moon’s idea appears to be that the problems of the world will be solved if everybody gets married–thus those huge weddings he likes to pereform with 500 couples who have just met each other, and whose partners were selected by him. I wonder how long those marriages last–I would guess about six months or less–I dont think any amouint of brainwashing can keep people in a marriage when it has gone south. Moon is a rabid right-winger, which they dont tell you, and his “theology” is boring. There is no real philosophy at all, just many front groups–brainwashed into what? First you have to have a brain!

The Hare Krsna philosophy says that women should be married–me n may if they want to, but it is better if they can maintain celibacy. St Paul agrees with this. Srila Prabhupada had a lot of problems when he began marrying off his disciples–they were always writing to him with their marital problems and he would have to tell them, “I am not a marriage counselor”. He eventually had to say, “I am not sanctioning any more marriages–get married at your own risk”

There is still a high divorce rate among the Hare Krsnas, although in the Vedi c system marriage is for life. Some say that this is because “they dont keep the rules ansd regulations”. This is mostly said by kids who have never been married. I think too many rules ansd regulations simply add to the problem–this is not 15th century India. My theory is that it is due to too high expectations–”Oh, we are going to have a Krna conscious household–it is going to be just like Vaikuntha all the time!” And it isnt, and they have bitten off more than they can chew, and usually the guy splits, and all these rejected women go take shelter at the Temple, and the Temple doesnt want to maintain them all, and on it goes.

So they say, “if the sex is good, it is a small part of a marriage–but if the sex is no good, it is a large part of a marriage” You have heard the analogy of the cow–why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free, but in a strict Hare Krsna marriage you buy the cow and dont even get any milk! You are not allowed to have sex for fun–it must be for procreation only. A few hardcorw people keep that rule–I dont think it is generally prwcticed because I have heard sermons denouncing “illicitr sex among married devotees”. I find that you can tell what kind of sex people like by the kinds that are denounced by their “spiritual leaders” All these grou;ps want to control your sex life becauase that’s the key. I have heard some very silly theories presented with great seriousness on this matter.

I consider that whatever arrangements married people make concerning the bedroom are not even God’s business–I do not want the Pope in bed with me, nor Srila Prabhupada either–its strictly the concern of the partners involved.

In the Vedic social system there are four varnas and four ashrams. The grhastha (householder) ashram supports the other three, who do not earn money. Srila Prabhupada says, “householder means, before he takes his meal, he goes out on the street and cries three times, “does anybody need something to eat?” This Vedic social system haas generated quite a bit of opinions, suggestions, and so forth within the Hare Krsna community–Prabhupada wanted to establish it but so far the devotees have been unable to. In his earlier writings, Prabhupada says that this is impossible, but later he changed his mind when he started to feel that he could do anything.

There’s really not a lot I can say on this topic–I was married once, and once is plenty enough for me–some people keep trying. Sri Ramakrishna said, the monk fights with Maya in the open field–the householder fights from a fort. If you were expecting an essay on how to be spiritual despite being a householder, you can find a lot of essays like that elsewhere–all swamis and yogis know that essay and can easily give a sermon. Problem is, after the sermon, they go away and you have to stay!

Now about gayness and marriage: There is certainly conduct in the histories that practically everybody would consider gay, although nobody dares point it out. Brahmacari life is basically a gay lifestyle without the sex. David and Johnathan, if you want to go to the Bible. The Hare Krsnas are opposed to the sex part only, because it does not result in procreation. In this, as in a number of matters, they agree with the Pope–abortion, contraception–agree with the Pope.

I do not think this “gay marriage” thing is going to be successful–40% of the population define themselves as “evangelical Christians”, and marriage is a religious institution, and the Bible does not look favorably on homosex. The government should have stayed out of the marriage business in the first place–just provide civil unions and let people get married in the church of their choice. The Catholic Church says it is a sacrament, so what business does the government have in it? And why are some gays so anxious to take part in an institution that so many straight people are trying to get out of?

I’ve given some attention to the social ideas given by Srla Prabhupada, and I find some of them to be really archaic–I dont want to go back to the Manu Samhita as the laws of the land, anymore than I want to go back to the 5th century with the Islamist terrorists. Both were very progressive in their time, but today we look on them as barbaric.

I got an unfriendly and blasphemous comment today. This guy accused my spiritual master, the Guru of the whole Universe, of going around defaming other yogis and masters. Now defamation is a very harsh word–defamation is actionable in a court–and the Krsna organization has a lot of money–yet nobody has ever sued us for defamation. Prabhupada called the modern scientists a bunch of rascals–he called a whole lot of people rascals, but he didnt say things about them which werent true! Rather to say he exposed a few people so the innocent public would not be misled, and anyhow, debunking and exposing phony yogis is fun. but it is only a very small part of our business. We are making a Revolution–in the misguided lives of this Kali Yuga, and some people will never be convinced. Like Trotsky says, ‘The Revolution is like a train–some people get on, and some people get off, but the train keeps rolling along” Speaking of that, were Adam and Eve married, or were they just living together?

There is a verse which is very important: Harernaiva harernaiva harernamaiva kevalam/kalau nasty eva nasty eva gatir anyatha, which means the only way, the only way. the only way to cross over this Dark Age is harinam–chanting the names of Hari, This means that yoga of the very old school type (Gita 6) wont work, and the various adaptations of it in yoga schools wont work either. “The devotees depend on Krsna, whereas the yogis depend on their own prowess”. You can get some small benefits from hatha yoga, but not the Goal of life. While chanting, I have had persons tell me, “That doesnt work”–but what were they expecting it to do? There is a cartoon of two Zen monks sitting in meditation–one says to the other, “OK, now what happens?” The other monk replies, “Nothing. This is it.” I think that’s very profound and true—devotional service simply leads to more devotional service–we cannot compel God to show Himself by twisting ourselves into any kinds of pretzel–but He is atracted by love. So it is not so good to maintain a personal agenda of wants while chanting.–if you dont get your wants you will decide there is nothing to it and go back to watching TV and drinking beer as your spiritual life. We are Kali Yuga persons, we have short attention spans, and just fasting til moonrise practically kills us. Yoga means moderation, according to the Master of All Yoga. When people go into it big time, keeping all the rules, getting up at 4am, doing all this stuff all day long every day, they just burn out in a year or two, split and are never seen again. And the key to chanting is to get the Name from a real source. Just like the Catholic Church is the sole source of grace, the Hare Krsna movement, in any of its branches and subbranches, is the sole source of the Holy Names–or, to be more universal, a Vaishnava is the source, in one of the four Vaishnav sampradayas–there is one coming from the Goddess of Fortune, one from the Four Kumaras, one from Lord Siva, and ours comes from Brahma. There are some differences between them, but they are basically all agreed.

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