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The Ego

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Before I had visilization by Gurudeva's Grace, the ego is a wallless entity, dark in colour, with many coverings. Suffocating, and intoxciating. Mind-numbing, everywhere. Very very dark. Imagine yourself sitting in a place, with a darkwall, it is covering on all sides and you cannot see anything. At the same time you cannot move. Or even think. Almost null and void. No light. That's the material ego! Cannot put it into words, but it was total darkness. Maybe I was shown how being unspiritual is like. And how being spiritual I can be better situtated.:crazy2:


One devotee said to me that, material pleasure is like eating stool it all tastes the same. Probably the ego likes stool. (it is material after all). But going back, the layers were amazing. There was so much to get rid of. Maybe it was Karma or something else. If I told this to somebody in street I would be sectioned and sent to a mental hostipal ( there is one in my home-town).


Anyway, the mind is not as small as I thought it was. Its like the mind thinks its 'itself' the being. When the soul is the 'being'. The mind doesn't know what the soul is. Unless Gurudeva tells us.

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