Whatever happened to love being the main thing in a marriage?

if you water the tree all parts will will get nourishment. So call love ( lust) for each other has no use in spiritual life.

I feel so too. Relationships need to be based in deeper God consciousness to harmonize and blossom. So in that sense both parties being of the same spiritual group would be a good start.

Even if they both align to one group, their individualities will remain after formal marriage...and the deepening will still need to be worked at.

Throughout the christian community back in the 60's and 70's (in my parents time) it was necessary for a protestant to convert to marry a catholic. I believe these things are not the main issue of spiritual substance. What to say of different Gaudiya groups being unable to harmonize. This Gaudiya Math/Iskcon thing surely should not come before love (I am not talking about lust here). And if it does, in my opinion, there must be some incorrect spiritual teaching in one of the groups involved.

Ofcourse though, it depends on the spiritual maturity of the couple. And maybe that is why some leaders try and protect their flock (from the slow spiritual journey plagued by doubts).

..."What is love, but whatever my heart needs around? (song lyric)"...

Material or spiritual lust? It depends on what we desire. Desire is always there one way or another.

1. Well I can't say for certain, but it seems like the case that you have to be initiated in ISKCON specifically. To this day I haven't met any married couples in iskcon who've been initiated by a guru outside of their own ISKCON school. So i've never see an ISKCON devotee married to a Gaudiya Math or Christian devotee etc.
It seems the case that the married couples first started off in brahmachari or brahmacharini ashrams, and then eventually after some training, married persons from their own school. I haven't seen them getting married to outsiders.

2. I don't know if marriage between the two schools is completely out of the question, I can't say that. It just seems like an unspoken 'thing' the iskcon devotees abide by. But I'm only under this impression because I've never met an isckon devotee who just so happened to be married to someone who wasn't part of iskcon. Maybe there are iskcon devotees married to devotees from gaudiya math. It's just I haven't seen it, and most of the devotees in iskcon seem like they'd want to be married within the same family. It certainly be more comfortable.

Of course the central focus or basis of any relationship for a Gaudiya Vaishnava would be Krishna of course, so it seems silly that there would be restrictions on marriage between people of the same Gaudiya vaishnav background. It's not like there's discussion of marriage between a devotee an atheist. But then as dev had said in his comment
"If she/he follows 4 regulative principles and chant 16 rounds as prescribed in ISKCON then go ahead with this relation."
This might be quite an important factor for the person..

Woa this topic had been dug up from 2005!

You can love Krishna/God and not be a member of ISKCON. Just saying.

And, if you really think that spousal love is solely about lust, then you have no idea what marriage is.

Very well said, bija.

I didn't mean love in the sense of desire or lust. If I meant desire or lust, I would have said one or both of those terms.
I do not consider lust to be a part of love.
Love is grounded in mutual respect and caring, in my opinion. Lust is based solely on the baser instincts and wanting to fulfill one's own desires, with self-interest being the primary objective.
Lust is not what marriage is based on. It is based on respect and love.

Wow. That's very strange.

Yes, I suppose that might be their primary concern.

Really?! Hmmm... I wonder if they ever got married or not?

Yes, feel the same here deathless. Sometimes I think as a devotee (can only speak for myself), one can be very impersonal and falsely renounced (missing out on the simplicity of relationship - with god in the centre).

Radha and Krsna are very lusty.


Wondered the same. Maybe they did, or love may have come and gone several times since.


Yeah that's it hey deathless, each to their own way and choosing. All the best to them as they follow their hearts.

Very true.
Hahaha!
Yeah, maybe it has.
Amen to that!