Pranams Bhairoji

We don't have net for 2 days. So i couldn't check messages. I am sorry for my delay. Guru means, what i mean is everyone will have their Guru and if the person gets mantra and initiation from their Guru , then only his actual spiritual journey begins (this is as per my knowledge). I also heard that some will recieve mantra in their dreams. How to find Guru who is very knowledgeble and could see Divine directly? Is it possible to find such a Guru?

We also love Sri Ramakrishna Paramahamsa and Swamy Vivekananda a lot. We do puja daily to them. We deeply regard that Sri Ramakrishna is Maha Vishnu who came to save people and Sri Sarada Devi is Goddess MahaLakshmi. In deep our hearts we always regard SRK as our Guru and everything.

Also, one more request , as i said previously, doing havan even once in 2 weeks is completely impossible task for me because of my circumstances. I am a normal house wife and my husband will never accept all these if i tell him. But he himself is very devoted to Sri Ramakrishna Paramahamsa but because of various other reasons he will not allow me to do havan even once in an year. So please guide me is there any alternative ? If i do not do havan , am i not going to attain Divine Mother ?